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  • WilliamJenningsBryan
    True Christian™
     
    • Jan 2007
    • 9384

    #1

    Jesus Strikes Down Lady Gaga

    Praise Jesus that something finally has been done to stop the insufferable talentless caterwauling from this tenth-rate cultural icon. Maybe we will also henceforth be spared this attention whore's visage of a Justin Bieber with a sex change operation look alike.

    Lady Gaga cancels world tour to have surgery on hip
    Fears for star's career following injury
    By ALEX WEST
    Last Updated: 14th February 2013

    LADY Gaga has been hit by a crippling illness which could end her stage career.

    The US singer last night cancelled the rest of her world tour after she was left unable to walk due to synovitis — a chronic condition which causes joints to swell.

    Gaga, 26, had tried to hide her agony from staff, but she was in such pain she could no longer perform. Now she has pulled out of the remaining 21 dates of her Born This Way Ball tour.

    She blamed a tear in her right hip — an underlying cause of synovitis — which will need surgery to repair.

    Gaga told her 34 million Twitter fans: “I’ve been hiding a show injury and chronic pain for some time now and over the past month it has worsened.

    “I hid it from my staff, I didn’t want to disappoint my amazing fans.”

    Gaga was in extreme pain after her show in Montreal, Canada, on Monday.

    She added yesterday: “I could not walk — and still can’t.” Fans with tickets to the scrapped shows will get refunds, but she said of the cancellations: “I hope you forgive me, as it’s nearly impossible for me to forgive myself. I’m devastated.”

    Synovitis is linked to arthritis and auto-immune disorder Lupus — and regular bouts can lead to a crumbling of the joints.

    The singer has previously confessed to a history of “borderline lupus”. Her aunt Joanne died of it in 1974.


    Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
    brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
    ...and get off my lawn
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  • Pastor Isaac Peters
    Senior Pastor
    Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
    Always Biblically correct
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 10639

    #2
    Re: Jesus Strikes Down Lady Gaga

    Did "Lady" Gagme really think that she could fag-enable with impunity?

    Galatians 6:7-8: Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
    This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

    Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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    • Paragon of virtue
      Confirmed Enemy of God
      BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
      • Jan 2013
      • 547

      #3
      Re: Jesus Strikes Down Lady Gaga

      I think she locked when she was trying to pop. On a happy note I'm sure she'll be happy in Hell surrounded by all the little monsters...and medium sized monsters...and Great Big ONES like Satan himself...he'll be pokin' her face with his pitch fork.

      Comment

      • Zechariah Smyth
        Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
        True Christian™
        • Feb 2011
        • 15251

        #4
        Re: Jesus Strikes Down Lady Gaga

        Who?

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        • Pastor Ezekiel
          Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
           
          • Sep 2006
          • 78552

          #5
          Re: Jesus Strikes Down Lady Gaga

          I got my hopes up when I saw the headline. I thought Jesus had finally sent her to hell for being a fag-lover.

          You see, the Holy Bible says that homers (those "without natural affection") and their supporters (those "that have pleasure in them") are "worthy of death." Romans 1:31-32

          Romans 1:31 Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: 1:32 Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.
          Who Will Jesus Damn?

          Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

          Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

          Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

          Comment

          • Marshall
            Righteous and Patriotic
            Highest body count at the VFW
            True Christian™
            • Oct 2006
            • 3322

            #6
            Re: Jesus Strikes Down Lady Gaga

            I cant stand a pillow biter. Its certainly all over The Bible that God doesnt like them either and if it's good enough for God then why should I like them or care if God strikes down a gay enabler like "lady" gaga? Im not better than God, I dont have His wisdom or His understandings of the universe He created. Who am I to Him that I dare think against His WORD or His actions?

            He wants her gone and I agree with him.
            God bless America, the Second Amendment and the Constitution. God bless the United States Marine Corps and all who fight for Jesus in third world cess pools. God bless the GOP and all they stand for, Truth, Honesty and the American people. God bless Landover Baptist Church and all True Christians™ the world over. Curses to our Muslim President, his failure is our Salvation.

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