This Day In History: January 6th, THREE KINGS DAY!

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

6 BC –Nothing happened. (If you believe wikipedia).

But we don't believe wikipedia, we believe the Bible, and the Bible says that today in 6 BC three wise men visited baby Jesus: Matthew 2:1–12

They are often called "three kings", based on a misinterpretation of Isaiah 60:3, Psalm 68:29, and Psalm 72:10. Obviously those verses say that it is the job of Christians to convert or conquer all nations so that all heads of state become devout Christians.

1492 – The Catholic Monarchs Ferdinand and Isabella enter Granada, completing the Reconquista.

FAKE HISTORY! Mexicans didn't conquer Grenada, Ronald Reagan did.

1540 – King Henry VIII of England marries Anne of Cleves.

Obviously chose her based on her name, guided by his boob-fetish. The UK has gone downhill ever since.

"Excuse me. EXCUSE ME! My horns of evil are UP HERE."

1721 – The Committee of Inquiry on the South Sea Bubble publishes its findings.

Typical liberal-bias economics - confused to find a bubble in the ocean.

1781 – In the Battle of Jersey, the British defeat the last attempt by France to invade Jersey

Their sacrifices were in vain: thanks to open borders New Jersey has been ruled by Italians ever since.

1912 – German geophysicist Alfred Wegener first presents his theory of continental drift.

Forever guaranteeing his doom in HELL. Creation Science proves that mountains were lovingly scrupled by the hands of the LORD.

1947 – Pan American Airlines becomes the first commercial airline to offer a round-the-world ticket.

An obvious case of fraud. A four corners of the Earth ticket would be a better name. I wonder if God will tolerate being mocked...

1960 – National Airlines Flight 2511 is destroyed in mid-air by a bomb, while en route from New York City to Miami. [no suspect or clues are found].

...Nope. GOD WILL NOT BE MOCKED.

1992 – President of Georgia [unpronouncable name] flees the country as a result of the military coup.

Interesting - I never heard of this. I thought Georgia was nothing but peaches, Ray Charles, and getting curbstomped by General Sherman.

2017 – The US Congress certifies Donald Trump winner of 2016 presidential election.

America becomes great again.

Holidays and observances

Epiphany or Three Kings' Day (Western Christianity)

Obvious why nobody celebrates this anymore. If three weird coots from Iran or worse show up and say they want to come in and give perfume to kids, we tell Gitmo to get a waterboarding room ready.

Armed Forces Day (Iraq)

Everybody celebrate by having your butt kicked. The Iraqi army makes the wimpiest Frenchman look like Le Rambo: In the last 3 decades they suffered the 3 most spectacular defeats in history:

[Sally Paulson]

Re: This Day In History: January 6th, THREE KINGS DAY!

If three weird coots from Iran or worse show up and say they want to come in and give perfume to kids, we tell Gitmo to get a waterboarding room ready.

What did they do? Commit plagiarism?

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: This Day In History: January 6th, THREE KINGS DAY!

Well, today I learned that our entire calendar system is a lie. Christ was born in 6BC, and died for our sins on Friday 3 April AD 33.

That means that we are in the 2019th day of....Nothing in particular. GOD HATES CALENDARS!

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: This Day In History: January 6th, THREE KINGS DAY!

Well, today I learned that our entire calendar system is a lie. Christ was born in 6BC

Really ? Christ was born 6 years before he was born? Clearly yet another miracle that indisputably proves our God is the only true God!

Luke 18:27
And he said, The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: This Day In History: January 6th, THREE KINGS DAY!

Well, today I learned that our entire calendar system is a lie. Christ was born in 6BC, and died for our sins on Friday 3 April AD 33.

That means that we are in the 2019th day of....Nothing in particular. GOD HATES CALENDARS!

I do hope this doesn't mean that you are going to abandon your This Day in History Series, Brother Jeb. I have been very much enjoying it.


The problem seems to be that we went from one calendar invented by a Roman (Julius Caesar) to another invented by a Bolognaise Pope (Gregory XIII). The latter was quite clearly a madman and I am told that the spaghetti sauce was named after the remnants from his unkempt beard:

I think at this stage we just have to work with what we've got, while bearing in mind that all years prior to 1753 are inaccurate and all dates after that are unreliable.

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: This Day In History: January 6th, THREE KINGS DAY!

What horrible man. I am just saying this because the of picture, I didn't actually read whatever you were nattering on about.

He is a traitor to all bearded men everywhere!