Hello Everyone

[Requisitur]

I'm here for the experience, you know? So everyone just chill and go with it, seriously, I have a sense of humor, WHY THE INFRACTION FOR POOR COMPOSITION SKILLS?

Anyways... God was an alien, how else can you explain Ezekiel's account of "god" coming down in a flying machine? If your god is almighty then why would he need a machine to fly? It doesn't make sense. He would just appear wherever he wanted to but apparently he needs a machine to fly. Almighty my ass.

[Didymus Much]

Re: Hello Everyone

I'm here for the experience, you know, Poe's law and all? So everyone just chill and go with it, seriously, I have a sense of humor...

If you think Landover is a joke, you're seriously mistaken.

[Requisitur]

Re: Hello Everyone

If you think Landover is a joke, you're seriously mistaken.

Landover is not the joke, your bank account is. You probably don't even have an Armani suit, why does god hate you?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Hello Everyone

Landover is not the joke, your bank account is. You probably don't even have an Armani suit, why does god hate you?

Great, another God-mocker got in. God hates Didymus Much because he's an atheist.

Listen up, troll. This is a Christian church's discussion forum. We are here to share parenting tips and praise the Lord. As True Christians™, we follow the entire Bible, as written, not just the bits we happen to find pleasant.

For example, many people like to think that when their loved ones die, they jet directly to Heaven to wait around for decades to meet up again. But the Bible tells us differently.

Ecclesiastes 9:5 tells us that the dead are unknowing.

Revelation 20-21 explains the events of Judgment, when God will resurrect all the dead--Saved and sinners alike--to immortal bodies. The Saved will spend eternity praising Him and worshiping and serving Him in Heaven! (Not having wild parties and living in luxury.) Everyone else, all non-Christians and all sinners, will be cast into His Lake of Fire and burned alive for all time, in unending agony.

See the difference between what people want to believe and what the Bible explains to be the objective reality?

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Hello Everyone

I'm here for the experience, you know? So everyone just chill and go with it, seriously, I have a sense of humor, WHY THE INFRACTION FOR POOR COMPOSITION SKILLS?

Anyways... God was an alien, how else can you explain Ezekiel's account of "god" coming down in a flying machine? If your god is almighty then why would he need a machine to fly? It doesn't make sense. He would just appear wherever he wanted to but apparently he needs a machine to fly. Almighty my ass.

If you did have a sense of humour you would be making people laugh, rather than being an internet bully.

YIC

[Requisitur]

Re: Hello Everyone

Ever heard of the council of Nicea? What you call the bible is just a manipulation of scriptures that were arbitrarily included and excluded, in other words the control of information to keep people like you stupid. You know nothing but how to follow. Real men do what they want (me), bitches do only what they can (you).

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Hello Everyone

Ever heard of the council of Nicea? What you call the bible is just a manipulation of scriptures that were arbitrarily included and excluded, in other words the control of information to keep people like you stupid. You know nothing but how to follow. Real men do what they want (me), bitches do only what they can (you).

Ever heard of the King James Bible (1611)?

That's when God set the record straight by some King.

Think on!

[Requisitur]

Re: Hello Everyone

If you did have a sense of humour you would be making people laugh, rather than being an internet bully.

YIC

LOL, you say people like me are going to hell, I laugh at that because it is a humorous statement. I say people like you cant afford my lifestyle, which is not only satirical in nature but just absurd and a complete non sequitur.

I want to see how absurd your argument gets in the attempt to combat my literary acumen. (its ok, whip out your dictionary)

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: Hello Everyone

LOL, you say people like me are going to hell, I laugh at that because it is a humorous statement. I say people like you cant afford my lifestyle, which is not only satirical in nature but just absurd and a complete non sequitur.

I want to see how absurd your argument gets in the attempt to combat my literary acumen. (its ok, whip out your dictionary)

You do know I'm a doctor of Psychology, don't you?

YIC

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Hello Everyone

Oh, this claptrap again? I think you're confusing us with the Catholics! Our Bible was dictated by God, without error, in 1611 to King James. Why do you think that we have such a problem with the Catholics? Among many, many other things, they have butchered the Word of God to be whatever it is that the man with the funny hat says.

As far as suits go, each of our pastors is in the good hands of our friends at Brioni. In fact, at the occasional Landover black-tie events I will sport my very own handmade suit to look my finest in front of the single ladies that attend!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Hello Everyone

Ever heard of the council of Nicea? What you call the bible is just a manipulation of scriptures that were arbitrarily included and excluded, in other words the control of information to keep people like you stupid. You know nothing but how to follow. Real men do what they want (me), bitches do only what they can (you).

Congratulations! You win the coveted "Most Tiresome and Uninteresting Troll of the Year Week Day" award!

[JoshuaH]

Re: Hello Everyone

Ungodless trolls will always plague us for our beliefs in our Lord, but they will not break our convictions, praise for Jesus.

[Zechariah Smyth]

LOL, you say people like me are going to hell, I laugh at that because it is a humorous statement. I say people like you cant afford my lifestyle, which is not only satirical in nature but just absurd and a complete non sequitur.

I want to see how absurd your argument gets in the attempt to combat my literary acumen. (its ok, whip out your dictionary)

How is your lifestyle satirical?

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hello Everyone

Landover is not the joke, your bank account is. You probably don't even have an Armani suit...

You're right, I don't have an Armani suit.


I have a closet full of them.


If you're interested in Guaranteed Salvation(c), (assuming you can afford it), you can contact me through my private email link below my signature.

If you're hear to spew hatred and persecute us, then piss off.