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Old 01-19-2007, 04:04 PM
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Default Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

Dear Little UnSaved Racists (who come onto our Godly Forum spewing hate speech):

We at Landover Baptist Church do not follow your bigoted ways. Unlike you, we do not refer to colored folk with derogatory terms. Instead, we use LBC/God-approved language, such as:

Colored person/folk
Darkie
Descendant of Ham (LOOK IT UP, it's in Genesis)
Canaanite (LOOK IT UP, it's in Genesis)
Negro/Negress
Nigra/Nigress

The latter two are always capitalized, as they are proper terms for the Negroid race (much as Caucasian is the proper term for Godly White Folk).

We do not use the gutter slang word, "nigger", except in context to rebuke bigots like yourselves.

After several hours in deep prayer with Brother Love's good friend Deacon J. Daniels, a solution for this most vexing problem was revealed to me in a vision.

Jesus has decided that the use of this word has been deemed so awful, and so wrong, that anyone (who is not Saved or at least using it in the proper context of rebuking racist heathens) that mutters this word is automatically banned for 7 days!

Having unquestioning faith in Jesus, I have no doubt that this will help remove these evil people who have no desire to learn about God and Jesus from our midst.

Indeed, it is a shame that these heathens cannot realize that we are only here to share the unvarnished Truth about God's Word, and who God and Jesus are as described in God's Word (the KJV1611). Perhaps if they were to read their Bibles instead of spending all their time chatting online, they'd learn something about God.

Instead, they prefer to listen to Pastor Feelgood and his little snippets of happiness and joy! It's much easier to believe in a God and Jesus of your own design, who love everyone equally, than to learn about the real God and Jesus! The Bible tells us all about Him!

God hates sheep (and racist heathens).

Last edited by OnYourKnees; 01-19-2007 at 04:05 PM.
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Old 01-19-2007, 04:14 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

I think ALL Racists that use nasty words against Coloured folks or even Ex-Negras like our Brother Remy deserve a big fat PUNCH IN THE FACE from Jesus©.

Praise The Lord™ Brother On Your Knees for bringing this matter to The Board.
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Old 01-19-2007, 04:27 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

Such hate speech should never be tolerated!

As it's not a biblical term (kjv1611) I would never use it in polite conversation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by biblegateway.com
Sorry. No results found for "nigger" in Keyword Search.
Whereas Canaanite is used 68 times!

Praise Jesus that brother oyk is not niggardly and will stand up for what is right!

PRAISE JESUS!!!

YIC
V
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  #4  
Old 01-19-2007, 04:37 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
Dear Little UnSaved Racists (who come onto our Godly Forum spewing hate speech):

We at Landover Baptist Church do not follow your bigoted ways. Unlike you, we do not refer to colored folk with derogatory terms. Instead, we use LBC/God-approved language, such as:

Colored person/folk
Darkie
Descendant of Ham (LOOK IT UP, it's in Genesis)
Canaanite (LOOK IT UP, it's in Genesis)
Negro/Negress
Nigra/Nigress
Brother,

Don't forget "Niglet" for baby tarbabies.

Thank you for posting this wonderful information.

With love and compassion, Sister Thumper
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  #5  
Old 01-19-2007, 04:59 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

I shared this good news with my Nigress housekeeper and she was so excited she let out a mighty whoop and chucked her mop like a spear. It tapped my cup of coffee, sending the contents spilling onto the table so of course I had to fire her after she finished cleaning it up, but I'm sure her unSaved spirits were still soaring high knowing of this new rule.
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  #6  
Old 01-19-2007, 05:13 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
I shared this good news with my Nigress housekeeper and she was so excited she let out a mighty whoop and chucked her mop like a spear. It tapped my cup of coffee, sending the contents spilling onto the table so of course I had to fire her after she finished cleaning it up, but I'm sure her unSaved spirits were still soaring high knowing of this new rule.
Praise JESUS Sister Mary!

I bet she did a "jigaboo"!

Delighted, Sister Thumper
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  #7  
Old 01-19-2007, 05:25 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

What if one of those flappy-lipped jungle bunny's comes in here and starts calling us "cracker" and stuff like that. They should be punished too; not only the white people.

Dean
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  #8  
Old 01-19-2007, 05:29 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

AMEN Brother Deaner.

Everybody is always trying to bring Whitey down.

WE are the minority! White, Wealthy, Republicans are the Minority!

You don't see us sitting on our gigantic roll butts on our porches all day doing nothing like a Porch Monkey, now do ya.

With Love, Sister Thumper
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Last edited by BibleThumpinBlonde; 01-19-2007 at 05:35 PM.
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  #9  
Old 01-21-2007, 09:24 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus is Lord View Post
we are not afraid of a black president, as long as said president has repented of his pie-stealing, white woman raping ways.
Do i detect racism?
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Old 01-21-2007, 09:33 PM
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Default Re: Managing Racism - INSTABAN Feature

Quote:
Originally Posted by Peacekeeper View Post
Do i detect racism?
Unfortunately, yes. Some Negras just can't help themselves.
Why, only today I had an Apple pie cooling on my window sill and some damnable Darkie was seen by my Mexican Gardener running off with it screaming "Ah Stole ya Pie Honkie"

Jesus Weeps.
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HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is, being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


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