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  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78552

    #1

    Jap Scientists Make "Food" Out of Feces!

    The vile sneaky japs are at it again. This time they're inventing food out of human poo! They serve it in high priced chop suey houses! And they eat it!

    Japan scientist synthesizes meat from human feces

    It's being called the "poop burger". Japanese scientists have found a way to create artificial meat from sewage containing human feces.

    Somehow this feels like a Vonnegut plotline: population boom equals food shortage. Solution? Synthesize food from human waste matter. Absurd yes, but Japanese scientists have actually discovered a way to create edible steaks from human feces.

    Mitsuyuki Ikeda, a researcher from the Okayama Laboratory, has developed steaks based on proteins from human excrement. Tokyo Sewage approached the scientist because of an overabundance of sewage mud. They asked him to explore the possible uses of the sewage and Ikeda found that the mud contained a great deal of protein because of all the bacteria.

    The researchers then extracted those proteins, combined them with a reaction enhancer and put it in an exploder which created the artificial steak. The “meat” is 63% proteins, 25% carbohydrates, 3% lipids and 9% minerals. The researchers color the poop meat red with food coloring and enhance the flavor with soy protein. Initial tests have people saying it even tastes like beef.

    Inhabitat notes that “the meatpacking industry causes 18 percent of our greenhouse gas emissions, mostly due to the release of methane from animals.” Livestock also consume huge amounts of resources and space in efforts to feed ourselves as well as the controversy over cruelty to animals. Ikeda’s recycled poop burger would reduce waste and emissions, not to mention obliterating Dante’s circle for gluttons.

    The scientists hope to price it the same as actual meat, but at the moment the excrement steaks are ten to twenty times the price they should be thanks to the cost of research. Professor Ikeda understands the psychological barriers that need to be surmounted knowing that your food is made from human feces. They hope that once the research is complete, people will be able to overlook that ugly detail in favor of perks like environmental responsibility, cost and the fact that the meat will have fewer calories.

    Waste not; want not.



    And I hope this will shut up you members of the Congregation who have been pitching a fit with the finance committee about my expense account on all those Missionary Trips I take over to the chinks. I need that money! Do you think Jesus wants me to eat jap poo-poo!?
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
  • Jack O'fagan
    With faith as immovable as the Earth
    True Christian™
    • Feb 2011
    • 4836

    #2
    Re: Jap Scientists Make "Food" Out of Feces!

    That is just so wrong. If you are going to make food out of human poop it should be barley cakes,

    "And thou shalt eat it as
    barley cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man, in their
    sight. And the LORD said, Even thus shall the children of Israel eat their defiled
    bread among the Gentiles, whither I will drive them."
    (Ezekiel
    4:12-13)"

    YiC

    Jack
    Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.

    sigpic

    I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.

    Comment

    • Talitha
      Deaconess
      Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
      True Christian™
      • Nov 2025
      • 15118

      #3
      Re: Jap Scientists Make "Food" Out of Feces!

      Food out of human poo! They serve it in high priced chop suey houses! And they eat it!
      I hadn't realised that this was news

      Sister Talitha

      Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


      HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
      being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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