[James Dewitt]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

Your Honor, Mayor JJ Hold. I ask that you give this some thought before construction starts. Do you really want to get the women of Freehold driving in a roundabout? Think about it, if you get two or more of the dang females in a car running their mouths they could be stuck going around in circles for hours. I for see many angry phone calls from men who's dinner is not on the table due to the fact that their wives can not figure out how to get off the roundabout. I urge you Mayor think about future elections.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

Mr. Dewitt--Your concerns are very valid. Only yesterday, I saw woman driving with one hand while drying her fingernail polish out the window with the other. How dangerous it would have been if she had been navigating a roundabout.

The problem is that the Federal Government is phasing out stop lights in favor of these things. And, it represents an opportunity to place Christian marketing icons on public property.

I'm giving serious consideration of your concerns, however.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

The problem is that the Federal Government is phasing out stop lights in favor of these things. And, it represents an opportunity to place Christian marketing icons on public property.

I'm giving serious consideration of your concerns, however.

You mean Osamba's government don't you? It figures they just go in circles too! Osamba reminds me of a dog chasing his own tail, no matter how fast he runs, he can't quite catch it.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

Obama's government, that is correct. The Obama system is to hand out lots of money and tell us in local government how to do things.

In the case of Freehold, located in the heart of the cornbelt, we can expect the roundabouts to be clogged with tractors, wagons, pickups and combines. Add to that women drivers and, well, makes one wonder.

[Paul Jeffery]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

Your Honor, I think I'll get on board with Brother Dewitt and suggest that roundabouts, while they may eventually be what it takes to be compliant with federal statutes, will just spell late meals and fewer pies. This statue I have offered to donate, until such time as Freehold is forced to eliminate the stoplights and build the roundabouts,
might be best kept in storage until the roundabouts are required. I was thinking, maybe it could be stored in Pastor Ezekiel's yard right next to (but facing away from) his Buddha statue?

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

I understand your thoughts and appreciate your offer.

Currently, I taking proposals for commission of a large statue of Pastor Deacon Fred, and, perhaps other Pastors. Each could be smiling and projecting a warm Christian greeting to the people bumping into each other in the roundabouts.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

I understand your thoughts and appreciate your offer.

Currently, I taking proposals for commission of a large statue of Pastor Deacon Fred, and, perhaps other Pastors. Each could be smiling and projecting a warm Christian greeting to the people bumping into each other in the roundabouts.

I have several suggestions for which I am certain funding could be found.

Even extra funding.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

Thank you, Pastor Zeke. God Bless You.

The staff working on this project has sworn me to secrecy. Nevertheless, I can say just a bit about the survey done to determine the Pastors to be immortalized in this roundabout art.

I can only say, I hope you will have some time in the comming months for a little "modeling session". Oh, and be thinking of something to wear that will not look to dated in a hundred years.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

While the thought of a 30foot tall likeness of a unnamed Pastor in the middle of a roundabout sounds great. Again Mayor do you want simple minded women navigating this? If Sister Palin can build a bridge to no where why cant we?

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Notice: Request for Roundabout Art

While the thought of a 30foot tall likeness of a unnamed Pastor in the middle of a roundabout sounds great. Again Mayor do you want simple minded women navigating this? If Sister Palin can build a bridge to no where why cant we?

Your points, as always, Mr. DeWitt, are well taken. I always thought Gov. Palin's "Bridge to Nowhere" was a rather nice accomplishment.

Your diagram of a roundabout raised another concern. We must plan the roundabouts so, when they are seen by air, do not present some unseamly profile.

For example, we do not want a roundabout, as seen from the air, to present the profile of a woman in a compromising posture. Nor, for that matter, do we want it to appear as a male with a very large tallywacker.