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  • Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

    If You See Your Kids Sitting In THIS Position, Stop Them!



    Children like to sit around while doing things, and since they’re learning, they tend to sit in whatever position is easiest and most convenient for them. Recently, the U.S. Department of Family Values have noticed that particular position, the go-to position for children, can actually be extremely harmful to them in later life. This position is often referred to as the “W” sitting position, as the fanning out of the legs creates a W.

    This position is extremely common for children due to the stability it provides. Since their legs are fanned out, they are given a significant amount of support with the least amount of effort possible. Unfortunately, it comes with many potential problems. These problems include, but are not limited to, thigh gap (no, you really don’t want your daughter to look like this), muscular dystrophy, cerebral palsy, and other serious mobility problems.

    At a first glance, the W position might look like a harmless yoga pose. The extreme twisting and bending of the hip joints are actually a type of silent masturbation. There is solid Scriptural support for the danger of this.

    Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
    Hebrews 13:4

    If you ever see your kids sitting in the W position, spank him immediately!

    Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
    Proverbs 23:13

    Muscular dystrophy is fatal. Imagine what will happen if this happens to 1 kid in 88 just like autism, thanks to the trendy W position. The U.S. population is 322,583,006, and 1/88 of that is 3.67 millions. Almost four MILLION lives are at risk. And liberals got upset by a handful of illegals blowing up if we mine the Mexican border.

    sigpicCorporal Punishment Advisor, U.S. Department of Family Values
    Cyber-bullying Instructor, Christian Commission on Human Rights
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    Higgs field theory disproved - Universe is a cotton field
    Viagra forces man to have his penis amputated

  • #2
    Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

    Thank you for alerting us to this new trend. I've always instructed my children to sit like proper ladies and gentlemen, no child-like behavior around here. I'll be damned if any Etheldreda children think the new autistic fad is worth trying out.

    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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    • #3
      Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

      I taught my children better than to sit in that bad-mannered slutty position! Whenever they would sit in that horrible position, I gave them my husband's belt! It's a shame the liebral media is saying that what I've been teaching them is all wrong.
      Proverbs 3:5
      Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

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      • #4
        Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

        Of course, the liebrals want to sin. Satan is just getting desperate. Thanks for letting me know; I will ensure my two little boys will not behave in such a fashion.
        "Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1

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        • #5
          Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

          I don't see why children should be allowed to sit at all. A sitting child is a lazy child and all lazy children will burn in Hell (Romans 12:11, Proverbs 26:15, Proverbs 12:24). A sitting child is also hard to kick in their behind when they misbehave which is like all the time. So kick your sitting child in the head until they figure out only Clinton voters are lazily sitting around waiting for handouts.
          5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
          To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
          James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

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          • #6
            Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

            My children never sit down because they are thoroughly spanked daily.

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            • #7
              Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

              I did not know children were ever allowed to use the "W" position. I have instructed the Principals at Freehold Public Schools to punish children who sit in that position.
              Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

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              • #8
                Re: Don't let your kids sit in the “W” position!

                Originally posted by Grandma View Post
                I taught my children better than to sit in that bad-mannered slutty position! Whenever they would sit in that horrible position, I gave them my husband's belt! It's a shame the liebral media is saying that what I've been teaching them is all wrong.
                Slutty indeed Grandma - it's also known as the "riding" position. Disgusting.
                Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
                brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
                ...and get off my lawn
                sigpic

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