[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Well, after spending a day at Mikeys bedside things are not looking too good.
His heart rate has dropped to a level where we may not be able to get a suitable sample.

The Celebratory Conception may not take place after all.
It's a blow to Mikeys memory, but obviously Jesus© has made alternative arrangements.

Oh well...Jesus always wins.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Oh well...Jesus always wins.

In this case I'd say the whole human race wins. *snicker*

[lilith]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

In this case I'd say the whole human race wins. *snicker*

Hur hur hur!

Especially Sister Talitha,who'd have otherwise been stuck bringing up Brother Mikey's sprogs....which,given the level of Brother Mikey's maturity was always going to be a long,long job.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Hur hur hur!

Especially Sister Talitha,who'd have otherwise been stuck bringing up Brother Mikey's sprogs....which,given the level of Brother Mikey's maturity was always going to be a long,long job.

You people seem to misunderstand the entire Christian ethic. We believe that every life is sacred of course, but we also understand that once a child establishes a lineage and the property is settled up there is no reason it can't go to Kartoum for adoption. The church gets a lot of business from the Madonnas of the world.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

You people seem to misunderstand the entire Christian ethic. We believe that every life is sacred of course, but we also understand that once a child establishes a lineage and the property is settled up there is no reason it can't go to Kartoum for adoption. The church gets a lot of business from the Madonnas of the world.

Surely Mike had a will? Something along the lines of something scrawled on a napkin saying 'I leev mye propertee to LBC baptist cherch' (as he would have spelled it) or something like that?
Wouldn't that have spared all this.....this.....

Hur hur hur!old

Especially Sister Talitha,who'd have otherwise been stuck bringing up Brother Mikey's sprogs....which,given the level of Brother Mikey's maturity was always going to be a long,long job.

Not to mention the arduous task of managing to locate the organ in question.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Surely Mike had a will? Something along the lines of something scrawled on a napkin saying 'I leev mye propertee to LBC baptist cherch' (as he would have spelled it) or something like that?
Wouldn't that have spared all this.....this.....

Oh, yes! The WILL! Darn, now why didn't I remember that dear Bro. Mike had left his will in my safe just before he went off to shoot Catlicks in the woods?

As a big "THANK YOU" for reminding me, I am going to ask Sister Tali to send you the turkey thingie for your next pregnancy.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Oh, yes! The WILL! Darn, now why didn't I remember that dear Bro. Mike had left his will in my safe just before he went off to shoot Catlicks in the woods?

There you go!
And he did write it on a napkin, didn't he?

As a big "THANK YOU" for reminding me, I am going to ask Sister Tali to send you the turkey thingie for your next pregnancy.

No problem. Thanks but...ummm....you keep it. My husband and I prefer doing things the old fashioned way and...ummmm....then there's the thought of where that bastard has been

[Enobarbus]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

There you go!
And he did write it on a napkin, didn't he?


No problem. Thanks but...ummm....you keep it. My husband and I prefer doing things the old fashioned way and...ummmm....then there's the thought of where that bastard has been

Don't be ridiculous. Pastor Pistle very kindly put himself out to personally draft it for him and read it to him (what makes you think that Bro Mikey could read and write). Bro Mike appended his x mark and it was put into Pastor Pistle's personal safe. More evidence of just how much Pastor Pistle involves himself -- despite his high rank in the church -- with the affairs of even the most lowly of his beloved flock.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Don't be ridiculous. Pastor Pistle very kindly put himself out to personally draft it for him and read it to him (what makes you think that Bro Mikey could read and write).

Well, seeing as he posted on this forum I assumed he could, in fact, read at least with a basic understanding and use some form of basic spellchecker (and still didn't get them all). Unless he dictated it to a servant, if he was as rich as you're saying.

Bro Mike appended his x mark and it was put into Pastor Pistle's personal safe. More evidence of just how much Pastor Pistle involves himself -- despite his high rank in the church -- with the affairs of even the most lowly of his beloved flock.

Well, if the 'lowliest' have estates the value of which could get him some brand new luxury cars and another (I assume) mansion, then why wouldn't he concern himself?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

Well, seeing as he posted on this forum I assumed he could, in fact, read at least with a basic understanding and use some form of basic spellchecker (and still didn't get them all). Unless he dictated it to a servant, if he was as rich as you're saying.


Well, if the 'lowliest' have estates the value of which could get him some brand new luxury cars and another (I assume) mansion, then why wouldn't he concern himself?

MANSION!?!? Dear girl.... Dear HELLBOUND HEATHEN girl... I am merely a pastor in the house of the LORD. We are not rich, we are not wealthy. Although after I realized how much that pastor in Looserana was making with his ATM idea, I do believe that I feel a divine revelation coming on.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

MANSION!?!? Dear girl.... Dear HELLBOUND HEATHEN girl... I am merely a pastor in the house of the LORD. We are not rich, we are not wealthy. Although after I realized how much that pastor in Looserana was making with his ATM idea, I do believe that I feel a divine revelation coming on.

Aren't you? But BJ is always talking about his house, his servants, etc etc. I assumed your Pastors would probably be rich.
But you know, you might be better off putting in a vending machine....how many in your congregation would be able to resist some artery clogging snacks?
Or, an in-church steak house. You'd probably make a lot of money.
Hang on.....why am I telling you this?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

There you go!
And he did write it on a napkin, didn't he?


No problem. Thanks but...ummm....you keep it. My husband and I prefer doing things the old fashioned way and...ummmm....then there's the thought of where that bastard has been

You REALLY ought to have more respect for your husband, but I'm sure he feels the same way about you.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

You REALLY ought to have more respect for your husband!

I said BASTER!!! The same word you used! If you interpret THAT as a typo from me, then what would that mean for every time the word 'baster' was used in this thread??

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

I said BASTER!!! The same word you used! If you interpret THAT as a typo from me, then what would that mean for every time the word 'baster' was used in this thread??

As much time as you try to weasel out of things I can't tell if you are Rachael vanHellbound or Greta VanSustern.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Brother Mike’s status.

As much time as you try to weasel out of things I can't tell if you are Rachael vanHellbound or Greta VanSustern.

Who?