My Absence

[Hank Whitlock]

Im guessing many of you may have been wondering why I haven't been posting lately?

After learning my internet provider supports homo marriage I decided to buy my own internet service company. If you read my introduction forum you would know that at that time I owned a 300 acre farm in the Denver Colorado area, that has been passed down from generation to generation. Since Land in the heart of Denver sells for millions of dollars I was easily able to buy a internet company that is located in the state of Oklahoma. My family and I have just moved to Oklahoma glad to finally escape the majurana smoking homos.

I'm now officially the CEO of "Jesus Hates Homos internet services." Being a CEO of an internet company lets me do the Lords work in ways I would of never imagined. For example, all of my customers can't enter porno sites or anything sin related. Being an internet provider lets me have email addresses in which I send holy emails informing people that they are going to straight to hell if they don't start following Jesus.

I've been so busy with my new business that I haven't posted lately but now that everything's slowed down I'll start posting again.

~Hank Whitlock

[Elmer G. White]

Re: My Absence

Im guessing many of you may have been wondering why I haven't been posting lately?

After learning my internet provider supports homo marriage I decided to buy my own internet service company. If you read my introduction forum you would know that at that time I owned a 300 acre farm in the Denver Colorado area, that has been passed down from generation to generation. Since Land in the heart of Denver sells for millions of dollars I was easily able to buy a internet company that is located in the state of Oklahoma. My family and I have just moved to Oklahoma glad to finally escape the majurana smoking homos.

I'm now officially the CEO of "Jesus Hates Homos internet services." Being a CEO of an internet company lets me do the Lords work in ways I would of never imagined. For example, all of my customers can't enter porno sites or anything sin related. Being an internet provider lets me have email addresses in which I send holy emails informing people that they are going to straight to hell if they don't start following Jesus.

I've been so busy with my new business that I haven't posted lately but now that everything's slowed down I'll start posting again.

~Hank Whitlock

Welcome back, Mr. Whitlock,

A wise decision indeed based on your adventures. While it is quite possible to serve Sweet Jesus Christ Son of God our Savior in many ways, there is as far as we know, one and only one Church that gives its members a Truly™ Bible-based guarantee of a dwelling place in Heaven.

1 Peter 2:25
For ye were as sheep going astray; but are now returned unto the Shepherd and Bishop of your souls.

It is us, the Landover Baptist Church. Stay with us.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[James Hutchins]

Re: My Absence

Welcome back Mr. Whitlock though truth be told, I have no idea who you are. I have your file pulled from the Church office to take a gander at your background.