Jesus Gives His Left Arm to Warn Catlicks!

[Glendora Christianson]

Jesus Gives His Left Arm to Warn Catlicks! BUT WILL THEY LISTEN???!!! NO!

From a filthy secular rag:

The lightning bolt broke off one of Jesus' arms and a hand and damaged one of his feet, sending marble plummeting to the ground during a Saturday afternoon storm.

Don't look for any religious symbolism here - it was only a freak act of Mother Nature, says Sister Ilaria. (Are we really supposed to take the word of an idol worshipping sinner?)

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Jesus Gives His Left Arm to Warn Catlicks!

A Mexican't sees the face of Jesus in slice of toast, and Catlicks everywhere praise God, thinking He sent them a sign. But when God sends an actual sign, striking down an idol these false worshippers erected, they just laugh it off!
Praise Jesus I saw the light and got out of that cult before it was too late!

[Mrs. Rogers]

Re: Jesus Gives His Left Arm to Warn Catlicks!

Sister Bernadette was doing paperwork in her office when she heard the crackle of lightning.

The LORD has such perfect timing; sending lightning whilst the Catlick writhed on the floor and prayed to Mammon, rolling and thrashing around in dollar bills.