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  • Jeb Stuart Thurmond
    Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
     
    • Jun 2007
    • 6574
    #16
    Re: Landover has ZERO TOLERANCE FOR CHILD ABUSE!

    Some tweets I got on Christmas, it hurt me so much it's taken me this long get over it enough to post:

    Originally posted by kids on twitter
    “I’m not trying to be a brat but my mom didn’t get me one thing I asked for and she got me an iPad. I don’t need this thing #areyouthinking,” @Shannskii420.

    “My parents are the worst mother [bleep-beep] parents in the world [bleep] you mom and dad for not getting me a Iphone. [bleep] you. FML. #Iphone,” @SeanMcmaster1.

    “My mum got me a really ugly 1D pillow how cringey is that – molly,” @narry_is_perf.

    “got a [bleep] TV I don’t even watch tv like really i wanted a [bleep-beep] iPad . but yet Jennifer gets a new laptop.! wtf [bleep] that!” @Zooniggah014.

    “Woahh didn’t even get headphones with my iPad,” @pratty109.

    “Just cried for like 2 hrs straight cause I didn’t get a car. #stubborn,” @vbellz_moriarty
    Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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      Comment

      • A mere mortal
        Unsaved trash
        Under Investigation
        • Aug 2013
        • 1
        #17
        Re: Landover has ZERO TOLERANCE FOR CHILD ABUSE!

        If you hit them with the rod and a arm falls off just tell them "it will grow back"

          Comment

          • Pastor Ezekiel
            Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
             
            • Sep 2006
            • 78556
            #18
            Re: Landover has ZERO TOLERANCE FOR CHILD ABUSE!

            Originally posted by A mere mortal View Post
            If you hit them with the rod and a arm falls off just tell them "it will grow back"
            Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

            And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

            I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.
            Who Will Jesus Damn?

            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

              Comment

              • Mary Etheldreda
                Gushing for Jesus
                 
                • Sep 2011
                • 23775
                #19
                Re: Landover has ZERO TOLERANCE FOR CHILD ABUSE!

                Originally posted by A mere mortal View Post
                If you hit them with the rod and a arm falls off just tell them "it will grow back"
                Hello, friend, and welcome to our forums! I wouldn't be too hasty in promising a child that. You may not have noticed, but the LORD is very particular about healing amputees. It's not nice to give a child false hope.

                Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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