[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

No I am not a tough guy on the internet or otherwise. However i do have an in built natural mechanism that compels me to act in given situations. This situation would be one of them, and I was just stating it as fact. I would defend a young girl in such a situation until i was physically unable to.

nice attempt at humor though, but there are much funnier images to be found on google that would have fit what you said.

So you admit that you can't control your murderous rages?

Sweet.



Maybe if you'd accept Jesus Christ into your life, things would get better. Not the "jesus" you currently have that is made up of bits and pieces of the NIV "bible" and songs you sang in Sunday School, but the 200-proof real McCoy.

Quit farting around, get a KJV Bible, start at Genesis 1:1 and end at Revelation 22:21. Even a borderline retard can get through it in a couple of months.

Get cracking! Don't skip any parts.

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth

[Bret Henderson]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

No I am not a tough guy on the internet or otherwise. However i do have an in built natural mechanism that compels me to act in given situations. This situation would be one of them, and I was just stating it as fact. I would defend a young girl in such a situation until i was physically unable to.

nice attempt at humor though, but there are much funnier images to be found on google that would have fit what you said.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

If i ever caught a man beating on a 14 year old girl i would bash him so bad that even the Lord would not recognize him.

[Bret Henderson]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

If i ever caught a man beating on a 14 year old girl i would bash him so bad that even the Lord would not recognize him.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

I think the problem here is that Capt. A. Portway is too nice for his wife. As we all know from Genesis 3, and Judges 16 women are seductive creatures who are not to be trusted. She needs to be beaten until she realizes her place is to be silent (1st Timothy 2:11-12) and to obey her husband (Ephesians 5:22-24).

I fail to see why women should be on the Internet at all. When my wife wants to talk to someone she can use here weekly 5 minutes of phone privilege for that. Assuming she flawlessly performed all her duties of course.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

f.a.o Mrs Aaron Portway

Mrs Portway I have noticed a couple of very undesirable types hanging around and I can see they're a bad influence on you. This "ThinksDesign" and "Fleur-de-lis" are only interested in one thing: SEEING YOU IN HELL.

Once they'd found a chink in your armour - and let's face it there were plenty to find - in they went! Now all I seem to be hearing from you is "me, me, me" why, just look at your user name! Mrs Naomi Portway (I've highlighted the offending word). Where is the respect due to your husband?

1 Corinthians 6:20 For yee are bought with a price: therefore glorifie God in your body, and in your spirit, which are Gods.
©1611

Childbearing is a serious business. I do not see that in you. You seem to think that life is for "fun" or something . That is why you're always complaining. Your mother must be so ashamed of you - and your poor father! You need to take a good look at yourself and remember WHY God arranged that childbearing should be so traumatic. So that you will remember the responsibility you bear for the disgusting state of the world, full of murder, lust, the zoophiliac plague we see all around us, false prophets, jihad, famine, disease, insanity, demon possession AND YOU SHOULD REMEMBER that through childbearing you may be redeemed (subject to complying with numerous other conditions).

I will quote God's word for you AGAIN:

I Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eue: And Adam was not deceiued, but the woman being deceiued was in the transgression: Notwithstanding she shall be saued in child-bearing,
. . . . . if
they continue in faith and charitie, and holinesse, with sobrietie.
©1611

Why, sometimes I don't even think you're frightened of your Husband!! Remember what God teaches us:

I Peter 3:1a-21 Likewise, ye wiues, be in subiection to your owne husbands.. While they beholde your chaste conuersation coupled with feare:
©1611

You need to remember the responsibilities you have now and before those two harpies start in with the "oh, Eve was so long ago you're not responsible for what she might have done" (they would be lying of course because neither of them even think that Eve existed in the first place) I will leave you with a couple of short passages from Job:

Job 14:1,4; 25:4
1 Man that is borne of a woman, is of few dayes, and full of trouble.
4 Who can bring a cleane thing out of an vncleane? not one.
25:4 How then can man bee iustified with God? or how can he be cleane that is borne of a woman?
©1611

It is bad enough that you are going to contaminate your father's grandson - just imagine how he will feel if you produce a girl! Perhaps if you need advice from one of the married ladies you could ask Mr Portway to contact them on your behalf. In the meantime I am not impressed with your lighthearted demeanour and cannot continue to be your friend. Please do not contact me.

