[Roberta]

Re: Information Requested

Wow, I'm confused. I'm Canmerican, I want to use the one and only American language, but it's actually conflicting with my heart, I mean my KJV?

Be certain not to transpose your zees and esses. It's almost as bad as using words like croissant, petrol and macaroni. Oh, and guy is not pronounced like a pair kung pao pajamas.

Brassiere is okay because there is no American word for it. I refuse to wear one on general principles.

[herbertLovesGod]

Re: Information Requested

Where did the homo that started this thread go?

[herbertLovesGod]

Re: Information Requested

Brother Herbert, really?

No Christian needs any guidance but the KJV 1611.

Matthew 5:18 - Till heauen and earth passe, one iote or one title, shall in no wise passe from the law, till all be fulfilled

Clearly when one quotes scripture, one must use God's Favourite Spelling.

But in day to day speech, one needs clarity:

Corinthians 14:9 - So likewise ye, except ye utter by the tongue words easy to be understood, how shall it be known what is spoken? for ye shall speak into the air.

Now, as the True Christian Scientist Ezekiel Bathfire has shown, American is the standard language and all other languages perversions of it. So to speak clearly clearly you speak American.

And writing on the forum? Well, as Sister Roberta says, the 'u' is unAmerican. You should knock it off.

How did I not put those passages together on my own? If I didn't trust your Christian Heart sister, I would say you were a transvestite child raper male, because you are almost man smart. I feel your heart is pure however and his words are glorious. Thank you for the guidance, may you never go barren and become unwanted.

YIC
Servant Herbert.

[Catherine Moore]

Re: Information Requested

Brother Herbert, really?

No Christian needs any guidance but the KJV 1611.

Matthew 5:18 - Till heauen and earth passe, one iote or one title, shall in no wise passe from the law, till all be fulfilled

Clearly when one quotes scripture, one must use God's Favourite Spelling.

But in day to day speech, one needs clarity:

Corinthians 14:9 - So likewise ye, except ye utter by the tongue words easy to be understood, how shall it be known what is spoken? for ye shall speak into the air.

Now, as the True Christian Scientist Ezekiel Bathfire has shown, American is the standard language and all other languages perversions of it. So to speak clearly clearly you speak American.

And writing on the forum? Well, as Sister Roberta says, the 'u' is unAmerican. You should knock it off.

[herbertLovesGod]

Re: Information Requested

It may be UK Canaan spelling but it appears to be God's way of spelling as recorded in the KJV?

1 Samuel 21:13
And he changed his behaviour before them, and feigned himself mad in their hands, and scrabbled on the doors of the gate, and let his spittle fall down upon his beard.

Genesis 37:3
Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colours.

2 Samuel 8:5
And when the Syrians of Damascus came to succour Hadadezer king of Zobah, David slew of the Syrians two and twenty thousand men.

2 Kings 13:5
(And the LORD gave Israel a saviour, so that they went out from under the hand of the Syrians: and the children of Israel dwelt in their tents, as beforetime.

Wow, I'm confused. I'm Canmerican, I want to use the one and only American language, but it's actually conflicting with my heart, I mean my KJV?

ack! CHRISTIAN GUIDANCE REQUESTED, CHRISTIAN GUIDANCE REQUIRED!

Servant Herbert

[Noah Sole]

Re: Information Requested

I apologize with my entire soul for befouling this forum with U.K. Canaan spellings.

It may be UK Canaan spelling but it appears to be God's way of spelling as recorded in the KJV?

1 Samuel 21:13
And he changed his behaviour before them, and feigned himself mad in their hands, and scrabbled on the doors of the gate, and let his spittle fall down upon his beard.

Genesis 37:3
Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colours.

2 Samuel 8:5
And when the Syrians of Damascus came to succour Hadadezer king of Zobah, David slew of the Syrians two and twenty thousand men.

2 Kings 13:5
(And the LORD gave Israel a saviour, so that they went out from under the hand of the Syrians: and the children of Israel dwelt in their tents, as beforetime.

[herbertLovesGod]

Re: Information Requested

I don't know the first thing about computers, I have to get my neighbour to come round and turn mine on whenever I want to visit God's Favourite Forum.

I have noticed though that alot of the Pastors and True Christians of this forum use JesOS - God's Own Operating System.

Since purchasing a copy I've found that it automatically blocks most of the liberal homer pornography available on the internet like the BBC, the Church of England website and websites in languages other than American. I'm sure you wouldn't need it but its a great help to me as I sometimes get confused and click on the wrong link and end up on Wikipedia or some similar perversion.

This is an embarrassing true story, well, embarrassing because I probably should have gotten my wife to take an iq test before I married her ha ha!

Anyways, my wife, bless her simple soul, actually used a black marker on our first computer monitor to mark out the sinners words and protect our children. She was sharply corrected obviously. It is now a couple years later and she is not allowed near the computer (or a calculator for that matter) and only walks with a slight limp thank the Lord.

