Greetings People of Landover

[Student of Landover]

I would like to introduce myself.

I have been searching the internet for a godly site like yours, hoping and praying to the Lord that people like you existed. I have recently escaped from the foul false religion "wicca" and seen the light of Jesus. I am only 19, young in the ways of the world, and have come here to seek guidance on how to be a True Christian(R). I hope that you people will accept me, and that I can aid in some way in destroying those who oppose America and our glorious religion.

Thankyou for your time, and I hope to befriend many of you in the near future.

Andrew Owen

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

I would like to introduce myself.

I have been searching the internet for a godly site like yours, hoping and praying to the Lord that people like you existed. I have recently escaped from the foul false religion "wicca" and seen the light of Jesus. I am only 19, young in the ways of the world, and have come here to seek guidance on how to be a True Christian(R). I hope that you people will accept me, and that I can aid in some way in destroying those who oppose America and our glorious religion.

Thankyou for your time, and I hope to befriend many of you in the near future.

Andrew Owen

Welcome Andy. You have been called here for a reason. Open your heart and your bank account to Jesus, and Salvation will come your way. The Paypal button has been placed at the bottom of this screen just for you. Hit it now and we'll set you up with an appropriate Tithing schedule. For the Holy Bible tells us:

Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings. (Mal. 3:8)

Praise Jesus, I'm sure you don't want to rob Him, now do you?

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

I will tithe the $50 of the gold account as soon as is possible, that money is not in my paypal account at present. What else may I do that is glorious and right and benificial to Landover? In what ways may I do more to become a TrueChristian?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

I will tithe the $50 of the gold account as soon as is possible, that money is not in my paypal account at present. What else may I do that is glorious and right and benificial to Landover? In what ways may I do more to become a TrueChristian?

Son, $50 won't even get Pastor Pistle's Lear jet gas tanks damp. You'll have to do better than that, as Jesus explained:

Mark 12:41 And Jesus sat over against the treasury, and beheld how the people cast money into the treasury: and many that were rich cast in much. Mark 12:42 And there came a certain poor widow, and she threw in two mites, which make a farthing. Mark 12:43 And he called unto him his disciples, and saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That this poor widow hath cast more in, than all they which have cast into the treasury: Mark 12:44 For all they did cast in of their abundance; but she of her want did cast in all that she had, even all her living.

Jesus wants you to Tithe EVERYTHING son. Get on it.

As for becoming a True Christian....well son, many desire such an honor, yet few achieve it. Read the Holy KJV1611 Bible from cover to cover, and read through all of the threads in this Godly forum. If Jesus taps you on the shoulder, you'll know something is about to happen.

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Yes Sir, thankyou sir for your advice. I will do what you say, and donate everything I can to this almighty, wonderful church. I just want to do whatever I can.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Yes Sir, thankyou sir for your advice. I will do what you say, and donate everything I can to this almighty, wonderful church. I just want to do whatever I can.

Well, you're an agreeable sort of unsaved scum ex-wiccer.... I hope you continue on with success. I'm waiting for the DOF report on you, and our high-priced jew accountants are waiting for your promised Tithe.

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Unfortunately, my parents are evilutionists who would not allow christianity into our house, but were more than happy for me to study wicker, goth, and all those other, disgusting forms of satanism. Then I saw the light when I stumbled upon the KJV1611 Bible. I am still trying to convert some of those who were in the coven where I... practised that disgusting, evil, devil worshipping false religion.

One day I would like to be as succesful as you people, and become a pastor, or at least somebody who spreads the word of God. I hope that I will prove myself worthy of Jesus and Landover.

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Excuse me for posting twice in a row, but I was wondering why I cannot see the profiles of others. Must I prove myself further before I can read the profiles? What exactly does it mean when it says "Under Investigation" next to my name? Thankyou.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Excuse me for posting twice in a row, but I was wondering why I cannot see the profiles of others. Must I prove myself further before I can read the profiles? What exactly does it mean when it says "Under Investigation" next to my name? Thankyou.

Until we get your dossier from the DOF, you are catagorized as "under investigation", and as such have limited priviledges in this forum. I am sorry to say it, but we have had cases in the past where demonic, zit-faced, sodomite gothtards have slithered in here posing as Christians....but of course they were found out and disposed of quickly. Praise Jesus!

Be patient and read all you can, as Jesus desires.

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Please do not mistake this for impatience, but how long will the Department of Faith take? Obviously this wise organisation knows everything about me, but there isn't much that should worry them.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Please do not mistake this for impatience, but how long will the Department of Faith take? Obviously this wise organisation knows everything about me, but there isn't much that should worry them.

It depends on your background, and how busy they are. Is there anything you'd like to tell us before i read your report?

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

I have already told you that I, unfortunately, was a wicker. Before that, I was not christian, but was not anti christian. My evil teacher was a commy and tried to make me one too, but even then I knew that what she was preaching was evil. I have always supported George Bush and the war on Iraq. My parents are new age freaks, but I am not. I am going to enter the army next year, and fight in Iraq alongside the American soldiers.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

I have already told you that I, unfortunately, was a wicker. Before that, I was not christian, but was not anti christian. My evil teacher was a commy and tried to make me one too, but even then I knew that what she was preaching was evil. I have always supported George Bush and the war on Iraq. My parents are new age freaks, but I am not. I am going to enter the army next year, and fight in Iraq alongside the American soldiers.

Well Praise Jesus! You sound like you've got your head screwed on right. What country are you from, boy?

[Student of Landover]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Australia, Sir. I want to go to America though, and hopefully move to Freehold if I would be allowed in. First though, I wanna go blow the heads off of some muslum pigdogs!

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Greetings People of Landover

Andrew.....wasn't there another Andrew here before?

So you've become brainwashed.....ummm....good for you?