[Mistress Cookie]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

How would a bachelor like myself get in on such a program?

Are you willing to load up all the vintage Corning Ware we're getting out of Widow Sarah way (to ease her departure), and will you drop it off?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

Are you willing to load up all the vintage Corning Ware we're getting out of Widow Sarah way (to ease her departure), and will you drop it off?

I'm not in Freehold right now, wasn't planning to come until the snow melts in spring . . . but if someone has a vehicle I can borrow (or can drive me about) that will get around on the unplowed roads, I could conceivably visit sooner and help transport Widow Sarah's vintage Corning Ware to a safe and secure location.

I bet Widow Helen could take care of some of it. She's still staying out at James's guest house, but looking for her own place in town. She's hoping to find a nice house in town with mixed-use zoning, so she can have a commercial kitchen/cafe downstairs to make and sell her meat pies, and a small apartment upstairs.

[BelieverInGod]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

Are Dolly and Dotty your cats?



Don't worry, Brother. Any recipes calling for cheese will use real cheese.

Here's the deal (and I think Sister BIG will agree): You will be adopted into the new Landover Ladies' Labors of Love program, which entitles you to one (1) casserole OR (not and/or) pie per week. We will not take requests, but will make for you whatever we're whipping up in our own kitchens, as it occurs to us during the week. We'll just double the recipe, and that's it. Items may occassionally arrive frozen.

In exchange, of course, you will kindly stop this ridiculous fuss you're putting up about the shock-proofing of poor, feeble Widow Sarah's home.

This offer is non-negotiable.

Are you onboard?

(PS: We'll also throw in a thermos of chocolate milk for Roger.) (PPS: And one scratch on a piece of our new Corning Ware and the deal's off.)

I'm on board, but um.... usually when I'm sending something to another persons house, I use disposable aluminum dishes. I've just lost too many dishes in my life to risk Corningware.

Would this be acceptable?

I'm not in Freehold right now, wasn't planning to come until the snow melts in spring . . . but if someone has a vehicle I can borrow (or can drive me about) that will get around on the unplowed roads, I could conceivably visit sooner and help transport Widow Sarah's vintage Corning Ware to a safe and secure location.

I bet Widow Helen could take care of some of it. She's still staying out at James's guest house, but looking for her own place in town. She's hoping to find a nice house in town with mixed-use zoning, so she can have a commercial kitchen/cafe downstairs to make and sell her meat pies, and a small apartment upstairs.

I have the truck, as long as you feel safe with a woman driving. I do take a defensive driving course every year through Seth's company so that I can be classified an "occasional driver" on his vehicle. It's a 4X4 diesel F350, so there's not much out there that can stop it.

[HTannor]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

My, my, my. So much to respond to.

Brother Judge Tannor, the only documentation that comes with Corningware is the receipt from the store you bought it from.

Actually, I knew that, but was a bit unclear in my explanation. I was thinking in terms of a bill of sale properly notarized from the nearly dearly departed that itemizes your newly transferred property.

If she is unable to provide that, then I suggest your contact by favorite barrister, Brother Gabriel Reproba, Esq, who specializes in acquiring difficult-to-negotiate Powers of Attorney. The good Brother gets the PA appointing him as custodial agent, signs the bill of sale, you take possession, problem solved.

I'm sure you and he can arrive at a mutually-beneficial arrangement.

Are Dolly and Dotty your cats?

Miss Dolly and Dotty, are the delectable Dingle sisters. These fine ladies of the night are residents in my trailer park and are the sources of never-ending amusement.

In exchange, of course, you will kindly stop this ridiculous fuss you're putting up about the shock-proofing of poor, feeble Widow Sarah's home.

This offer is non-negotiable.

Are you onboard?

(PS: We'll also throw in a thermos of chocolate milk for Roger.) (PPS: And one scratch on a piece of our new Corning Ware and the deal's off.)

After due consideration, I find your offer acceptable.

Widow Helen could ... sell her meat pies.

After recently viewing Sweeney Todd, please inform the Widow Helen I will probably not take advantage of her baking skills.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

Okay, we're set then. Sister BIG, meet me at the Widow Sarah's after the church potluck. I don't think we need any more help, because who wants to end up cooking for the entire town for the next 50 years. Brother Rod, you can join the program when you move here. Judge Tannor, you'll get deliveries in aluminum from BIG and Corning Ware from me but like I said Don't scratch it. And BIG, I'll look and see what I have out in the carriage house but if you have any extra crates and maybe some straw, it will keep things from shifting around in the back of the truck. We'll have to make a few trips. Wear flats.

Wow. I think this whole thing proves why more people don't get involved in charity work. It gets so complicated. But helping a sweet soul like the Widow is so rewarding, it makes it all worth it
It's really true what they say about helping others: you get back what you give, tenfold.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

After recently viewing Sweeney Todd, please inform the Widow Helen I will probably not take advantage of her baking skills.

But you so enjoyed the pies she sent to the trailer park some months back . . . She figured you would be a regular customer!

Say, did she ever get Jolene over for dinner? Widow Helen told me a while back she'd found a rum-soaked flambe recipe, and she thought Jolene would be just the person to try it out on.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

Sister BIG: After you've recovered from our "clean-sweep" "shock-proofing" volunteer work yesterday, I wanted to make sure none of your patterns got mixed up with mine.

Below are the odds and ends I kept.

(I also just remembered I put the Corning Ware from the Widow Sarah's garage in a storage warehouse last month....so you should look that stuff over, too. I've been looking on ebay to match up what some of the obscure pieces are, and what they're worth, etc.)

Thanks for helping yesterday! I think the new Landover Ladies' Labors of Love program is going to be a huge success for everyone concerned!

Hallelujah!
.

[HTannor]

Re: SIGN OF END TIMES - CORNINGWARE

But you so enjoyed the pies she sent to the trailer park some months back . . . She figured you would be a regular customer!

The pecan pie was delicious and only marginally enhanced with a dollop of cool whip - a sorely under-appreciated condiment that's equally at home on a rack of baby back ribs.

Alas, when Roger dug into the the "mincemeat" pie, he gagged on what appeared to be a discarded appendix. I took the offending morsel to my laboratory for further examination. We were unable to determine species and Wikipedia was stragely silent on whether an appendix is exclusive to humans.

We returned to the dining area and were alarmed to see that Skippy seemed to have eaten the remaining slices. The next morning the poor simian had a terrible case of the trots, so we threw him into DeWitt's boat and nailed plywood over the holes.

I now avoid any pies where the word "meat" is part of the name.

Say, did she ever get Jolene over for dinner? Widow Helen told me a while back she'd found a rum-soaked flambe recipe, and she thought Jolene would be just the person to try it out on.

Ah, yes, the lovely Jolene. And what fond memories I will carry of her through the rest of my days.

When I found myself elevated to the bench, I feared the fair damsel would have problems while engaged in intercourse with other spouses in our judicial circles.

I had strongly encouraged her to get her GED, but nnnoooo. She felt intimidated by my lofty degree from the LaSalle Institute's Law Correspondence school. She refused to return to the halls of academe, so she remounted the wheels under her single wide and moved on. (We found over $2,000 in refundable beer cans scattered around the area formerly covered by her trailer - so we can eat the loss of lot rent for a few months.)