Praise be!

[Rastus]

Hello good White folk and former Nigras. Thank White Jesus for this Godly website.

I'd like to make a full confession of my sorry Nigra life before I found the White man's God.

I have looked at White women with lustfulnesses...

I once didn't let a White man have the right of way at a four way stop sign...

I have stolens pies, too many for a Nigra to count, I have snucken to the White laides' window sill and ran away with they pies, leavin' little White chillin's pie-hungry. (Have mercy on my poor 3/5th's of a soul.)

I once gave a cigarette to a Injun..,

I has snucken into the White man's garden a stolens they watermellons...

On more than one ocassions, I failed to sit in the back of the bus...

All my fambly is darkies...moon crickets...spooks..an yard apes. Have Mercy!

There's more...but my poor Negro brain can't keep up with all the thought...

Please pray for me, so that I might go to the Darkie-Heaven Sub-Section™

Rastus

[Nobar King]

Re: Praise be!

Well, Rastus, you have come to the right place. I'm sure there will be other True Christian brothers along soon to welcome you.

[Talitha]

Re: Praise be!

OH MY!!!!
They seem to be letting all sorts in here these days. It just goes to show how tolerant and caring we True Christian(tm) really are.

Now then Mr Rastus. Tell me, do you have any experience in a Garden? I have a Messican out there right now but he is so darn lazy.

Anyway, I shall Pray for you, and in the meantime you can maybe give us a Tap Dance?

[Ebenezer Wright]

Re: Praise be!

I once gave a cigarette to a Injun..,

Rastus

Welcome friend, You are truly lucky to have tempted fate by dangling a cigarette in front of an injun, and surviving to tell about it. They are know to scalp anyone who isn't in their tribe. Tell us a little about yourself. Any favorite verse? Do you know what a KJV Bible is? How old are you?

[Don the Baptist]

Re: Praise be!

Anyway, I shall Pray for you, and in the meantime you can maybe give us a Tap Dance?

Or perhaps a nice shoe shine??

[Billybob Sunday]

Re: Praise be!

Brothers and sisters,

I am wary of this colored fellow. The nappy-headed boy comes here for fellowship and claims to confess his sins, but I see no admission of his drug use, criminal history, or bastard children.

Yours in Christ

[Nobar King]

Re: Praise be!

Look, brothers, Rastus is offline now, so let's give him the benefit of the doubt. He may be contemplating his sins right now and be composing his contrition.

Until then, maybe someone could send a messenger around to Brother Remy? This character may need to talk to someone who understands him. You cannot be too careful in these circumstances.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Praise be!

I couldn't understand a word the boy was saying. What does he want, a handout?

[Don the Baptist]

Re: Praise be!

Perhaps he is looking to unload his monthly allotment of food stamps for malt liquor and Newports; or searching for some pies to pilfer...

[Rastus]

Re: Praise be!

Master Billybob Sunday,

I admited my grievous sin of deciding to be born a darkie; drug use, criminal history, and bastard children implied.

Master Ebenezer,

KJV Bible - Yes, my thievin' darkie daddy stoled one from a Motel 6 in South Carolina once (along with the TV, telephone, sheets, towels, bath tub etc).

I'm 39...or 41...maths is hard for a Nigra.

Favorite verse, EPHESIANS 6:5

[Roberta]

Re: Praise be!

I'm 39...or 41...maths is hard for a Nigra.

I bet you know how long your tallywhacker is, don't you boy.

[Billybob Sunday]

Re: Praise be!

I'm 39...or 41...maths is hard for a Nigra.

I bet you know how long your tallywhacker is, don't you boy.

He likely can also multiply by 90 percent whenever he shakes down his "hos".