If you could ask Jesus one question...

[Pastor Ezekiel]

If you could ask Jesus one question, what would it be?

Please post your (respectful) questions here.



Myself, I'd like to know why He decided to leave those pesky mosquitos on Noah's Ark. I mean, couldn't we have just let them drown?

[lilith]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

What,just the ONE question?

Hmm..in that case,think it'd have to be WHY didn't he prevent a load of misogynistic blokes from writing the Bible?

[moofy]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

I would ask what did they do with all that doodoo on the Ark.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

If you could ask Jesus one question, what would it be?

Please post your (respectful) questions here.



Myself, I'd like to know why He decided to leave those pesky mosquitos on Noah's Ark. I mean, couldn't we have just let them drown?

Well, the answer's perfectly simple. I'd ask him;
Do your ears hang low,
Do they wobble to and fro,
Can you tie them in a knot,
Can you tie them in a bow,
Can you throw them o'er your shoulder
Like a Continental Soldier,
Do your ears hang low?


Ok, seriously, I'd ask him, if he existed, what it's like to be a most likely illegitimate peasant man who had stories from older Pagan religions adapted, grafted onto his life, and made into one of the biggest cults on Earth. That's a pretty important question, really..

[SUV]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

First of all, everyone ignore that Rachael Hellsinker up there She better be Hoping that His Ears are in fact tiny; so tiny that they can not hear this Blasphemy.

Okay! I'd ask Jesus how he manages to keep His Robe looking so clean and brilliantly blue all the time. Do they have laundromats in Heaven? For sure they don't have the "ancient Chinese secret" up there because Certainly there are no Chinamen up in Heaven.

[WickedWitch]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

I'm posting for two people for this reply, isn't that fun?

Rex would ask Jesus if he would ever cut his hair.

I would ask him if, seeing as he's a snail, he would ever consider eating himself as escargot.

[SUV]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

I would ask him if, seeing as he's a snail, he would ever consider eating himself as escargot.

Blessings, Sister Alie! I figured if no one else got in on this pretty soon, I was Sure to be declared a Heretic

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

Why can't women come up with original thoughts?

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

Why can't women come up with original thoughts?

This from a man who uses a literal reading of an anthology of fragmented Bronze Age texts as his guide to modern life?

[Aethereal]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

I'd ask him what kind of coffee he likes.

[SUV]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

I'd ask him what kind of coffee he likes.

Oh, silly, silly, non-Christian!

Obviously it is a double latte mocha frappucino from Starbucks.

How do I know? The Bible told me so!

Or maybe it was somewhere else I heard it. Anyway - it is The Truth™

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

Oh, silly, silly, non-Christian!

Obviously it is a double latte mocha frappucino from Starbucks.

How do I know? The Bible told me so!

Or maybe it was somewhere else I heard it. Anyway - it is The Truth™

I thought you people hated Starbucks.

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=3178&highlight=starbucks

[WickedWitch]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

Blessings, Sister Alie! I figured if no one else got in on this pretty soon, I was Sure to be declared a Heretic

Well, Sister, as soon as you proposed the theory that Jesus was a Snail, I immediately knew it must be true - it just makes so much sense! Everything is all so clear to me now! And I just couldn't leave you alone on this one, could I?


Aethereal, I think he drinks [flashback to Zoolander]Orange Mocha Frappucinos![/flashback to Zoolander]

[Miss Hikari]

Re: If you could ask Jesus one question...

Hmm.... I would ask Jesus if he finds watching us stupid earthlings amusing.