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  • Johny Joe Hold
    Mayor of Freehold
     
    • Feb 2010
    • 12890

    #1

    Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

    If there is one thing clear in the Bible, it is that nakedness will not be tolerated in Heaven. Proper clothing has been theme in Christianity ever since God created Adam.

    I get angry when I see depictions of angels wearing what look to me to be very thin gowns. If men can see through a gown, it is the same sin as if there were no gown. Angels wear proper robes, period.

    We don't see enough written about practical things like what is proper attire for heaven. I know you will enjoy reading this link:

    Ever since the first two people walked on earth, man has sought to clothe his body In the case of Adam and Eve, it was only after they sinned that they felt this need for clothing Then the eyes of ...
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
  • Billy Bob Jenkins
    Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
    About as Straight and Manly as you can get
    Hates anal sex. And trees.
    True Christian™
    • May 2010
    • 8337

    #2
    Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

    Certainly nothing that could entice a man into committing homorectal sins would be tolerated in Heaven, and that means anything that reveals the shape of a man. The following Youtube link discloses the sort of technology that will be necessary to prevent men from visualizing gay sex at a glance, a nanotech invisibility cloak:



    While the Japs are no doubt developing the invisibility cloak to work mischief, such as poisoning the Emperor's food, or snapping pictures of American military installations, they have inadvertently assisted Christian operations to thwart gay thinking, and cross-purposed unnatural functionality of the male anus. God has a plan for everything, even tricky jap games.
    The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!

    Comment

    • its_faith
      Forum Member
      Forum Member
      • Jun 2010
      • 292

      #3
      Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

      This is why dead people are dressed up when they are put in the casket.

      Comment

      • Nobar King
        Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
        Christ's Guardian
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2007
        • 23748

        #4
        Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

        I have to pack this crap, too?
        May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

        Comment

        • Daisy Mae Johnson
          The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
          Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
          aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 15708

          #5
          Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

          I'm for sure bringing my wedding dress. I'll need it for when I get married to !

          sigpic

          Tweet me Here
          My GODLY Bio Here

          Comment

          • Mary Etheldreda
            Gushing for Jesus
             
            • Sep 2011
            • 23775

            #6
            Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

            Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
            I'm for sure bringing my wedding dress. I'll need it for when I get married to !
            Amen, Sister!

            We'll be like Sister Wives in Heaven!
            Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

            Comment

            • Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson
              Forum Member
              Forum Member
              • Jun 2014
              • 1330

              #7
              Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

              Good idea, Sister Daisy! I'll bring mine with me; I can't wait to be the Bride of Christ, though for now, my own husband is a good, kind, and godly Pastor and a very good husband!
              "Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1

              Comment

              • Didymus Much
                Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
                • Jun 2010
                • 14079

                #8
                Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
                I'm for sure bringing my wedding dress. I'll need it for when I get married to !...
                It might as well get some use, huh?

                Comment

                • Holy Henry
                  Repenting ex-homer
                  Forum Member
                  • Mar 2014
                  • 116

                  #9
                  Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                  Originally posted by Didymus Much View Post
                  It might as well get some use, huh?
                  You disgusting atheist dog.

                  This isn't a forum for petty childish insults. I can't wait for you to split hell wide open.


                  In Christ!

                  Comment

                  • MitzaLizalor
                    Completely CRAZY for the Lord
                    True Christian™
                    • Sep 2010
                    • 14550

                    #10
                    Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                    Will undergarments be necessary?
                    Matthew 22:27-30 KJV
                    And last of all the woman died also. Therefore in the resurrection whose wife shall she be of the seven? for they all had her. Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God. For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven.
                    context

                    Comment

                    • Aholibah
                      Unsaved trash, eating grubs in a cave
                      • Mar 2015
                      • 24

                      #11
                      Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                      Originally posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
                      Will undergarments be necessary?
                      I never wear knickers anyway. Definitely a nice bra though, which will show me off to best advantage.
                      Ezekiel 23:16-17 And as soon as she saw them with her eyes, she doted upon them, and sent messengers unto them into Chaldea. And the Babylonians came to her into the bed of love, and they defiled her with their whoredom, and she was polluted with them, and her mind was alienated from them.

                      Comment

                      • Jim Farmer
                        True Christian™
                        True Christian™
                        • Sep 2014
                        • 2293

                        #12
                        Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                        Whore, what makes you think you're going to Heaven? Satan is going to have a great time with you!
                        sigpic

                        Comment

                        • Aholibah
                          Unsaved trash, eating grubs in a cave
                          • Mar 2015
                          • 24

                          #13
                          Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                          Originally posted by Jim Farmer View Post
                          Whore, what makes you think you're going to Heaven? Satan is going to have a great time with you!
                          Oops! Sorry, I forgot. That's what comes from spending too much time with good people like yourselves.
                          Ezekiel 23:16-17 And as soon as she saw them with her eyes, she doted upon them, and sent messengers unto them into Chaldea. And the Babylonians came to her into the bed of love, and they defiled her with their whoredom, and she was polluted with them, and her mind was alienated from them.

                          Comment

                          • Witch Hammer
                            True Christian™
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 1717

                            #14
                            Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                            Originally posted by Aholibah View Post
                            I never wear knickers anyway. Definitely a nice bra though, which will show me off to best advantage.
                            You can wear anything you fancy when you're scrubbing toilets in hell.

                            Comment

                            • Harsha Shah
                              Curry slurping demon
                               
                              • Aug 2014
                              • 321

                              #15
                              Re: Packing for Heaven: Here are the Clothes You Will Need.

                              Yes. Harsha Shah here. I am still a young woman but I am aware of my mortality. If my religion is right I will be re-born with no need for clothes, eh? Yes. No need. Maybe I shall be a baby naked and defenseless. But I have not been very good so maybe I'll be a cicada singing for an evening and then dying off for the next life. Maybe that is all we ever are. Yes. Beautiful but sad. And it is sad that I really do not believe that any more. Yes. I am thinking that as I pass the clothes will pass too.
                              "Ecclesiastes 3:7
                              A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."
                              Yes. Women are saving lives. It is time we are speaking! Yes!

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