X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • Mary Etheldreda
    Gushing for Jesus
     
    • Sep 2011
    • 23775
    #1

    Happy Birthday Jo Freddie!

    Happy Birthday Jo Freddie. I hope you turn your obsession for pasta to an obsession for Jesus! I pray you confess your sins and repent from your wayward ways, and avoid an eternity of Hell! There is no volcano of beer for you at the end, my dear. Only Heaven or Hell.

    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

    Tags: None
    • James Hutchins
      True Christian™
      Just a Regular Nice Guy
       
      • Jun 2009
      • 29457
      #2
      Re: Happy Birthday Jo Freddie!

      While I am no italian food fan and much prefer a Godly Steak, the True Christian(tm) in me compels a wish of happy birthday to you and a very long life so God does not have to deal with your hating ways.
      Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
      Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
      Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
      Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
      Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
      Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

        Comment

        • Granny June
          Office Temp and #1 Volunteer for Christ
          Forum Member
          • Jan 2015
          • 74
          #3
          Re: Happy Birthday Jo Freddie!

          "mr." joe freddie 's been nothing but trouble to this town and these god given-ammendment protected forums and i'm glad he's gone. always looking at you with those eyes and never a True Christian™ thing to say come h#ll or high water marks

          PS one more thing here, joe, you can wear this on your special b day:


          .
          .
          .

            Comment

            Previous template Next
            Working...