Hello From Brad

[ForGodsSake]

Hi im Brad. I live down here in Australia at the end of the known earth.
I became a baptist last year when i accepted JESUS into my life, and found it has been the most rewarding decision of my life.
At first it took me awhile to take being a true Christian into my heart, but i got there, despite the negativeness of the people around me. I waved off their attacks about being a baptist as i new i had made the right choice. Then the other day feeling a little low i browsed the net for a answer as to where i could find true believers in our LORD JESUS, i found this site and thought AT LAST people with the true faith, people who can help me to be more diligent with my beliefs and help me stay on the true path of rightiousness, and to be and stay a true Christian.
Thankyou Landover Baptist Church for having this site up for true Christians to come and share our true beliefs.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hello From Brad

Welcome Brad, to God's favorite forum. You've made the right decision by coming here and accepting Jesus. I assume your family are all knuckle-dragging, drunken criminal scum like the majority of your countrymen. I assume that you were raised on a diet of raw maggots and Foster's beer, and that shoplifting was the sport you went out for in school.

Praise Jesus for helping you rise above your vile roots. Through Him, anything is possible. Glory!!

Now that you're here, we'll be expecting you to click on the Paypal button at the bottom of this page and setting up your Tithing plan. Don't try and rob Jesus, boy. U.S. Dollars only. We don't take any of that funny money.

[ForGodsSake]

Re: Hello From Brad

Hey Pastor Ezekiel, so happy to be here.

I assume your family are all knuckle-dragging, drunken criminal scum like the majority of your countrymen. I assume that you were raised on a diet of raw maggots and Foster's beer, and that shoplifting was the sport you went out for in school.

Yes actually that's pretty much the the truth about it. Did not really have a good christian upbringing, fell into the hands of the law many times and was just an all round godless idiot when i was growing up. But now i am here i can concentrate on more important things like Praising our LORD And learning more from this great forum.

Praise the LORD

[JennyD]

Re: Hello From Brad

Welcome, Brad!

Congratulations on throwing off the chains of your oppressors, and beginning your life as a man truly free of sin, fear, and slavery.

Even if you are unable to leave that vile little island of Australia, rest assured that if you spend the rest of your days wholeheartedly working for the Lord (in addition to whatever it is the few WORKING Australian people do to earn a living), you will be rewarded by being permitted to join us in Heaven, where we will worship and service Him with unending praise for all eternity! Doesn't that sound glorious? I hear God even supplies solid gold kneepads!

Of course, should you decide to return to your life of sin, Fosters, and Maggot Sandwiches, I'm sure you're aware that you will be rewarded with the unquenchable fires of Hell!

[ForGodsSake]

Re: Hello From Brad

Thank you for the welcome. Yes it was truly a fresh breath of air when i asked the LORD to help me accept him into my life. The freedom to fight against my oppressors with the LORDS help was such an uplifting experience to me.
There is so many here against the LORD it is so bad here. All people here are interested in is partying getting drunk fighting against the law its so bad.
That's why my favorite passage from the bible is as my signature. These GODLESS people among us do not know when our LORD will act they keep on with there heathen and debauched way of life, and then it will be to late for those who choose to be unrepentant.

[Sister Noddy]

Re: Hello From Brad

Hi im Brad. I live down here in Australia at the end of the known earth.
I became a baptist last year when i accepted JESUS ...

Hi Brad, welcome to our GODLY Baptist forum, it's wonderful to have another sensible true Christian with us!

My name is Noddy, and I live with my son-in-law Mr Godwin, who is headmaster of Baptist Grammar School on Nob Hill, Sin Fransissco (an abomnation of a city overrun by homers), Californica!

Welcome, and Praise the Lord, JESUS is so good to us!

[ForGodsSake]

Re: Hello From Brad

Thank you Sister Noddy, May the LORD bless all his true followers.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Hello From Brad

Welcome, Brad! I am certainly pleased to see you not only there, but that you have accepted Jesus into your heart! That you found your way to Him before our missionaries even arrived is a testimony to the greatness of God and gives me reason to believe that our Mission to Australia this July will be a resounding success.

[ForGodsSake]

Re: Hello From Brad

Thank you Sister Mary Maria. Looking forward to July when your missionaries visit this UNGODLY FORSAKEN country in which i live. We really need the help down here....

JESUS BE PRAISED

[JennyD]

Re: Hello From Brad

Brad, I knew that Australia was a horrific, backwards place (even many Christians HAVE seen The Road Warrior), but I'd no idea it was SO bad!

Say strong, little brother! Jesus loves you, even if those filthy Australiennes beat you bloody, rape you to death, and eat your flesh (not necessarily in that order)!

[ForGodsSake]

Re: Hello From Brad

Thank you Sister JennyD. I try to stay locked in my home as much as possible, and only venture out once the heathen drunks and Godless scum fall on the side of the road in their own vomit due to excessive drinking.