PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

[SUV]

I know Landover Baptist is All About the Bible And JESUS but people, there is something serious happening in the world today! Have you not been reading Godly CNN's headlines?

Britney's Cooter photos! Britney's friends saying that she needs an intervention! Britney shaving her head! Britney going into Rehab! Britney comining out of Rehab!

Certainly, I love Jesus as much as any of the rest of you do, but don't you think it's time we began being Concerned about Sister Britney also? Who is so blind as cannot see that she is a future Born-Again Christian in the making!!!

Ladies: For the first step in Sisterly Love, to show solidarity with our beleagured future Angel, I ask: Which end should we shave first? Perhaps Pastor can (again) advise.

Or perhaps Mrs. Betty Bowers could, but I Fear that she is once again, during this Winter Season, searching for Sinners on the French Riviera

[Talitha]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

I'm VERY concerned Sister Sue.
Miss Spears certainly need some True Christian™ guidance in this matter to enable her to see her way to the Love of Jesus©.

I cannot go as far as shaving my head in Sisterly Love for Broccoli but I'm sure Mr Kitler my guard Cat won't mind sacrificing his fur for The Lord®.
I found a picture on the Innernets of what I had in mind, but at the moment Mr Kitler is nowhere to be found since showing him this picture of a shaven Pussy.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

GLORY!! and AMEN!! Sisters.

I have to agree with the wise Sister Tali.

I am much too vain to shave off my lucious locks (and I'm sure JESUS would disapprove of my shaving somewhere else) so I shaved my Putty, Mr. Shittles. Then had to knit him a sweater to keep him warm.

I'm praying for Britney. She needs to get right with JESUS (like Anna Nicole did before she was called home to JESUS). Just imagine, right now JESUS is giving her a BIG hug welcoming her home all snug as a bug in a rug, tweenst her jugs.

With Lve and Compassion, Sister Thumper

[SUV]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

BLESS YOU, Godly Sisters!!!

I could also (almost) Bless the (apparently) Godly cats you've posted pictures of.

Praise (! - ?)
Perhaps Miss Petal must be the final Authority on the matter of: "Cats! Can they ever be Holy?"

[Talitha]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

Further research about Sister Broccoli reveals that she has a pet Canadian Beaver called Kevin.
Maybe if she doesn't have a Kitty she can shave that instead?

[parrotlover49]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

WILL this is the first christian post i have read on this forum. all we can do is pray for her
linda

[SUV]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

Sister, isn't this "Kevin" the Beast that Pastor is wont to threaten us with if we don't read our Bibles?

[Talitha]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

Sister, isn't this "Kevin" the Beast that Pastor is wont to threaten us with if we don't read our Bibles?

No Sister, I think that is Kevin the Gerbil.

Did that lady have the username Parrot lover69?
I think that's illegal in some States.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

Further research about Sister Broccoli reveals that she has a pet Canadian Beaver called Kevin.
Maybe if she doesn't have a Kitty she can shave that instead?

[ATTACH]1301[/ATTACH]

Aww, the "Beav" is even better looking than her soon-to-be-ex Fed Ex.

[virginWhore]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

Ladies: For the first step in Sisterly Love, to show solidarity with our beleagured future Angel, I ask: Which end should we shave first?

You know, its all the rage these days to go "al fresco" down there...I wonder why women don't sell their cuttings on ebay...the proceeds could go to tithing...and the wonderful thing is that you can do it again and again and again.


vw

[SUV]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

You know, its all the rage these days to go "al fresco" down there...I wonder why women don't sell their cuttings on ebay...the proceeds could go to tithing...and the wonderful thing is that you can do it again and again and again.

vw

I do admit, you have the talent to become a future Landover Baptist Christian! (You might need to give up that 'Joy Juice'....)

Why don't you go Right now to C-o-nFess-up some Sins to Pastor (you can do 'em as you go, if need be) and become $avED?

[SUV]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!



Ah, she has just entered Rehab for the third time. So can her Conversion to Born-again Christianity be far away?

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

Ah, she has just entered Rehab for the third time. So can her Conversion to Born-again Christianity be far away?

I hope so, but that shaved head has me thinking she may have become a boodist or a hairless krishna! Oh, Britney, first you refuse to submit to your husband, and now this? For shame! How many young girls who look up to her are going to be lead astray by her spitting in the face of Jesus? Why parents today allow someone like Britney to be a role model to their children instead of a Godly woman such as Betty Bowers, Ann Coulter, or Phyllis Schlafly is beyond me. If they insist on a female singer, then you can't possibly get a better role model than Anita Bryant!

[SUV]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

If only she were a Christ-o-holic like we are, Sister.

Now that is one 12-step program from which I'd never want to graduate!

[Enobarbus]

Re: PLEASE READ THIS FIRST!!!

If only she were a Christ-o-holic like we are, Sister.

Now that is one 12-step program from which I'd never want to graduate!

Indeed, Sister, indeed.

And perhaps we should all re-read 1Corinthians 11 for guidence in this matter:

1Cr 11:2 ¶ Now I praise you, brethren, that ye remember me in all things, and keep the ordinances, as I delivered [them] to you.

1Cr 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman [is] the man; and the head of Christ [is] God.

1Cr 11:4 Every man praying or prophesying, having [his] head covered, dishonoureth his head.

1Cr 11:5 But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with [her] head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.

1Cr 11:6 For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.

1Cr 11:7 For a man indeed ought not to cover [his] head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.

1Cr 11:8 For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man.

1Cr 11:9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.

1Cr 11:10 For this cause ought the woman to have power on [her] head because of the angels.

1Cr 11:11 Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.

1Cr 11:12 For as the woman [is] of the man, even so [is] the man also by the woman; but all things of God.

1Cr 11:13 Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?

1Cr 11:14 Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him?

1Cr 11:15 But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for [her] hair is given her for a covering.