[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

I'd like to emphasize Godly product lines like Jimmy Dean, a little-known True Christian™ from back in the good old days...

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

Brother Hatchett, I don't know if this image falls under the category of this thread, but I was interested in your interpretation of it:

An injun riding a pig is disgusting, and "snapper" is slang for cooter. File this product under "b" for boycott. You don't want to know my interpretation of your spelling of my name.

Brother Hatchet, an old nemises of yours has been caught RED handed, imposing itself on an otherwise reasonable ladies cooking program...

Stellar work as usual, Pastor. Further evidence that McDonald's is trying to brainwash us. I am outraged and hungry for a McChicken.

[Nobar King]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

Sorry for my oversight. I, too, am disgusted by the OTHER Hatchett, and I will be more aware of the spelling difference from now on.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

No comment on this temptress sow or leering buck...

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

No comment on this temptress sow or leering buck...

Aunt Jemima is just how I like my Negroes--submissive and serving pancakes. And Uncle Ben seems like the type who wouldn't raise a fuss if he were thrashed for serving undercooked rice, not like that colored boy at Bob Evans last week.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

The Dutch Boy



One word: gay. Two more words: big time.

What on earth does the Dutch Boy advertise? Marijuana? Prostitutes?

That Chicken of the Sea mermaid alone has done incapable mischief here in Freehold among the young men. Going by the number of calls we get in church security being spiritually violated by that fish tailed succubus almost seems like a right of passage among young men. Even a good mother like Sister Bible Thumbing Blonde had deal with her own son being tempted by incest by proxy by that cartoon harlot.

Look at that knowing smile on that mermaid. She is mocking us!

And she encourages the development of human-animal hybrid fetuses.

One of the worst offenders is Peter Pan Peanut Butter. Now we all know what "Peter" stands for, but few are aware that "Pan" stands for the pan flute in the original character created by Scottish novelist and playwright J. M. Barrie.

Oh, I thought it was a direct reference to the ancient Greek goat-demon.

Brother Hatchett, I don't know if this image falls under the category of this thread, but I was interested in your interpretation of it:

Who thought it would be a good idea to advertise a product with a picture of MooHamMad?

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

The Scrubbing Bubbles Scrub Brush



This mascot "works hard so you don't have to." Well, guess what? I don't have to. My wife does. Strenuous chores keep housewives out of mischief, so cut the women's liberation crap, Scrubbing Bubbles Scrub Brush. Now I have to dirty more skivvies so she can make use of that extra hour of free time.

Also, I don't care for how this little deviant lurks in the shower.


Mr. Peanut



Spats. White gloves. Cane. Hand on his hip. We get it--he's gay. Mr. Peanut also looks like a tallywacker. Just for good measure, Planters gave him a monocle to create the effect of one eye, enhancing his resemblance to a tallywacker.

[Nobar King]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

Brewers Add Chorizo to Sausage Race
Milwaukee Brewers add chorizo, also known as 'El Picanre' and 'Cinco,' to popular sausage race


I imagine this is a popular event on 'gay day at the park', but not as popular with the lesbian crowd. Where are the running crabs?

[Pastor Rune Enoe]

Re: Chicken of the Sea Mermaid and Other Mascots That Offend Me



Let me direct your attention to one of our few success stories: Little Miss Coppertone - drawn by renowned Lezbian Joyce Ballantyne and thus incorporating lezbianism, pedophilia, zoophilia and sodomy.



However, the part that most disturbed the pastors was the detailed rendering of her derriere - a great and ample divide that might make any well-nourished plumber green with envy.

A few years ago, we therefore decided to send a crack team (if you'll pardon the expression) of lobbyists to the CEO of Schering-Plough HealthCare Products Inc. The result speaks for itself, the Miss Coppertone of the 21st Century has only one single buttock:



Who says it doesn't pay to complain?

[SUV]

Re: Chicken of the Sea Mermaid and Other Mascots That Offend Me



And just wait for the God-less athians to try to blame it on "Fundament-a-lism"

[Silent Wench]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

You are most certainly not. Nobody here wants to fornicate with you, fruitcake. Make one more lurid pass, and I will ban you just as surely as you enjoy Broadway musicals.

I don't understand what's wrong with Broadway Musicals. And what in the bloody hell is the fornication line about? I don't understand what's going on in here at all, I think.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Advertising Mascots That I Find Offensive

I don't understand what's wrong with Broadway Musicals. And what in the bloody hell is the fornication line about? I don't understand what's going on in here at all, I think.

Oh, if only you could live up to your name, you wouldn't write such foolishness. There are many things that could turn a young boy into a raging sissy - video games, comic books, Saturday morning cartoons, professional wrestling to name a few - but there are five things that are 100% guaranteed to turn a boy away from Jesus and into a sodomite bath house. Fashion design, floral arranging, hair styling, dancing, and Broadway musicals. There isn't a single real man in the world who could stomach watching trash like Cats or Rent, but sodomites swoon over these things and are the only people other than the butchest dykes who are willing to play the "male" parts in the abominations.

[Silent Wench]

Re: Chicken of the Sea Mermaid and Other Mascots That Offend Me

AHHHHH. I see now mate. It's ok for the gal folk to like the live show, though, right? I'm a "drama nerd" as it were.

[JennyD]

Re: Chicken of the Sea Mermaid and Other Mascots That Offend Me

What on earth does the Dutch Boy advertise? Marijuana? Prostitutes?

Lesbians, of course. Little Dutch boys like to stick their fingers in dykes.

And she encourages the development of human-animal hybrid fetuses.

Godly President Bush was right AGAIN!!

[Wide-Open]

Re: Chicken of the Sea Mermaid and Other Mascots That Offend Me

Lesbians, of course. Little Dutch boys like to stick their fingers in dykes.

That's supposedly to stop their flood.

The mermaid thing reminded me of this abomination:



You may have seen this before, but if that is not a giant throbbing tallywhacker pointed towards the little harlot I don't know what is.