[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Today in Christ

June 17, 1963: The U.S. Supreme Court rules 8-1 that states cannot require the recitation of the Lord's Prayer or Bible verses in public schools.


A day which will live in infamy. And I guess we all know what happened after that: Sin and debauchery increased, hippies and communism were invented, nigras got to vote and women began to sass back. Until we abolish the activist (and unelected) Supreme Court, America will be burdened with skyrocketing sin. God's law is all we need.

Of course in Freehold, we don't have these problems. Prayer is mandatory here.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Today in Christ

June 10, 1692: Bridget Bishop becomes the first of 19 suspected witches hanged during the "Salem Witch Trials"

"...Although Bridget Bishop was a member in "full fellowship" of John Hale's church in Beverly, "her freedom from the austerity of Puritan manners, and disregard of conventional decorum in conversation and conduct brought her into disrepute." She was an easy target because of her flashy taste in dress, her smooth and flattering manner with men, and the questionable gaieties that had gone on in her tavern. Her typical costume was described as including a black cap, a black hat, and a red paragon bodice bordered and looped with many different colors -- a showy outfit for the times. She also possessed a great deal of laces about which her dyer, Samuel Shattuck, said "I always thought there was something questionable about the quality and style of those laces." He also said that some of them were so small he saw no practical use for them.

Another difference between Bridget and the typical Puritan wife was the number of husbands she had. Although a woman's remarriage after the death of a husband was common, Bridget was an exception because she had three husbands during the course of her lifetime. Her first husband was a man by the name of Wasselbe. After his death, she was married to Thomas Oliver from 1666 until his death in 1679. Before the witchcraft trials, Bridget had twice visited the county courts because of violent public quarreling with this husband. Her third husband, Edward Bishop, was one of the founders of Beverly Church and very respected in Salem Village. He was a sawyer (wood cutter) by trade. This was an indispensable occupation at the time and held high rank in the community. After she married Edward Bishop in 1685, the "old Oliver house" was torn down and a new one erected to rent to tenants.

For many years, Bridget (at the time Goody Oliver) had been under suspicion of witchcraft because of the accusations brought against her by Wonn, John Ingerson's Negro, who claimed that he saw her shape upon the beam of the hay house with an egg in her hand. Although she had been rumored as being a witch as far back as King Phillip's War, the real gossip about Goody Bishop began when she opened up a tavern in her new home on Ipswich Road. "Having already built up a long reputation for aggressive behavior in petty commercial transactions, Bridget soon turned the Bishop house into a place of late night conviviality where she sold cider manufactured from apples grown in her private orchard." This unlicensed tavern seems to have been a rendezvous for local youths and traveling sailors. It became a popular complaint that she permitted young people to loiter at unseemly hours playing "shovel board" and making an uproar that disturbed the sleep of the decent neighbors...."

Thank Jesus they hung that filthy pervert. She reminds me alot of Lilith now that I think of it....

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Today in Christ

May 20, 1277: Pope John XXI was killed by Jesus when his castle ceiling collapsed on him. Even his name was a mistake—there was never a John XX.

They were probably just in a hurry so they could get on with naming a Pope "Big" John XXX.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Today in Christ

May 28, 1954: President Dwight D. Eisenhower signs a bill adding the words "under God" to the Pledge of Allegiance.

Praise Jesus! What a glorious day to celebrate the obvious and intricate relationship between Christ and America. Glory!!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Today in Christ

May 20, 1277: Pope John XXI was killed by Jesus when his castle ceiling collapsed on him. Even his name was a mistake—there was never a John XX.


I apologize for the delay in posting this one. I've spent the last few days in uncontrollable laughter, and thankful prayers to Jesus for smiting another antiChrist.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Today in Christ

March 17

It was on this day, so very many years ago, that our Lord and Savior, after being mercilessly beaten and tortured and crucified and being dead for three days, then rising again to prove Scripture correct (praise Jesus!), ascended into the Heavens, to sit at the Right Hand of God the Father to await the day when He would gloriously return (any day now!).