[Kenny Ray]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

Just a quick update on the wife and my future son. On the plus side, the tests came back and she's officially got a bun in the oven!

On the minus side, all she does is barf, whine, and cry! I'm back to eating at the Landover Field Kountry Kitchen for most of my meals.

Wives, lemme tell you, can't live with 'em, can't live with them. Am I right?

Congratulations Captain Daddy!

(well I guess we should save the cigars for when your wife finishes the task at hand.)

So what is the due date? Any idea if it was a "first shot" success? If so - that would be fantastic news.

You know - if you will excuse me for saying - sometimes the good Lord might not bless a young lady with the best looks or the best memory... but they turn out to be more fertile than a barn full of bunnies! With God on your side - you might even be able to keep your little misses pregnant full time! I know it might not be easy with your flight schedule - but if God has blessed you with a "breeder" - then you have to try no?



YIC

Kenny Ray

[Kenny Ray]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

I'm sure that God's plan for many women does not involve getting pregnant.

You need life experience before you can bring up a child everybody knows that!

Turning women into baby factories is not God's plan.

ThinksDesign

You know - I'm figuring out why your posts are making me so angry. It is because you think you are as smart as a man. I mean, I think you really believe that! You are a woman. The sooner you accept that - the sooner you might be able to find a Christian™ man to lead you.

If you had half a brain, you would realize that God's plan is perfect just the way it is. You don't need to be second guessing it. A woman doesn't need experience. When a woman has experience - we have a word for that... whore.

You seem like you want to do good - but you have obviously been lied to by secular society so frequently - that you believe it is the truth. It is a form of brain washing. But you can truly cleanse yourself with the blood of Our Savior! Get right with God woman. The rest will flow.

YIC,

Kenny Ray

[Kenny Ray]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

You poor thing! You should not be giving birth at such a young age. You should be out doors playing with your friends and exploring God's creation!

God has a plan for all of us but there is no need to to rush into childbirth like this.

I hope you read this and can start to think independently. God gave everyone a brain to use (YES EVEN WOMEN!!!).

ThinksDesign.

YOU are a horrible person. I saw your nasty posts about the marriage too. Why can't you just be happy for them? I can only assume it is some sort of twisted envy.

If you get right with the Lord - maybe you will be able to find a man for yourself.

READ IT - IT HAS SAVED MY LIFE and it could save yours too!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

Of course it isn't. Nobody needs to turn women into baby factories. They are born that way.

Didn't Lady Gagme do a song about how she was born to be a baby factory?

[James Hutchins]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

Mrs. Portway, I wanted to let you know that there is not enough room for you at the Hutchins Fourth of July Spectacular. I feel so bad about it. Be sure to let Aaron know we do have a space for him(+1).

[Mrs. Naomi Portway]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

Aaron wanted me to post that the Beano is working a little and that I'm sorry that you all had to read about how gross I'm being. Im trying to do better and if I need to, I go out by the shed for a while so the house won't stink. My stomach still hurts alot but Aaron says thats Eves fault and that I just need to pray harder.

YIC

Naomi

[WWJDnow]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

Turning women into baby factories is not God's plan.

Of course it isn't. Nobody needs to turn women into baby factories. They are born that way.

[Fleur-de-lis]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

And any of that violates Holy Scripture exactly how?

If that pleases your god, then he is one twisted mofo.

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: I think God gave me a baby.

I feel sorry for Naomi. The poor child isn't even done growing herself, and is pregnant by a man old enough to be her grandfather, who expects her to be his body servant as well as a walking incubator.

What of it? That's what she was created for.

Genesis 2:18-23
18And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. 19And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. 20And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. 21And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

23And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

24Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. 25And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.