[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Spanking IS God's Will!

If she is so Godly, why do you keep beating her?
O.K. There must be a reason... But if you keep her locked in the basement alll the time, so that she never leaves, why do you have to beat her?
Also, can't you afford a good chaperone?

None of that is any of your business.

You should be studying the Holy Bible instead of sticking your nose into other people's family affairs.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Spanking IS God's Will!

None of that is any of your business.

You should be studying the Holy Bible instead of sticking your nose into other people's family affairs.

If you're single and have a daughter, then I assume you must be widowed, since you would never get divorced. Tell me, did you beat your wife to death?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Spanking IS God's Will!

If you're single and have a daughter, then I assume you must be widowed, since you would never get divorced. Tell me, did you beat your wife to death?

The circumstances of my late wife's demise are also none of your business. Few members of my congregation know the full details......Thanks for re-opening a painful chapter of my life.

I may tell the story some time....It's still hard to talk about, all these years later.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Spanking IS God's Will!

The circumstances of my late wife's demise are also none of your business. Few members of my congregation know the full details......

Forensics team couldn't find enough pieces of the body to make a positve ID?
Clever Zeke.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Spanking IS God's Will!

I would just like to state that, while a man certainly has a responsibility to discipline his wife, sometimes it is okay to leave it in God's hands. When my ex-wife Ethel was finally executed for her whoredoms, it was not by my hands, but by the hands of unidentified Christian vigilantes doing the Lord's work. Try as I might, none of the classical methods seemed to purge her of her sinfulness. I tried putting a bowl of rats on her stomach and heating up the bowl until the rats started gnawing away at her abdomen. I tried putting a spike under her foot and tying her up by her thumb so that the confusion of whether to pull up or bear down would clear her mind of lesbian thoughts. I tried dismembering her sinful appendages, per the prescriptions of Jesus Christ. I tried searing the bottoms of her feet with an electric iron so that she would not be tempted to run away. Of course, she consented to all these things by taking marriage vows. In the end, only God, and a few well aimed stones, could heal the world of Ethel's sin. Praise His Holy Name!