Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Hello, True Christians of Landover!

As you may have realized from my previous postings, I am the Reverend Mark Rodimer referenced by your recently-absent plaything visitor, PimplyPoo-HeadZilla, or whatever he was calling himself these days.

Mr. Andrew Watkins is a teenage boy (just turned 18), who has some issues which I've discussed elsewhere. Most important to me and my church were his lying about things he claimed I'd said and his claim that he writes "Christian fiction" for the church. Well, not a word of this was true.

I did speak with his parents as I'd mentioned elsewhere, and they have temporarily "grounded" him from the Internet. Your poll to ban him from the entire Internet, with over 100,000 signatures, helped them decide upon this punishment (which followed a church-prescribed and -supervised thorough rod-flogging, of course).

I'm sorry to say that he is still allowed to watch professional wrestling, but only in his own room with the door closed and music playing. I counseled against this, but his parents are rather liberal.

I have been Pastor at the lovely North Salem Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Church in North Salem, Indiana (about 30 miles northwest of Indianapolis) for the past few years, being a recent (2005) graduate of Liberty University's Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary. Being relatively young, the teens and young adults feel comfortable with me. They consider me "hip" and "kewl", and we share many "L U L Z" before getting down to business.

Your church's views are refreshing to me. Most churches in my area are very liberal supermarket churches; I'm glad to find someone else who follows every Word, just not a select few!

My favorite Bible verse (I see you ask new members this frequently) is:

Matthew 4:4
But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God.

EVERY word. Not just certain particularly tasty words.

I hope this serves as an appropriate introduction. If you have any other questions, please don't hesistate to ask!

[Talitha]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Welcome Reverend.
What a wonderful introduction.

Praise Jesus for guiding you to us.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Well Praise Jesus and welcome to God's favorite forum Reverend. It's always wonderful to have a fellow Christian Leader such as yourself visit our humble little boards. I trust you've familiarized yourself with our beliefs.

Please feel free to share some of your favorite scriptures with us. And if you ever care to favor us with a sermon, why we have a section just for that purpose.

Pay no attention to the sprinkling of unsaved trash who occasionally pass through. Jesus keeps sending them to us although why I can't imagine.

[JennyD]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Welcome, Rev. Rodimer! It's good to learn that someone understands "P.Zilla" and that the bizarre rants ascribed to you were creations of his own warped fantasy world, in which wrestling is something other than gay porn and it's OK to mock Jesus by lying about True Christians!

I do hope you're what you say you are, in contrast to another "rev" who came around recently. Forgive me if I'm a bit suspicious, but we've just had a very unpleasant experience with a closet Goth-Satanist. I think he was part Emo, as well.

[Justina Thyme]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

A belated welcome, Reverend. I've been out of town and unable to offer my felicitations.

Please be alert for any signs of DEMONIC activity in and around your church and home:

SYMPTOMS OF DEMON ACTIVITY

Did you know that one symptom of appendicitis is your tongue is coated with white when you wake up? While visiting my mother in December 1995, I had this for several days, but thought it was from the ice cream I ate the night before (should have brushed my teeth). Well, I spent our wedding anniversary in the hospital after going to emergency. On December 19 they took out my appendix.

At one time I asked myself how we can do DELIVERANCE on someone else and see all kinds of miracles, and yet suffer from ailments ourselves. After eight years in the DELIVERANCE Ministry, I have found out firsthand and from some of you, that we don't have all the answers, and we don't always get healed or get our miracle.

Does that mean we should stop praying for other people? Of course not! I would pray for healing on someone else from my sick bed if I had the chance. We must continue to do what JESUS told us to do, whether we feel like it or not. In July 1996 I spoke to a DELIVERANCE Minister who goes around teaching and preaching healing, and DELIVERANCE FROM A WHEEL CHAIR! This same man was healed of cancer years ago.

