Tweet
THIS just in: A wild female jigaboo has been running around the countryside kidnapping men and forcing them to put their mouth on her cooter. Thankfully she has been apprehended by the police, but the rest of her gang is most likely headed our way. Men: Be on the lookout!
Woman Accused Of Kidnapping And Forcing Muscle Man To Perform Oral Sex
Victim’s statement to police (partial):
She made me eat her, you know, vagina and her anus despite me begging and crying for her to not make me do it
The story goes:
The Clinton, Mississippi Police Department released vivid details about a bodybuilder who was kidnapped and sexually tortured by 43-year-old Cathy Priest.
The Florida (use of the Sunshine State always adds a ring of validity to any potentially made-up too crazy to be true story!) man was visiting Jackson, Mississippi for a bodybuilding competition when he was snatched from an alley at gunpoint and then forcibly snatched some more.
Priest forced the victim into her Mazda Miata and then drove him to her nearby mobile home where she proceeded to tie his hands and ankles and insert a butt plug into his rectum. For the next seven days straight, she forced him to perform oral sex on her for up to four hours at a clip.
Victim’s statement to police (continued):
But she had a .357 pointed at me and said she’d shoot me in the foot. At one point, she tried to make me penetrate her, but I couldn’t get an erection, despite her giving me oral, and putting a vacuum cleaner hose over my penis and turning it on.
She starved me too. Said she was the only thing I needed to eat. She let me drink Pepsi though, so I was never thirsty. Although I hate Pepsi, because it has extremely high sugar content and too many carbs.
After Priest passed out from drinking too many boxes of wine, and popping a bunch of what appeared to be Xanax, the vic launched the great escape. It was his only chance, as his captor never slept.
Florida Man Disembowels Girlfriend After She Says Ex’s Name During Sex
Priest denies all allegations, claiming he was a Mormon missionary trying to “recruit me into his Devil religion.”
Perpetrator’s statement to police:
After I says no to becoming a mormon (sic), he said when he saw me first open the door it was ‘love at first sight,’ and he wanted to lick my bang holes. I love big muscles. I love muscle men. So, I invited him in and we started sexing. But I don’t kidnap nobody. I’m just a weak woman.
Guy’s just making excuses and blaming me. Cause he don’t want to get in trouble with his religion.
Police, however, located a weapon in Priest’s mobile home that was consistent with the one the muscle man described and witnesses who found the bound victim have attested that he was highly distressed.
Priest has been charged with kidnapping and sexual torture.
Victim’s statement to police (partial):
She made me eat her, you know, vagina and her anus despite me begging and crying for her to not make me do it
The story goes:
The Clinton, Mississippi Police Department released vivid details about a bodybuilder who was kidnapped and sexually tortured by 43-year-old Cathy Priest.
The Florida (use of the Sunshine State always adds a ring of validity to any potentially made-up too crazy to be true story!) man was visiting Jackson, Mississippi for a bodybuilding competition when he was snatched from an alley at gunpoint and then forcibly snatched some more.
Priest forced the victim into her Mazda Miata and then drove him to her nearby mobile home where she proceeded to tie his hands and ankles and insert a butt plug into his rectum. For the next seven days straight, she forced him to perform oral sex on her for up to four hours at a clip.
Victim’s statement to police (continued):
But she had a .357 pointed at me and said she’d shoot me in the foot. At one point, she tried to make me penetrate her, but I couldn’t get an erection, despite her giving me oral, and putting a vacuum cleaner hose over my penis and turning it on.
She starved me too. Said she was the only thing I needed to eat. She let me drink Pepsi though, so I was never thirsty. Although I hate Pepsi, because it has extremely high sugar content and too many carbs.
After Priest passed out from drinking too many boxes of wine, and popping a bunch of what appeared to be Xanax, the vic launched the great escape. It was his only chance, as his captor never slept.
Florida Man Disembowels Girlfriend After She Says Ex’s Name During Sex
Priest denies all allegations, claiming he was a Mormon missionary trying to “recruit me into his Devil religion.”
Perpetrator’s statement to police:
After I says no to becoming a mormon (sic), he said when he saw me first open the door it was ‘love at first sight,’ and he wanted to lick my bang holes. I love big muscles. I love muscle men. So, I invited him in and we started sexing. But I don’t kidnap nobody. I’m just a weak woman.
Guy’s just making excuses and blaming me. Cause he don’t want to get in trouble with his religion.
Police, however, located a weapon in Priest’s mobile home that was consistent with the one the muscle man described and witnesses who found the bound victim have attested that he was highly distressed.
Priest has been charged with kidnapping and sexual torture.
Comment