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  • Sammy The Penitent
    Forum Member
    Forum Member
    • Nov 2012
    • 289

    #1

    New to Landover

    hello,

    I am new to Landover and I want to introduce myself: My name is Sammy and I desire to be saved and meet members of your wonderful congregation!!
    2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.
  • James Hutchins
    True Christian™
    Just a Regular Nice Guy
     
    • Jun 2009
    • 29453

    #2
    Re: New to Landover

    Welcome Sammy. What kind of a name is that? Do you have your employers permission to go on the Internet?
    Tell me Sammy, did you read all the N00b instrutions as painstakingly outlined here:**"Noobs" please read this before posting.** SERIOUSLY!
    Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
    Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
    Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
    Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
    Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
    Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

    Comment

    • Sammy The Penitent
      Forum Member
      Forum Member
      • Nov 2012
      • 289

      #3
      Re: New to Landover

      Sammy is short for Samuel. I have read the N00b page. Praise Jesus
      2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78556

        #4
        Re: New to Landover

        Originally posted by Sammy The Penitent View Post
        Sammy is short for Samuel. I have read the N00b page. Praise Jesus
        What church do you attend? How old are you? Do you understand the concept of "introduction?"

        Tell us about yourself, your church, and your relationship with Jesus.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • James Hutchins
          True Christian™
          Just a Regular Nice Guy
           
          • Jun 2009
          • 29453

          #5
          Re: New to Landover

          Originally posted by Sammy The Penitent View Post
          Sammy is short for Samuel. I have read the N00b page. Praise Jesus
          Oh, you are a joo, no wonder you failed to follow instructions so simple even beaners understand.

          I want to like you friend, I really do. Why do you resist prostrating your secrets at the feet of Jesus? Is your shame so great?
          Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
          Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
          Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
          Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
          Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
          Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

          Comment

          • Sammy The Penitent
            Forum Member
            Forum Member
            • Nov 2012
            • 289

            #6
            Re: New to Landover

            I do not mean to appear vague. I appologize most humbly. I am a devout in Our Saviour Jess Christ. AMEN!

            I am currenty looking for a church that will fulfill me with the greatest gift of all. Redemption!!!!
            2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.

            Comment

            • Zechariah Smyth
              Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
              True Christian™
              • Feb 2011
              • 15251

              #7
              Re: New to Landover

              Hey Sammy!

              What Bible verse gets you "fired up" in the morning? C'mon, tell us all about yourself!



              Yours in Christ,

              Zech
              sigpic

              Comment

              • Matthew Hopkins
                True Christian™
                • Oct 2012
                • 808

                #8
                Re: New to Landover

                Originally posted by Sammy The Penitent View Post
                I do not mean to appear vague. I appologize most humbly. I am a devout in Our Saviour Jess Christ. AMEN!

                I am currenty looking for a church that will fulfill me with the greatest gift of all. Redemption!!!!
                How do we know you are not here to mock us? What is your favorite Bible verse, and why?

                How did Jesus touch you today? And why do use so many exclamation marks? How old are you?

                YBIC

                Comment

                • Sammy The Penitent
                  Forum Member
                  Forum Member
                  • Nov 2012
                  • 289

                  #9
                  Re: New to Landover

                  James 5:11

                  "Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy."

                  I use exclamation marks when I am very happy!
                  2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.

                  Comment

                  • James Hutchins
                    True Christian™
                    Just a Regular Nice Guy
                     
                    • Jun 2009
                    • 29453

                    #10
                    Re: New to Landover

                    Tell us Sammy, how many living sons has Jesus seen fit for your wife to make available to work for Christian Salvation(r)?
                    Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                    Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                    Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                    Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                    Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                    Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

                    Comment

                    • Deaner
                      Christ's Love Messenger
                      True Christian™
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 5932

                      #11
                      Re: New to Landover

                      Wasn't Sammy Davis Jr. a yid? You know, the guy who tried to be a member of the "rat pack" but his huge nose kept giving him away. No matter how he tried to play a drunk white guy he just couldn't pull it off. He could never get it on with a white chick either.

                      Comment

                      • Matthew Hopkins
                        True Christian™
                        • Oct 2012
                        • 808

                        #12
                        Re: New to Landover

                        Originally posted by Sammy The Penitent View Post
                        I use exclamation marks when I am very happy!
                        Well that is marvellous indeed. I use them too, when I am very happy.

                        YBIC

                        Comment

                        • Deaner
                          Christ's Love Messenger
                          True Christian™
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 5932

                          #13
                          Re: New to Landover

                          Originally posted by Matthew Hopkins View Post
                          Well that is marvellous indeed. I use them too, when I am very happy.

                          YBIC
                          I get a boner.

                          Comment

                          • Matthew Hopkins
                            True Christian™
                            • Oct 2012
                            • 808

                            #14
                            Re: New to Landover

                            Originally posted by Deaner View Post
                            I get a boner.
                            We are not all blessed with your heightened functions, brother. But I rejoice to hear of it!

                            YBIC

                            Comment

                            • Sammy The Penitent
                              Forum Member
                              Forum Member
                              • Nov 2012
                              • 289

                              #15
                              Re: New to Landover

                              I have a wonderful wife and three wonderful children. One son and two daughters.

                              I really don't know anything about Sammy Davis Jr.

                              Well, I really must go now.

                              You all have a great and reverential evening!
                              2 Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.

                              Comment

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