Wear a muu muu for Jesus

[BrotherLarry]

Ladies, especially women of means, are asked to wear muu muus to church until Easter to celebrate the mission to China to help ravaged chinks fight against the corona virus.

Why muu muus? It’s only natural that Hawaii was chosen for the closest location to The virus so we are celebrating the Hawaiian garb to commemorate our fight. But there’s more! Each woman has to tithe $1000.00 for the “right” to wear the muu muu to church. Special tithe lines have been set up for you to make the tithes quick and simple. These will go directly to my efforts to tirelessly save China from extinction. This has not been cleared for Landover yet but we don’t anticipate problems so go ahead and contact me privately to make your donations. We will also accept real estate, jewels, gold, and those other valuables taking up space in your closet. Hurry!!!!!!!

[handmaiden]

Re: Wear a muu muu for Jesus

BrotherLarry, I have just under a $1000 in my bank account and my rent is due in a couple of weeks. (It is just under a $1000.) Can I pay partial installments in order to receive an Easter muu muu?

I know that the time is coming soon when The Lord blesses me with abundance and wealth beyond my dreams and I will no longer have to live on $100 a month. Right now I am cash poor but very rich in faith.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Wear a muu muu for Jesus

I'm sorry, Larry dear, but my husband wouldn't allow me to wear native dress - even if I wanted to, which obviously I don't. Also, I think the other Ladies should be warned that these items are mostly made of polyester.

This has not been cleared for Landover yet but we don’t anticipate problems so go ahead and contact me privately to make your donations. We will also accept real estate, jewels, gold, and those other valuables taking up space in your closet. Hurry!!!!!!!

Let me know when it has been cleared and, in the spirit of True Christian™ generosity, Matthew will be more than happy to transfer the last of our Jaywick Sands properties to you.





(You will, of course, need to evict the tenants.)

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Wear a muu muu for Jesus

Faithful and Godly Sister Joanna

Clearance for the wearing of the muu muus was given by Jesus in a dream of a vision where a burning bush appeared to me and spake softly into mine ear. If all of you will research the muu muu it was and is often used as formal garb for weddings and other occasions. Only the ugly Americans gave it a bad reputation but in Hawaii it still holds the respect it always has.

I so missed the boys in Oahu. I am sending them a special speedo with their names embroidered and a gift for Hannah too: her own lei making kit! Love to all.

[Isabella White]

Re: Wear a muu muu for Jesus

Oh, my goodness, my dear Great-Grandbaby Brother Larry! I'm afraid that I'm unsure as to my participation in this project, as well-intentioned as it may be. It's not that I don't want to help out, Dear, but it's just, well, I do find muu muus are just a bit unbecoming, especially when one strives to dress in a style that is suitable for a woman of my age. Not only that, but as our beloved Sister Joanna has so kindly noted, they are often made of polyester (a rather undignified fake material), and I prefer silken fabrics. Furthermore, I don't wear a muu muu (or caftan, as they're sometimes called) even around the house. I consider them to be garish and "sloppy". As a ambassador of the , I do feel that I have a great responsibility to look my best, at all times.

II Timothy 2:9 " In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel".

You see, Dear, I strive to be always as presentable as possible, as one never knows when the door chimes will announce that a visitor has arrived. And if it should be a caller who is seeking the , then I must always make an excellent impression when answering the door.

However, I am more than happy to help you with a check to further your cause -- unless, of course, it means that I am obligated to wear the muu muu. Please let me know -- at your earliest convenience -- if I should cancel sending my donation.

And to you, I send my love, as always, dear Great-Grandbaby Brother Larry.

[BrotherLarry]

Re: Wear a muu muu for Jesus

Dearest Great Granny

The devil would rejoice if you stopped your financial blessings to my Gospel Ministry. I have a simple solution. Just add me to the authorized users at your bank and then you won’t have to lift a finger to help me. Let’s get this done soon sweetie so you and I have a clear plan for the future.