Last month I prayed for another DELIVERANCE Minister, and he told me he got worse after I prayed! I heard someone say one time that every person he prayed for with a serious illness died. He had over ten bodies lined up. It wasn't his prayer that killed them. Finally he got a miracle, but he admitted being worried a little bit. I haven't had anyone with a serious illness ask for prayer, but I would give it my best prayer and time.

Some of you DELIVERANCE Ministers have been sick, recovered, or may still be sick. God is still God. He heals us, or gives us a Miracle, or DELIVERS us as He sees fit. If it wasn't for His Grace, just think how bad off we really might be. You might get well if you start RETURNING curses, witchcraft, voodoo and the like. It amazes me how you can get a witchcraft attack (like an immediate sharp pain), pray and send it back, and it disappears immediately. The enemy does indeed send nasty things our way.

Getting back to symptoms, everyone has some symptoms of DEMON activity INSIDE. It would be nice to say we did not have any demons, but only JESUS can and did make that statement (John 8:49 & 14:30). Do you have a temper? That's a symptom! Do you eat too much? That's a symptom! Do you lie? That's a symptom! Almost anything that is going on in your being is the symptom of a DEMON. Yes, I said a DEMON. Remember, if it looks like a duck and it quacks like a duck, etc., then call it what it is, a DUCK. Every time I tell someone about DELIVERANCE, they seem to be fine until you mention that word DEMON. Do you compromise the Word of God and not use the word DEMON because you don't want to offend someone? If the true Agape Love of God is flowing in you, it is your duty to tell the truth and call it for what it is, a D-E-M-O-N. How can you be in the demon buster business if you call the duck a cat?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

A belated welcome, Reverend. I've been out of town and unable to offer my felicitations.

Please be alert for any signs of DEMONIC activity in and around your church and home:

Er, thanks, Miss Thyme.

I've had no demon problems since expelling Andrew, actually!

[eliot mayfield]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Welcome indeed. It is nice to have a respectable person around here.
Tell us more about you and how you came to Christ.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Welcome indeed. It is nice to have a respectable person around here.

Tell us more about you and how you came to Christ.

Well, Mr. Mayfield, as you noticed in my intro, I've been pastor of my flock for only a few years. I graduated Liberty University in 2005.

When I was very young, my parents and I were very close, both with each other and with Jesus . . . or so we thought. We attended a Methodist church every week, rain or shine, and said grace over meals.

In 1974, my father was drafted and sent to Vietnam. I was only five, so had a hard time understanding why he was gone, but we kept going to church, and my mother told me that if I prayed every day, God would bring Daddy home safe and sound.

God brought Daddy home, all right . . . in a cheap pressboard box with a flag draped over it, only a few weeks before the end of the war.

Mom gave up on God that day. She never set foot in a church again, and I admit to having done some questioning of my own throughout my teen years!

As a young man, I attended business school and was doing quite well financially. By the year 2000, I had made enough money in real estate to be quite comfortable. But something was missing; I realized that I'd kept God out of my life just as much as my mother had.

At that point, I decided to return to Jesus, and began attending a Baptist church. I committed my life to Him; once I was filled with His white-hot Love, I knew what to do.

In 2001, I enrolled at Liberty University, and began working toward becoming a Pastor. And here I am today, a changed and better man. I now want nothing but to help people understand God for who He is, instead of the magical wish-granting fairy or hippie love god they want Him to be.

My father died because God wanted him to. My mother rejected Him just as He knew she would, and is now in His Hell, enduring eternal punishment as He planned. Perhaps this was all part of His plan to make me into the man I am today.

[SUV]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Welcome, RevRod. Where do you stand on the "clam" issue?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Greetings from Rev. M. Rodimer

Welcome, RevRod. Where do you stand on the "clam" issue?

Well, Miss SUV, I can't say I've ever stood on a clam. I don't imagine it'd be terribly comfortable.

They are quite tasty when steamed with a little garlic butter, though! Or perhaps over linguine?

So, I suppose I am in favor of clams!

But not Clamato. That's just wrong.