ITT: Obligatory Introduction

[Dribble]

Hello all.

Let's start with the basics, shall we? First, I found my faith, through concious effort, at the young age of 6.

I had a "Christian" girlfriend for a while. However, I came to the realization that her "Christianity" was not the same as mine. So, I dumped her, never to speak again, after a three-year long relationship.

Also, I am a ninja . Ninjas are awesome, pirates fail, and they fail hard.

That's the most important information, I believe. Feel free to ask any other questions you may have.

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Oh, and why is my name pink? I don't like pink. I want it to go away, please.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Oh, and why is my name pink? I don't like pink. I want it to go away, please.

Oh great, another jap wannabe. How old are you boy?

[Deaner]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Oh, and why is my name pink? I don't like pink. I want it to go away, please.

It's pink because you are unsaved trash and by default have homosexual tendencies. You also claim to be a Christian and a Ninja. There is no such thing as a Christian Ninja. Therefore you're also an idiot you fag.

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Just as old as I need to be, thank you sir.

If it's any consolation to you, I use the term "ninja" loosely. I refer mainly to their athleticism. There is no way I could perform on the level of an actual ninja, however, I try to stay in shape by climbing and gymnastics. You know, "ninja skills."

Besides, I wouldn't have mentioned it, but the pirate and ninja emotes were too much to resist

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Just as old as I need to be, thank you sir.

Just how much time have you spent in the company of papist priests anyway?

I try to stay in shape by climbing and gymnastics. You know, "ninja skills."

Or as they're known in the real world, sodomite mating rituals. You may not be aware that gymnastics, after figure skating, are the most homosexual "sport" a young man can do. But I suspect it was the above mentioned priests that lured you into it, so I won't fault you for getting involved. Staying involved is another matter.

Besides, I wouldn't have mentioned it, but the pirate and ninja emotes were too much to resist

This lack of willpower is troubling. What else can't you resist? Drunkenness? Marihuana? Gambling? "Glory holes" in bus station men's rooms? The only thing you shouldn't resist is Christ's healing power. I hope you're ready to repent.

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

You may not be aware that gymnastics, after figure skating, are the most homosexual "sport" a young man can do.

I am aware that "gymnastics" are homosexual. However, Jackie Chan and the like do some awesome stuff; backflips, wall runs, jump ups, and the like. "Gymnastics" is merely a concise way to word my preferred form of physical activity. If you like, I could call it "parkour" (or however you spell it )

[Deaner]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Jackie Chan and the like do some awesome stuff; backflips, wall runs, jump ups, and the like.

Why do you obsess about jabbering chinks? Did Jackie Chan ever walk on water or heal someone's blindness by rubbing dirt on their eyes and then spitting on them?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Just as old as I need to be, thank you sir.

Answer the question, nancy. Judging from your posts so far I'm guessing you're about 15.

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Why do you obsess about jabbering chinks? Did Jackie Chan ever walk on water or heal someone's blindness by rubbing dirt on their eyes and then spitting on them?

I seriously doubt it. However, I am far inferior to Jesus Christ. I can no more perform His miracles than I can breathe underwater.

If you like, I can say "I try to emulate Chuck Norris." He performs awesome (but human) feats, is American, and (I believe) is Christian.

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

As far as you are concerned, I am at least 18, which is the required age to register on this site.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

As far as you are concerned, I am at least 18, which is the required age to register on this site.

This is your final chance to tell the truth before God and all His chosen. Lie and I'll ban you. Evade the question and I'll toss you into Quarantine.

How old are you?

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

18 years of age, sir.

D.O.B. 01/30/90

Of course, you can't prove I am telling the truth or that I am lying. You will have to take it on faith.

[Bob4God]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Well, can I interest you in eternal life? How about a personal relationship with the creator of the universe?

I would like to introduce you to JESUS CHRIST, sir. He died for your sins, was dead, buried, and then rose up and glory and ascended into Heaven where He and our Father are currently making a list of people who will revel in glory with them forever and ever, and who will be tossed into the bowels of the lake of fire.

Which list is your name on?

[Dribble]

Re: ITT: Obligatory Introduction

Well, can I interest you in eternal life? How about a personal relationship with the creator of the universe?

I would like to introduce you to JESUS CHRIST, sir. He died for your sins, was dead, buried, and then rose up and glory and ascended into Heaven where He and our Father are currently making a list of people who will revel in glory with them forever and ever, and who will be tossed into the bowels of the lake of fire.

Which list is your name on?

...?

That's some nice copypasta you got there. You have failed to establish relevance, however.

I don't KNOW which list my name is on; as we all know, God works in mysterious ways. However, I fervently hope that by living my life in devotion to Christ the Savior I will make it onto the former.