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  • #1

    Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

    It is my understanding that you members of the weaker sex are often vexed by a very particular type of "back ache." It may interest you to know that there's a product, Dr. Scott's Electric Flesh Brush, which may alleviate some of your "back aches":



    I've always thought there was no better cure for a lady's "back ache" than a good, full day of cooking and cleaning, but I understand there are a wide variety of electric devices out there which can help you with your "back aches." What are some of the other ones that have worked well for you?
    WARNING:
    In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
    REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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  • #2
    Re: Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

    You're so considerate. But, it is important to keep them fit to keep producing Warriors for Christ.
    II Kings 2:23-24: 23And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. 24And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the LORD. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

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    • #3
      Re: Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

      Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
      I understand there are a wide variety of electric devices out there which can help you with your "back aches." What are some of the other ones that have worked well for you?
      As much as the discomfort of these back aches can debilitate me from time to time, I would much prefer to remember my awesome Savior!

      The way I see it, and the way I explain it to my girls, the LORD created man and woman in His own image.

      So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him;
      male and female created he them.
      Genesis 1:27


      That right there was an enormous, unmerited gift! Oh to be made in the very Image of a Perfect God!

      As for God, his way is perfect: the word of the LORD is tried:
      he is a buckler to all those that trust in him.
      Psalm 18:30


      But then Eve's pride got the best of her (it is a temptation all women have). She wasn't satisfied with enjoying the life God gave her, so she complained, found someone who validated her whiny ego, and tried to take authority where it was not granted her.

      And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes,
      and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
      Genesis 3:6


      For this terrible rebellion against a Good and Loving God, He threw them out of the Garden and formalized her subservient role. The pain in childbirth is the consequence for a woman's pride, and those "back aches peculiar to women" are but a gentle reminder for her to mind her place in creation.

      Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception;
      in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
      Genesis 3:16


      The way I see it, if we try and remove this gentle but loving reminder, we would forget that it reminds us of our loving Creator, the Potter who determines what each pot shall be. (Isaiah 64:8) If we can trust Him with our immortal souls, surely we can trust Him with knowing what's best for us here and now. Why would we want to ignore that?




      Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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      • #4
        Re: Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

        Those are sage words, Mrs. Etheldreda!
        WARNING:
        In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
        REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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        • #5
          Re: Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

          To hell with her "aches" she must submit and be ASHAMED!

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

            Mrs. Hutchins sister had one of those electric brushes. She dropped it in the bathtub. She was such a slut (Mrs. Hutchins' sister, not Mrs. Hutchins).
            Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
            Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
            Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
            Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
            Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
            Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Those "back aches" peculiar to women.

              Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
              Mrs. Hutchins sister had one of those electric brushes. She dropped it in the bathtub. She was such a slut (Mrs. Hutchins' sister, not Mrs. Hutchins).
              Was she (Mrs Hutchins sister) punished by God?
              II Kings 2:23-24: 23And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. 24And he turned back, and looked on them, and cursed them in the name of the LORD. And there came forth two she bears out of the wood, and tare forty and two children of them.

              Comment

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