For any of you in the dark, here is what Mrs. Moore is talking about:

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0907/jesOS.html

Bless you Mrs. Moore,
Servant Herbert.

P.S. Isn't cathrine a cat-lick name? I read that only 12% of people living in the (p)u.k.(e) go to church, or at least what the engrish call church. I'm praying your husband can save enough money ... to save you ... so you can serve him without the hassles of living in hell with the english messican's and port of reakens.

[Catherine Moore]

Re: Information Requested

please update this page by using the search and replace functionality in windows 1:

I don't know the first thing about computers, I have to get my neighbour to come round and turn mine on whenever I want to visit God's Favourite Forum.

I have noticed though that alot of the Pastors and True Christians of this forum use JesOS - God's Own Operating System.

Since purchasing a copy I've found that it automatically blocks most of the liberal homer pornography available on the internet like the BBC, the Church of England website and websites in languages other than American. I'm sure you wouldn't need it but its a great help to me as I sometimes get confused and click on the wrong link and end up on Wikipedia or some similar perversion.

[herbertLovesGod]

Re: Information Requested

You need to quit putting "u"s where they don't belong; it's unAmerican. Try using spell check.

I feel like a retarded. Those Canaan's in england messed up the canadian dictionary adding letter's where ever the hell they wanted. Our money actually has a picture of the queer, I mean queen on it. I piss on it and pass it to a joo money trader to deal with. They can never wait to get their soft money counting hands on my piss stained money.

I apologize with my entire soul for befouling this forum with U.K. Canaan spellings. I am, after all, an american in training. Thank you for the guidance sister, if ever I sin as such again, please be there to catch me when I fall.

Re: Information Requested
And Jesus is capitalised as it is a proper noun

The holy spirit was moving so quickly, my hands could hardly keep up. There is no excuse great enough, only corrections:
please update this page by using the search and replace functionality in windows 1:
jesus
with
The Baby Jesus!

Thank you for the guidance brother.

Servant Herbert.

[Holyfield]

Re: Information Requested

A. What do Christians believe?
B. What do they oppose?
C. What is their main argument and supporting arguments?
D. What proof they have for their beliefs?
E. Effective military strength and total military strength?
F. List of allies.
G. List of enemies.

A. The Nicene Creed sums it up pretty good.
B. Everything that isn't Christian.
C. Jesus is the only way to a relationship with the living God and eternal life. The Bible tells us so.
D. Everything is a proof. If you don't understand that the Bible calls you a fool. Rom 1:19-22
E. God is invincible. He kills anyone He wants to instantly. Jes 37:36
F. Everyone and everything that matters.
G. Satan, his minions, and all non-christians.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Information Requested

And Jesus is capitalised as it is a proper noun

All the best.

[Roberta]

Re: Information Requested

You need to quit putting "u"s where they don't belong; it's unAmerican. Try using spell check.

behaviour

[Deaner]

Re: Information Requested

Christians believe in doing their own homework and not acting like a lazy messican's.

"Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right." (Proverbs 20:11)

So far you are asking more than doing child. Take those idle hands and wrap them around the good book and get pedantic with it. Then share intelligent questions with the great community here and we shall surely educate your misguided lazy ways.

Your other option is to take the route of a sodomite and go down that dark tunnel to hell.

Servant Herbert.

Unless they are darker than you or pagans or heathens or potential lesbo's like yourself. Don't pretend jesus is guiding your potentially lesbian hand into another woman's pants. Not only is it sinful to believe JC would condone such "behaviour" for lack of a better word, but it's just plain disgusting thinking about you laying and caressing another woman. It actually makes me physically sick.

Repent, or do not pass GO, do not collection 100 dollars, just head on down the slide labeled "Lesbo Sinner" and visit your comrade in arms, SATAN for the rest of eternity.
Servant Herbert.

Never in my several years of serving Our Lord Jesus Christ here at Landover have I ever seen someone learn so quick and so in depth as you Brother Herbert. I am proud to call you my friend.

YIC

Deaner

[herbertLovesGod]

Re: Information Requested

Christians love everyone and gently guide people into the loving arms of Jesus. Jesus died for our sins and now we are all given the chance to go to Heaven if we just believe in Him and love our neighbours.

Unless they are darker than you or pagans or heathens or potential lesbo's like yourself. Don't pretend jesus is guiding your potentially lesbian hand into another woman's pants. Not only is it sinful to believe JC would condone such "behaviour" for lack of a better word, but it's just plain disgusting thinking about you laying and caressing another woman. It actually makes me physically sick.

Repent, or do not pass GO, do not collection 100 dollars, just head on down the slide labeled "Lesbo Sinner" and visit your comrade in arms, SATAN for the rest of eternity.


Servant Herbert.

[Rev. Waynetta Kerr]

Re: Information Requested

Christians love everyone and gently guide people into the loving arms of Jesus. Jesus died for our sins and now we are all given the chance to go to Heaven if we just believe in Him and love our neighbours.