Please, allow me to introduce myself

[MookSerpent]

Greetings, I do not go to a church, but listen to the sermons of this one (northern baptists are just a bunch of faggy wimps). I do not know the actually location of my favorite verse, but it is the one where the Christians are told to be meek as lambs, yet crafty as serpents (if someone could tell me which one that is, it would be greatly appreciated. I came to know Christ later in my life, one night after getting stoned (my life has gone through great changes) when I had a vision of hell. A week later, when I could finally stop shaking, I committed my life to Christ.

I wanted to warn you of a pervasive evil that greatly threatens young men; monster girls. There is an online encyclopedia of them, with pictures that make them look voluptuous and sensual, so they can better entice men. There are even perverted games (written by joos of course) that allow players to fornicate and have gross sex.

[BaptistBethany]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Greetings, I do not go to a church, but listen to the sermons of this one (northern baptists are just a bunch of faggy wimps). I do not know the actually location of my favorite verse, but it is the one where the Christians are told to be meek as lambs, yet crafty as serpents (if someone could tell me which one that is, it would be greatly appreciated. I came to know Christ later in my life, one night after getting stoned (my life has gone through great changes) when I had a vision of hell. A week later, when I could finally stop shaking, I committed my life to Christ.

I wanted to warn you of a pervasive evil that greatly threatens young men; monster girls. There is an online encyclopedia of them, with pictures that make them look voluptuous and sensual, so they can better entice men. There are even perverted games (written by joos of course) that allow players to fornicate and have gross sex.

What terrible sin did you commit that compelled people to stone you?

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Dear Mr. Serpent,

I can see that your nickname is a simpleton anagram (most usually they are tools by Satan) of "MEEK REPENTS". This would have been quite an appropriate user name for this Godly forum. Why did you mix the letters to produce the name of the vilest of the animals in the Garden? The True Christians have been most kind letting me stay and learn here, I hope you show the repentance required and be allowed to stay also.


I suggest Job 42:6Wherefore I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes.


What is your favourite verse in the KJV? How many boys and female offspring do you have? How do you punish them?


But - Welcome here! These True Christians are the kindest instructors you can find if you stay humble and leave your doubts behind!

Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[MookSerpent]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

"Stoned" means high on drugs.

Mr. White, you obviously didn't read through my first post, in which I stated the source of my username (a scriptural reference).

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

My apologies, Mr. Serpent.

I still have a lot to learn and I'm afraid I am sometimes too emotional, weak in disciplining my famility and tend to avoid intrigue and craftiness - just relying on the straightforward word of our LORD.



That is why I would personally opt for repentance and prayer (Psalms 69:10).

I hope you find these forums and the True Christians kind and welcoming as I have.

1 Corinthians 16:20

Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[LeAtheist]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

My apologies, Mr. Serpent.

I still have a lot to learn and I'm afraid I am sometimes too emotional, weak in disciplining my famility and tend to avoid intrigue and craftiness - just relying on the straightforward word of our LORD.



That is why I would personally opt for repentance and prayer (Psalms 69:10).

I hope you find these forums and the True Christians kind and welcoming as I have.

1 Corinthians 16:20

Yours in Christ,

Elmer

Maybe you want a beating?

[Attila's Wife]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Greetings MeekSerpent.

Are you by any chance thinking of Matthew 10:16-17?

Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as serpents, and harmless as doves. But beware of men: for they will deliver you up to the councils, and they will scourge you in their synagogues;

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Soory, Mr. Atheist, I gave up that pleasure when I began to follow the guidance of our LORD. Alas, the rod is no longer meant for me (for its other uses, please, see my signature below).

However, I am worried about your complexion. I'll pray for the sores on your face to vanish. There are True Christian doctors here who could perhaps validate my initial diagnosis based on God's Word:



Leviticus 13:2When a man shall have in the skin of his flesh a rising, a scab, or bright spot, and it be in the skin of his flesh like the plague of leprosy; then he shall be brought unto Aaron the priest, or unto one of his sons the priests.
Do not worry, it is surely nothing that a decent amount of prayer would not cure.

