Greetings from Illinois!

[WWJDnow]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Hello, Sister Saffie, and welcome to God's Favorite Church(TM)!

I'd like to request that we stop all the discussion of lady parts in this thread. It's making me feel unclean--and more than a little nauseated--just reading about it. That's the sort of discussion that belongs in the women's menstrual shack, not in a public forum. I'm just not interested in women's privates.

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Praise God Sister and welcome!

Christians are becoming scarce and it is good to meet others.

I rejoice with you over your fine flock. You must be very pleased to have four wonderful sons who are already a help to their father. God must be very pleased. There is nothing wrong with having a few girls, too. The way I see it- boys are first prize and girls are only second prize, but second prize is better than nothing.

What church do you attend? I know there are but few in godless Illinois. What is your favorite Bible verse and how were you saved?

Again, welcome!

[Sister Saffie]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

She says it was because of tampon use, but I have my doubts. I don't think she was a prostitute, just a loose woman (in every sense)

[Attila's Wife]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

An unsaved woman I used to talk to just went through some disgusting proceedure called "v******* rejuvination" Sorry I can't write that word out, it makes me feel dirty. She's 26, never married, no children. Why a barren old maid like her thinks any man would want her now is beyond me, so why bother fixing up your lady parts.

Oh yuck!

I don't understand why, if she was never married, she even needs her bits tightening up. Was she a prostitute?

[Basilissa]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Welcome to our friendly forum, Sister Saffie! I'm in Michigan, so we're practically neighbors

Which of the verses of the Holy Bible do you consider your favorite?

[Sister Saffie]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

An unsaved woman I used to talk to just went through some disgusting proceedure called "v******* rejuvination" Sorry I can't write that word out, it makes me feel dirty. She's 26, never married, no children. Why a barren old maid like her thinks any man would want her now is beyond me, so why bother fixing up your lady parts.

[Thomas Taylor]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Greetings Sister Saffie, welcome to the forum.

I am really sorry to hear of your misfortune in birthing 3 girls, it must be a real trial for you. Take heart and remember what God has to say about tribulations:

Romans 5:3

And not onely so, but we glory in tribulations also, knowing that tribulation worketh patience

So tell us Saffie what is your favourite Bible verse, mine is the one in my signature.

What type of pie does your husband like, by the way?

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Saffie, I can't tell you how refreshing it is to meet a good, Christian mother and wife who knows how to post a proper introduction.

I just hope you're not into those "Kegels" exercises I heard about. Apparently some women do them so, uh, well, you know. That is to say, when a woman's birthed many children, her...

Oh, let's just pretend I never brought it up.

[Pastor Ed Lowman]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Yes he allows me on here. He actually doesn't know very much about modern technology but he is always looking over my shoulder. The only places I go to are Landover Baptist and Free Republic.

Welcome, Sister Saffie. I'd imagine you must be quite the helpmeet, and probably also a handful who must resist the occasional urge to hold over your rather simple husband all that technological knowledge. Am I right?

But so long as you know your place and are posting with your husband's permission, then all is well with you being here.

I look forward to your contributions.

Yours in Him,

Pastor Ed

[Brother Larry]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

I am new to these forums and happy to be here! I have been married for 10 years to a Godly man and am a mother of 6 (number 7 on the way in April 2014!) I attend Crossroads Community Church which is the closest I can get to a church with the standards of Landover Baptist in this area. My husband is a farmer and our 4 oldest boys are already helping (driving tractor, bailing hay) I'm so proud of them. My younger children (girls ) will be taught to be good Christian wives and mothers. I found the Lord in High School after my best friend took me to a Hell House on Halloween (Satan's Birthday). It scared me so much I turned my life over to the Lord right there. Two months later I met and married and been praying, barefoot and pregnant ever since!

Sister Saffie,

Greetings in the HOLY NAME of JESUS. I'm just tickled that you've decided to fellowship with us on this, God's Favorite Forum. I pray that you'll find the same welcome that I did when I brought my smart-alec rebellious and overbearing behind here just weeks ago. Since that time, I've been through the fire, and came up wanting. Eventually, my goal is to become holy enough to warrant moving to Freehold. Every rebuke teaches me more about GOD's love and forgiveness. "But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sonnes." (Hebrews 12:8)

I know I don't want to be a bastard! Are any of your children bastards, or have they all come to you from the holy union you share with your husband? What dishes do you prepare for him each day? Do you wait to eat until your husband and children have finished their meals?

It always concerns me when a church calls itself something nondenominational. Do you have queer pluralists in that congregation, spouting lies about how homersekshuls will sit at the right hand of the Father - well - to the right of Pastor Ezekiel, of course? Pluralists seem to think that just any old lezzybun or fairy will stroll through the pearly gates, but of course the LORD tells us a quite different story: "Know yee not that the vnrighteous shall not inherite the kingdome of God? Be not deceiued: neither fornicatours, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankinde, nor theeues, nor couetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners shall inherit the kingdom of GOD." (1st Corinthians 6:9,10)

I point that verse out to you not only to warn you about possible lions wearing sheep's clothing in an undenominational church, but also so that if any of your children show signs of being fags or lezzybuns, you can begin to formulate a plan now to properly shun them and extricate them from the tapestry of your precious family.

There are so many questions I could ask you but for now I'll just leave you to bask in the friendliness of this forum. I'm sure you'll know you're in the right place as the other members share the fruits of the Holy Spirit with you. It's exciting to know that yet another soul will grow in HIS love.

GLORY!!

[Sister Saffie]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Yes he allows me on here. He actually doesn't know very much about modern technology but he is always looking over my shoulder. The only places I go to are Landover Baptist and Free Republic.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Greetings from Illinois!

Amen and welcome. Let's hope the Lord blesses you with a boy this time.

Do you have your husband's permission to post here?

[Sister Saffie]

I am new to these forums and happy to be here! I have been married for 10 years to a Godly man and am a mother of 6 (number 7 on the way in April 2014!) I attend Crossroads Community Church which is the closest I can get to a church with the standards of Landover Baptist in this area. My husband is a farmer and our 4 oldest boys are already helping (driving tractor, bailing hay) I'm so proud of them. My younger children (girls ) will be taught to be good Christian wives and mothers. I found the Lord in High School after my best friend took me to a Hell House on Halloween (Satan's Birthday). It scared me so much I turned my life over to the Lord right there. Two months later I met and married and been praying, barefoot and pregnant ever since!