After giving His glorious "Great Commission" commanding us to spread the Gospel to all nations (which the Democratic party has been resisting for the past 5 years, not to mention the years before that), the Glorious Ascension took place. With crowds our scientists can only estimate in the millions present, the Lord Jesus, smiling serenly, wearing silken white and beaming His Blue Eyes upon every person in attendance, began to rise into the perfectly blue Sky to sit at the His own Right Hand, the logistics of which are hotly under debate in the Landover University Philosophy Department.

After He disappeared into the clouds, two angels descended and told the multitudes gathering there that He would return in the same manner as He left, an event which is certain to happen in the very near future, praise Jesus!

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Today in Christ

May 14th, 1787

On this day so many years ago, our Founding Fathers loaded into their horse-drawn Escalades and other such Manly Vehicles of the day and made their way to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania with hopes of writing the first Constitution that would lay the foundations for One Nation under God.

Praise Jesus!

Praise Jesus, indeed! Fortuitous timing, brother!

I found a copy of this in the break room at the office today. Someone had taped this "nontract" to the copy of the Freehold Truth and Light which I'd brought in, covering a story about Godly GW Bush appointing judges who can strictly interpret the Constitution following its Christian foundations.

There's a fox in my henhouse, brothers.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Today in Christ

May 14th, 1787

On this day so many years ago, our Founding Fathers loaded into their horse-drawn Escalades and other such Manly Vehicles of the day and made their way to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania with hopes of writing the first Constitution that would lay the foundations for One Nation under God. Through the bitter cold and scorching heat, these brave heroes traveled, with one purpose in mind--to create a government that would never, NEVER, stray from its Godly roots. It would be based on the most significant Book ever written, the Bible. With the Honorable Enoch Jeremiah Smithe acting as God's Messenger to the United States, these brave men wrote a document that, to this day, is the most hated document in the world to all the godless scum that deface our planet. If it weren't for these Patriotic men, who knows where our country would be today. They valiently tried to stave off the Liberals, and have held them at bay for these past 200+ years! Praise Jesus!

[Bozo James (On Moderation)]

Re: Today in Christ

Halaleuia, Praise the Lordy! Evoloution, now we know the whole truth!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Today in Christ

May 5, 1925: Dayton, Tennessee, teacher John Scopes is arrested for teaching evolution in his classroom. (He volunteered to admit violating a recent statute prohibiting such teaching so that the law could be tested in court.) The resulting trial—the first "trial of the century"—led to public mockery of evilution and thousands turned to Christ.

Of course that monkey worshiper Scopes is going to spend eternity in hell being sodomized by every ape in satan's kingdom.

Praise Jesus!

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Today in Christ

In a long-awaited update to Today in Christ, I present to you the April 29th edition:

In 1862, the United States was slipping into a bloody Civil War, a war brought on by Northern aggression, where the democrats from the liberal northeast had taken it upon themselves to force the southern states to comply to their whim, no matter how ungodly and nonsensical it was. With the bigot Abraham Lincoln in charge, the country was so divided, in a way that has not been duplicated until recently. Battle after battle the vicious North won, using brutal tactics against the helpless southerners who were just trying to get their servants to raise a good crop to turn a modest profit. The liberal elitists, using weapons forged by Satan himself, fought against these innocent farmers, taking every advantage possible, even using propaganda to turn the blacks against their caring and philanthropic owners in a subversive plot to create havoc in the innocent south.

On April 29th, the Northern troops descended upon the quiet Christian town of New Orleans. The Northern troops, under the Admiral David Farragut, swooped down from the hills and destroyed the peace and quiet of this Christian city. In the confusion, the blacks left their cotton and tobacco fields and began to throw beads down upon the invading troops in a vain attempt to repel their attacks. Now, years later, this crazy holiday is celebrated by blacks and whites alike, in a sin-fest called "Mardi Gras", where immorality is worshipped. This so-called holiday is just an excuse for elitists to celebrate their "victory" over the moral and quiet people who once inhabited New Orleans before this tragic event. Ever since, very few Godly people have had the courage and bravery to enter the town, for fear of being driven out as they were so many years ago. Let us never forget this act of aggression of the North upon the poor Southern farmers and merchants.