YiC,

Elmer

[LeAtheist]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Soory, Mr. Atheist, I gave up that pleasure when I began to follow the guidance of our LORD. Alas, the rod is no longer meant for me (for its other uses, please, see my signature below).

However, I am worried about your complexion. I'll pray for the sores on your face to vanish. There are True Christian doctors here who could perhaps validate my initial diagnosis based on God's Word:



Leviticus 13:2When a man shall have in the skin of his flesh a rising, a scab, or bright spot, and it be in the skin of his flesh like the plague of leprosy; then he shall be brought unto Aaron the priest, or unto one of his sons the priests.
Do not worry, it is surely nothing that a decent amount of prayer would not cure.

YiC,

Elmer

I would be more than happy if you could direct me to one of these doctors you are speaking about.

God Bless your soul

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

I would be more than happy if you could direct me to one of these doctors you are speaking about.

God Bless your soul

Mr Atheist,

I dare not even think of knowing these True Christians at a personal level, and I may be stepping off my boundaries, but, for instance, the posts by Dr. Laurence Niles, a True Christian, are most impressive. I suggest that you try prayer, fasting, sackcloth, ashes and remorse first and, in case of an emergency, True Christians might offer additional assistance. I would not disturb them unless your own (and mine) repentance and prayers failed (they might).

In addition, Leviticus 13:45 and the verses thereafter have some excellent practical points regarding your situation on personal hygiene, housing, etc.

I'll also pray a few hours for you today.

Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[LeAtheist]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Mr Atheist,

I dare not even think of knowing these True Christians at a personal level, and I may be stepping off my boundaries, but, for instance, the posts by Dr. Laurence Niles, a True Christian, are most impressive. I suggest that you try prayer, fasting, sackcloth, ashes and remorse first and, in case of an emergency, True Christians might offer additional assistance. I would not disturb them unless your own (and mine) repentance and prayers failed (they might).

In addition, Leviticus 13:45 and the verses thereafter have some excellent practical points regarding your situation on personal hygiene, housing, etc.

I'll also pray a few hours for you today.

Yours in Christ,

Elmer

you are indeed a wonderful, caring person. Your soul will be safe with God

[James Ashton]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Greetings, I do not go to a church, but listen to the sermons of this one (northern baptists are just a bunch of faggy wimps). I do not know the actually location of my favorite verse, but it is the one where the Christians are told to be meek as lambs, yet crafty as serpents (if someone could tell me which one that is, it would be greatly appreciated. I came to know Christ later in my life, one night after getting stoned (my life has gone through great changes) when I had a vision of hell. A week later, when I could finally stop shaking, I committed my life to Christ.

Greetings. Over here, it is southerners who are faggy wimps; yet more proof if it were needed that the UK has strayed far from God's plan.


Regardless, that wasn't why I popped in. I just wanted to share a trick I use for when I can't remember the passage I want (not all of us can be as holy as Pastor Zeke). What I do is I open my Bible at Genesis 1:1 and keep reading until I reach Revelation 22:21. That way, I find the verse I want.


You should try it.

I wanted to warn you of a pervasive evil that greatly threatens young men; monster girls. There is an online encyclopedia of them, with pictures that make them look voluptuous and sensual, so they can better entice men. There are even perverted games (written by joos of course) that allow players to fornicate and have gross sex.

Monstrous women are not unknown to Christianity (or what passes for Christianity in Scotland at least.)

[Mother Of Seven]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Monstrous women are not unknown to Christianity (or what passes for Christianity in Scotland at least.)

Thank you for that Mr Ashton. I wasn't aware that John Knox was as close to a True Christian as could be had in god-forsaken England in those days.

[MookSerpent]

Re: Please, allow me to introduce myself

Thank you, Attila's Wife, that was the verse I was looking for.

I wasn't specifically referring to "monstrous women," but to the anime characters known as "monster girls." Just Google "Monster girl encyclopedia" and you'll see what I'm talking about.