[Jo Freddie]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

So you guys started a demonic holiday. What a shock.

No we started a Holiday of sweets for children and it got hijacked and given a different meaning.

In the same way that Yule a pagan midwinter religious festival observed by the Northern European peoples was hijacked by what started out as a jewish cult.

[WWJDnow]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

the first Pastafarians were peace-loving explorers and spreaders of goodwill, not bloodthirsty criminal Pirates. In fact, they were well known to distribute candy to passing children, thus establishing what is now known as Halloween.

So you guys started a demonic holiday. What a shock.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Pirates are unsaved, unwashed scum of the earth. Forget all those sickening queer-oriented Disney movies. Pirates are lower than gypsies.

The clip you show is clearly not of His Chosen People, who Our Lord gave to Sea to as the Promised Land, as the number of sea bandits off Somalia has increased Global Warming has not decreased.


Regardless of the lies told about them, the first Pastafarians were peace-loving explorers and spreaders of goodwill, not bloodthirsty criminal Pirates. In fact, they were well known to distribute candy to passing children, thus establishing what is now known as Halloween.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Pirates are unsaved, unwashed scum of the earth. Forget all those sickening queer-oriented Disney movies. Pirates are lower than gypsies.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

I wasn't going to read this but glanced over the yellow bit (obscured, nobody needs to read that again) blinking awkwardly where indicated, and that's where I stopped reading somewhat confused are you saying there's
BLUE sauce available in pasta heaven? That would be rather unusual is it a clothing optional venue.

It just sounds worse and worse every time I think about it.

There is whatever pasta and Sauce one desires, so unless you desire BLUE sauce there will not be any there for you.

could you please explain this symbol

Why that is the Pirate Fish, a most Holy symbol.
.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Originally Posted by Jo Freddie
THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER created the universe and a bunch of planets, including Earth. No one except Himself was around to see it, but we suspect it was rather dull. The initial creation, obviously, must have been spectacular, but He then spent the next ten to one hundred years painstakingly preparing the universe to appear older then it actually is. Photons were placed individually, en route to earth, ostensibly emitted millions of years ago from stars across the galaxy. In reality, we know that each proton was divinely placed and red-shifted (The universe appears to be expanding, much like cooked pasta, as illustrated by observed light from distant galaxies shifting toward the Marinara Spectrum

I wasn't going to read this but glanced over the yellow bit (obscured, nobody needs to read that again) blinking awkwardly where indicated, and that's where I stopped reading somewhat confused are you saying there's
BLUE

could you please explain this symbol
sauce available in pasta heaven?

That would be rather unusual is it a clothing optional venue.

It just sounds worse and worse every time I think about it.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Of course a person who has been taken in by a false religion such as the one you follow would be misguided enough to believe such a false hood

Only an idiot would think that.

The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good. - Psalms 14:1

Therefor, logically you are a fool. Jesus wins, again.

YIC

[Paragon of virtue]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

When I saw how old this thread was I was hoping that Jo Freddie's remains were found in a basement along with that witch's.

[Alterboy]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Wouldn't it be ironic if God smited them with gluten-intolerance or a wheat allergy? LOL!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Filthy godmocking scum!

[Piet Piraat]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Of course a person who has been taken in by a false religion such as the one you follow would be misguided enough to believe such a false hood

Ramen


this whole forum is proof of that...

[Jo Freddie]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Pasta aka noodles are satanic. The Pope worshiping Guidos swiped the noodle from the the chinks in Chinerland . Now we all know that Catliks are not Christian and the ornamentals are heathens at best. So God can not be a noodle.

Of course a person who has been taken in by a false religion such as the one you follow would be misguided enough to believe such a false hood

[James Dewitt]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

Pasta aka noodles are satanic. The Pope worshiping Guidos swiped the noodle from the the chinks in Chinerland . Now we all know that Catliks are not Christian and the ornamentals are heathens at best. So God can not be a noodle.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

We agree that most scientists are fools. But a Spaghetti strand and double meatball portion deity has no power to plant evidence like some dirty cop.

God alone is the True Cop and the True Judge and the True Warden. He has all the evidence that He needs to convict and incarcerate the human race. Jesus is our lawyer and He made a deal with the Judge who is His dad-- and Himself. He paid the fine for our misdeeds with His blood.

Sauce cannot cover your sins.

Spaghetti -- even my grandmother's -- cannot feed you soul.

Two meatballs is not enough for a growing boy.

Renounce the foolish doctrine of FSMism and accept the True Wisdom that is the Bible.

Or burn in hell.

Saucily Yours,
(but not in a blasphemous way)

Handmaiden

YET AGAIN you are confusing the foods that we prepare to honour Our Lord with the Lord Himself, a pate of Pasta is not our Lord, it just looks as close as humans can get to making something in the image of Our Lord.
The Lord himself is not actually made of earthly pasta meatballs and sauce, but his being will be made of some Holy Matter that we have no hope of ever fully understanding let alone reproducing. So we make pasta and noodles in his honour as this is the best we can hope to do.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster made the Earth, The Universe, and everything therein, so if scientists claim to have found something that pre-dates the act of creation the only explanation can be that the Flying Spaghetti Monster put it there for them to find or used His Noodly Appendages to alter their results so they come to that conclusion.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: A Condensed History of the World

As a True Italian, I cannot allow you to lecture me on the subject of sauce. With the many arrests, incarcerations --both in criminal justice and mental health facilities-- fires and wrecked automobiles in my family history, our grandmother's sauce was the one point of honor that could not be impugned.

I have no doubt that your family have made some excellent sauces over the years, but these are still not the same as the body of our Lord and Creator and can not have the same properties. The sauce is still only a food stuff that just looks like the mater that make up part of Our Lord.