Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

[BrotherLarry]

Since Michael Hezekiah was my attorney at one time, his office in New York informed me this morning that they have not heard from him since his arrival in Papua. They called to inquire as to whether I had heard from him - which I have not.


While at this point it is entirely possible the Joo lawyer is traveling and doesn't have access to services in darkest New Guinea, his office is concerned since he made a promise to check in every day even while on vacation. Their attempts to reach him via social media have failed, and his phone immediately goes to voice mail, which is "full, and cannot take any messages at this time." One thing that seems rather strange is that his hotel room has not been entered since shortly after his arrival.


Has anyone here heard from him? If so, you are asked to let me know since I am very close to his Manhattan law office. Let us all pray that this turns out the way we want it to - with God's plan being fulfilled.

[Alvin Moss]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

The Negroes over in New Guinea enjoy eating people. I am not expert in the eating of people, but I expect that the white meat is preferred in people much in the same way that it is with the chicken and the turkey. Many might point out that your attorney is (was?) a Jew, but Jews are technically white and I doubt if the aborigines can tell one pale face from another. I believe that Mr. Hezekiah has likely been boiled in a pot and consumed.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

The Negroes over in New Guinea enjoy eating people. I am not expert in the eating of people, but I expect that the white meat is preferred in people much in the same way that it is with the chicken and the turkey. Many might point out that your attorney is (was?) a Jew, but Jews are technically white and I doubt if the aborigines can tell one pale face from another. I believe that Mr. Hezekiah has likely been boiled in a pot and consumed.

My Good Brother Alvin:


Thank you for your characteristically concerned and optimistic input. I shall pass this on to his colleagues whom will no doubt be touched by your outpouring of Christian love.


Yours respectfully,
BrotherLarry

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Let us all pray that this turns out the way we want it to - with God's plan being fulfilled.

I will certainly pray for that. I do sometimes wonder, though, about praying for God's plan to be fulfilled. I mean, God will fulfil His Own plan in His Own time and it seems both pointless and churlish to bother Him about it.

[handmaiden]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

The Negroes over in New Guinea enjoy eating people. I am not expert in the eating of people, but I expect that the white meat is preferred in people much in the same way that it is with the chicken and the turkey. Many might point out that your attorney is (was?) a Jew, but Jews are technically white and I doubt if the aborigines can tell one pale face from another. I believe that Mr. Hezekiah has likely been boiled in a pot and consumed.

Wait--would that be kosher?

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Wait--would that be kosher?

Would that be relevant, though? I don't think the tribesmen keep kosher, so they wouldn't care either way. And if by happenstance it was Mr Hezekiah who was doing the eating, it would very much depend on what religion he was professing on that particular day. The man does have "form" for what a crueller person than me might call opportunistic faith choices. Galatians 2:12-14.

[Thomas Taylor]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Brother Larry,

Immediately upon reading your post I called my good friend Kovai in Four Mile. He has informed me that he had nothing to do with anything and knows nothing about anything. He has stated that he met Mike and they went for a bracing walk after dark on his first night there. He dropped him back to the hotel and has not seen him since. He also states that he has many witnesses that will swear that he has had absolutely nothing to do with, as he calls him, Long Pig Mike's disappearance.

YIC
TT

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Thank you Tommy. I know JUST how trustworthy your sources are. My latest information is that there is an announcement to be made shortly and they mentioned the Raskols (weren't they a 60's band?).


I've been so caught up with finals and waiting to hear from Brother Elmer that my mind has been rather occupied. I know everyone is praying for the best outcome.

[Sister Rebecca]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

The Negroes over in New Guinea enjoy eating people. I am not expert in the eating of people, but I expect that the white meat is preferred in people much in the same way that it is with the chicken and the turkey. Many might point out that your attorney is (was?) a Jew, but Jews are technically white and I doubt if the aborigines can tell one pale face from another. I believe that Mr. Hezekiah has likely been boiled in a pot and consumed.

As I have been on Mission in New Guinea for a few years, I can tell you from personal experience. There is NO white meat on a negro. The very term "negro" negates your white mean supposition. And Jews are not white meat either. They are Pork. Dirty and foul and not fit for dinner table discussion, much less ON the dinner table.

As to Michael Hezekiah's disappearance. well, it takes a good 3 or 4 weeks to get over the foul bowel-twisting and headache-wringing nausea that drinking New Guinea water brings on. He's probably just shut up in his own bathroom for the time being. Give him some time before sending in the US Army after him.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

The hotel room has been searched and there is no sign of him. I am placing it in God's Hands, believing that the will of the Lord will be done. I'm sure everything is ok.


It's just so unlike a Joo to keep their mouths shut, though.

[Thomas Taylor]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Kovai has informed me that, apparently, our dear friend Mike "The Long Pig" was seen in the company of a certain Mr. Omsy. Word on the street is that Omsy is a bit of a rake and enjoys keeping foreigners company. Kovai says it is possible that they could have gone up country to see the sights.


If I hear anything else I will update you all with it.


Mike might have been an uppity Joo, but he was our uppity Joo. I hope and pray that nothing untoward has happened to him.


YIC
TT

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Perhaps Mr. Hezekiah was accompanied by his biological father? That would explain the disappearance. Among the savages whose only pleasure is cannibalism, the God-sanctions mutual consumption of one another could have taken place.

Ezekiel 5:10
Therefore the fathers shall eat the sons in the midst of thee, and the sons shall eat their fathers; and I will execute judgments in thee, and the whole remnant of thee will I scatter into all the winds.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Can someone explain why anyone here even cares what has happened to this very ill-mannered man?

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

Can someone explain why anyone here even cares what has happened to this very ill-mannered man?

Because, Sister, it is the right and proper thing to do.


For example, I don't always like my mother's attitude. She is an arrogant, papist, meddling wench. I still care what happens to her and her last will/testament. My father is sometimes rude, still worships the romanist idols, and lets some woman manage one of his car dealerships, but I still care what happens to him and his money.


There were, indeed, times when Mike was a mouthy, instigating and insufferable pile of Joo garbage. But he fought for me legally, cared about me personally, and sometimes called me his Bubbalah. So I care about what happens to him.


Just because you didn't give a rat's behind about the darling Attila's Wife doesn't mean we are all able to just cast people aside. As a True Christian(TM) male, I lovingly rebuke you and your nosey husband who always has something to say about what I say.


In the joy of our Lord,
BrotherLarry


And I am just waiting for the reply which says, "I spoke to my husband about this and he said..." BLAH BLAH BLAH I am taking my blanket to my prayer closet and staying there for three hours.

[Thomas Taylor]

Re: Important News RE: Michael Hezekiah

I have just received word of Mike from Omsy, who has now returned to Four Mile. He has said that Mike found out about a lost tribe of Joos, called the Gogodala, in the west of the country. Omsy took him as far as he could before handing him over to his next guide.


Omsy has sworn that Mike was in one piece when he left him. Omsy has sent a photo of the guides but has said that Mike was indisposed when it was taken.




I will update you all as the situation develops.


YIC
TT