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  • Johny Joe Hold
    Mayor of Freehold
     
    • Feb 2010
    • 12470
    #1

    Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

    Periodic Report to Citizens:

    Being the CEO of our City is not without its difficult moments. Yesterday, I filed a Disciplinary Report for City Hall Receptionist, Level III, Tiffany Bjornsonn. I think the text of my report is self explanatory and it is not necessary to go into background details:

    DESCRIPTION OF INFRACTION:

    There are two documented infractions. (1.) Supervisors, taking attendence notes at Landover Baptist Church, did not record observing Miss Bjornsonn for two Sundays in February, the 16th and 23rd. When asked about her absence, she said a boyfriend was in town, she didn't feel up to attending church and did not know it was expected of her.

    (2.) Miss Bjornsonn has never been observed praying before her brown bag lunch in the city break room. When asked about this, she expressed the opinion it is not necessary to say grace before brown bag lunches.

    DISCIPLINARY MEASURES TAKEN:

    Miss Bjornsonn will be suspended for two days in March without pay. I recommend a probationary period of two months thereafter with the expectation these shortcomings have been addressed.

    END OF REPORT.

    All the best to you, my favorite citizens, for an early Spring with all the joy is brings.

    Johny Joe Hold
    Mayor
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
    Tags: None
    • Faith_Machine
      Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
      True Christian™
      • Mar 2011
      • 10049
      #2
      Re: Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

      Thank you, Mayor Joe Hold. It's a little disturbing that somebody like Tiffany has access to all the city records and whatnot, but I'm glad for your complete transparency in city governance.
      WARNING:
      In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
      REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

        Comment

        • Mary Etheldreda
          Gushing for Jesus
           
          • Sep 2011
          • 23775
          #3
          Re: Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

          Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
          Thank you, Mayor Joe Hold. It's a little disturbing that somebody like Tiffany has access to all the city records and whatnot, but I'm glad for your complete transparency in city governance.
          Indeed, Brother F_M, Thank You Mayor! I, for one, am grateful for the patriarchal care extended over our sweet town. Family, church, and state are institutions parallel to the image of God and the gender roles He designed, each with real authority in its ordained sphere. As the keeper of the keys of Christ’s kingdom, the church is the central and defining institution of history. There is no living church that takes this roll more seriously than Landover Baptist Church (Matthew 16:19; 18:18; Acts 4:19; 5:29; 25:11; Hebrews 13:17; 1 Peter 2:13; Ephesians 1:22-23; 1 Timothy 3:15).
          Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

            Comment

            • Jedediah
              True Christian™ Creation Scientist
              Fisher of Men
              True Christian™
              • Feb 2010
              • 6824
              #4
              Re: Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

              Originally posted by Johny Joe Hold View Post
              When asked about her absence, she said a boyfriend was in town, she didn't feel up to attending church and did not know it was expected of her.
              This is outrageous. Does she think Jesus got nailed to a cross and died because He "felt" like it? No. It is because of her inherently sinful nature that God was forced to kill Himself (temporarily) so that we may all be covered in His Blood so that when He looks at us, He is not offended by our sin, which we are born into because a stupid woman (Eve) just had to eat the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. What is it with these smart-mouthed women and their feelings anyways? It's women's fault that Jesus had to die like He did anyways. If regular church attendance and being second-class citizens is the worst they get, women are still getting off way easier than they deserve.

              I Timothy 2:13-14
              For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
              And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.
              II Thessalonians 1:7-9
              And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
              In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
              Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power
              The man who is being progressively sanctified will inescapably sanctify his home, school, politics, economics, science, and all things else by understanding and interpreting all things in terms of the Word of God and by bringing all things under the Dominion of Christ the King. -R.J. Rushdoony

                Comment

                • Faith_Machine
                  Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
                  True Christian™
                  • Mar 2011
                  • 10049
                  #5
                  Re: Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

                  Just a little "heads up," Mr. Mayor, I know a girl who's in Tiffany Bjornsonn's Zumba dancing* class, and she tells me Tiffany's boyfriend Kwame (I hope I'm spelling that right) is a paralegal for some big shot civil rights attorney, and he told her that you can't legally require an employee to attend church or pray.

                  So just be prepared for the possibility of her making waves, that's all I'm saying.


                  *Before you ask, the answer is NO, there is no Zumba dancing taking place within Freehold's city limits. She drives over to Coon Rapids for her Zumba classes. You know what people are like in Coon Rapids.
                  WARNING:
                  In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                  REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                    Comment

                    • Pastor Ezekiel
                      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                       
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 78552
                      #6
                      Re: Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

                      That little harlot has been giving me the eye ever since she got hired. Better send her to my private pastoral study tonight about 11. I want to get something straight between us.
                      Who Will Jesus Damn?

                      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • Johny Joe Hold
                          Mayor of Freehold
                           
                          • Feb 2010
                          • 12470
                          #7
                          Re: Transparency Report: Freehold City Hall Receptionist Disciplined.

                          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                          That little harlot has been giving me the eye ever since she got hired. Better send her to my private pastoral study tonight about 11. I want to get something straight between us.
                          Will do, Pastor Zeke. Always helping those with needs, you're the greatest.
                          Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

                            Comment

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