[Virginia Day Templeton]

Re: Today in Christ



April 15, 1865: America is freed from four years of brutal tyranny under Abraham Lincoln by the heroic and selfless actions of John Wilkes Booth. Sadly, nothing could reverse the damage done during those years, as Lincoln had opened a Pandora's box that would eventually find white people enslaved by political correctness in a direct inversion of Scriptural commands. But for one explosive second, it all seemed right.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Today in Christ

History teaches us that the japs are completely incapable of defending Jesus when called upon to do so. Not to mention they're sneaky.

April 15, 1638: The castle of Hara, located on the Shimabara Peninsula, Japan, falls to invaders. Masuda Shiro Tokisada defended the fortress with 37,000 Christians, 17,000 of them combatants. They fought valiantly to the end—even the women and children. After the battle, all of the survivors were subsequently beheaded, save one Judas (Yamada) who had plotted to open the castle gate to the enemy.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Today in Christ

In a continuing edition of Today in Christ, I present to you today's edition, for March 21.

On March 21, 1800, the Roman Catholic "Church", in its neverending orgy of homosexual dressing and over-sensationalized pomp, committed a fashion faux-pas that makes me just cringe. The previous Pope, Pope Pius VI (as if a pope could be pious ) had been forced from his "high chair" by, of all people, the French "troops" (and here I was thinking that the French "army" couldn't whup a puppy -- but then again, their adversary was a man in a dress!). This left the Catholics in quite a bind! They had no pope, so who was going to play "God on earth" for their converts! The French troops were so violent that they even smashed up all of the valuable assets that the Catholic church had, including jewels, precious metals, and, most importantly, the Crown for the pope! How unlike the French: a military victory and ruining something fancy, all in one day!

Anyways, the Catholics decided that they needed a new person to play God, so they ran to the nearest bath-house and took the nearest man who wasn't currently playing "hide the sausage" with the local boy scouts and decided to name him their new pope -- Heaven forbid that they actually have to answer to God Almighty for awhile! Now anybody worth a hill of beans in this world can tell you how the Catholics never do anything without snazzy dresses and other such sparkly things that put the gays to shame, and this was no exception. However, without their crown and gems -- they were stuck! My friends, the Catholic church had to resort to the lowest of the low. They stooped to a level that the most devious sodomite wouldn't even THINK of touching. They crowned their new "God on Earth" with a............ papier-mache Tiara

I hope this is worth as good a laugh for you as it was for me -- I know for a fact that no Catholic worth his beans would admit to such a travesty! The next time you run across a catholic molesting a little boy, ask where HIS papier mache tiara is

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Today in Christ

Brothers and Sisters,

In this continuing saga of "This day in Hisstory", I present to you the installment for March 12, 2007 (the issues are pre-dated because we cannot be sure that the Rapture won't occur tomorrow).

March 12, 1912
On this day, nearly 100 years ago, feminism began to gain one of its strongest footholds in America. One uppity feminazi by the name of Juliette Gordon Low joined together with 18 of her fellow man-haters and created what she called the "Girl Guide" association, an association which is now known by its more popular, less threatening sounding "Girl Scouts of America". Although this should be surprising to none, the idea for this came from Europe, since Low was born in the United Kingdom (not of Christ, sadly).

Ever since its inception in 1912, this group has been forcing girls to act like men, throwing away their femininity and God-given role to be butch lesbians. Although this comes as no surprise to any Godly American, Hillary Clinton was herself a "Girl Scout", which is, I suspect, where she came to be such a communist nazi. From what this picture would indicate, it would seem that Hitlery could only pass the test at 57 when the rest of her "tropp" was around 10 years old



As any True Christian knows, this group encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft and become lesbians. No parent who truly loves their children would allow their daughter to associate herself with anyone in this group, much less join them!