[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

What does it do? Does it slay heathens?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

This abomination is the hot #1 toy for sale in Godless japan. The slants just don't get it, do they? They want to miniaturize and make a robot out of everything they see.

[SUV]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Oh, I'm SURE Satan just looooves this toy!. Boxing, humping robots!

Surely we are in the Last Days(tm).

Disgusted, Sister Thumper

Oh.my.God.

The eggheads always theorize as to what causes Homer!sexiness. But, Sister Thumper, that is the proof of the (Christmas?) pudding.

Not "pissed" off, but awash with the fine spray that comes from basting Christmas Turkeys,

SUV

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Oh, I'm SURE Satan just looooves this toy!. Boxing, humping robots!

Surely we are in the Last Days(tm).

Disgusted, Sister Thumper

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Ouija boards rock. And they don't cause homosexuality.

I knew it. You ARE related to Icky.

[SUV]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Ouija boards rock. And they don't cause homosexuality.

Oh GOD, Sisters - have you ever heard of such foolishness? I think this Child has been Eating too many Candy Canes!

[hellion]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

We do this every year and I'm sure we have saved many children from evil toys. Hopefully nobody needs to be reminded about the Harry Potter Broomstick, so I won't list it this year. But I do want to put the bad old Ouija Board on the list not because it encourages witchcraft and Satanism, but because there's new evidence that Ouija can cause homosexuality! So I will start the list with Ouija. Please add your banned toys . . . good children are counting on our advice. Mother Glynndie

Ouija boards rock. And they don't cause homosexuality.

[Darren Ingram-Myers]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Only terrorists would give this toy to a child. I'll boycott any shop that carries them!

Not only does it speak satanic mudslime incantaions, but it comes with a real dynamite fanny pack. This disgusts Jesus.

I should get one of those for Kayla. It will teach her multiculturalism.

[SUV]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Only terrorists would give this toy to a child. I'll boycott any shop that carries them!

Not only does it speak satanic mudslime incantaions, but it comes with a real dynamite fanny pack. This disgusts Jesus.

Aw, it probably doesn't matter anyway. When the mudslums get Word she's not wearing her burqa they'll crash all their carts into these Satanic Curses then stomp them into tiny pieces on the floor.

"Allah Akbar?"

Yeah - Right

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Life sized dolls are demonic and just asking for children to develop unhealthy perversions.

Concerned, Sister Thumper

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Only terrorists would give this toy to a child. I'll boycott any shop that carries them!

Not only does it speak satanic mudslime incantaions, but it comes with a real dynamite fanny pack. This disgusts Jesus.

Leave it to the mooselimbs to come up with a doll that says that it likes ass-salami, whatever the heck that is. I wonder what other "beautiful Islamic phrases" it says in both towelhead gibberish and a real language — "Death to all Christians," perhaps?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Only terrorists would give this toy to a child. I'll boycott any shop that carries them!

Not only does it speak satanic mudslime incantaions, but it comes with a real dynamite fanny pack. This disgusts Jesus.

[Mrs. Rogers]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Beware Australians bearing gifts; their mechanical animals are as randy and vulgar as the convicts who create them, and therefore have no place in the True Christian stocking.



"Wombat Devine" my foot!

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

I know that the overwhelming majority of Saved® True Christian™ parents don't need to be told this, but there are certain dolls out there that you should never, ever, ever give to your children unless you want them to turn out like hellion or Darren:

Warning: Totally depraved link — do not click without adequate spiritual preparation and Bible reading beforehand.

Of course, I had to click on that "totally depraved link" sort of like trying not to look at a train wreck! Anyway, call me shallow in a small town way, but why is Tattoo Carlos' rather skimpy thong so mis-shaped??? Or do I really want to know???

[Brother Temperance]

Re: BANNED Toys - Let's Make a List

Tom of Finland

Why oh why am I so unsurprised to find the Finndevils have their fingers in this wicked enterprise?