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  • #1

    St. Mikulas day

    I wqas in town the other day picking up some supplies for the camp when I heard about this sick tradition. But after I thought about it for awhile with some modifications, it could be useful.

    The tradition is that St. Mikulas goes around giving kids candy.
    (A catholic giving kids candy! right!) With him is the devil and an angel. If the kids have been bad, the devil threatens to take them to Hell! But then the angel stops him and if the kid says a poem he doesn't go to Hell.

    Now, I think if we changed the Mikulas for a pastor and let the devil really put the kids in a sack and drug them around for a while and then beat the "Hell" out of them this could be a great new tradition!
    Matthew:
    5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
    5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
    10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
    10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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  • #2
    Re: St. Mikulas day

    Originally posted by eliot mayfield View Post
    I wqas in town the other day picking up some supplies for the camp when I heard about this sick tradition. But after I thought about it for awhile with some modifications, it could be useful.

    The tradition is that St. Mikulas goes around giving kids candy.
    (A catholic giving kids candy! right!) With him is the devil and an angel. If the kids have been bad, the devil threatens to take them to Hell! But then the angel stops him and if the kid says a poem he doesn't go to Hell.

    Now, I think if we changed the Mikulas for a pastor and let the devil really put the kids in a sack and drug them around for a while and then beat the "Hell" out of them this could be a great new tradition!
    Not a bad idea Brother Eliot. We could give them the chance to forego the sack beating if they can recite a book from the KJV Bible by heart.

    As for mary-worshipers handing out candies to children; its an old trick they used to lure them into some nearby church the better to bugger them in private.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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    • #3
      Re: St. Mikulas day

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      Not a bad idea Brother Eliot. We could give them the chance to forego the sack beating if they can recite a book from the KJV Bible by heart.

      As for mary-worshipers handing out candies to children; its an old trick they used to lure them into some nearby church the better to bugger them in private.
      Yes, but a book chosen at random by the pastor.
      Matthew:
      5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
      5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
      10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
      10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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      • #4
        Re: St. Mikulas day

        Originally posted by eliot mayfield View Post
        But then the angel stops him and if the kid says a poem he doesn't go to Hell.
        Typical Catholics: They don't ask them to recite a prayer or a Bible verse, but a poem. Everyone knows that poetry is for queers anyway.
        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

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        • #5
          Re: St. Mikulas day

          So the kids just stand there while a fat catlicker with a sack and the devil walk up and start talking to them?
          Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
          "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
          Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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          • #6
            Re: St. Mikulas day

            Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
            So the kids just stand there while a fat catlicker with a sack and the devil walk up and start talking to them?
            There's candy.

            Nobody said they were bright kids.

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