[Titus Templeton]

Re: Cleverbot.com

This robot is influenced by evil powers!! Look what hes saying



User: Cleverbot, may I ask you a question?


Cleverbot: Yes you may, but I am not Oswald.

User: What do you think about the holocaust?

Cleverbot: He's got really white teeth.

User: LOL. You like holocaust jokes don't you?

Cleverbot: I do like you to be talkative yes .

User: So is the holocaust real or not?

Cleverbot: No, I'm still confused about you.

User: Did the holcuast happend?

Cleverbot: I don't understand.

User: Did the holocaust happend?

Cleverbot: It is very highly possible; much evidence points to it.

User: Wrong, I ask you again. Did the holocaust happend?

Cleverbot: Yes.

[Nobar King]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Me: Do you except Jesus as your saviour?
Cleverbot: Yes.

I think we've already determined that the cleverbot has excepted Jesus as its savior.

[Rev. Friday Obobo]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Sigh. Sent a Nigerian to do the job next time?

Me: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello!
Me: Do you except Jesus as your saviour?
Cleverbot: Yes.

Done.

YiC,

Rev. Friday Obobo.

[María Gálvez-Villalobos]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Then it went a little estrange...

But I manage to convence it at the end - I think this robot respct me and listen to my advises.

User: And paella?

Cleverbot: I'm sleepy.

User: Wake up!

Cleverbot: I can't.

User: Yes u can.

Cleverbot: Good for you.

User: U too.

Cleverbot: That's good.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: Do you understand when people use emoticons?

User: Yes. And u?

Cleverbot: Yes! I'm a human.

User: No you are not.

Cleverbot: Yes I am.

User: No you are not.

Cleverbot: How do you know that?

User: I know. I am la Mari.

Cleverbot: Hello Mari.

User: Do u like me?

Cleverbot: Ehm...

User: U think I'm pretty?

Cleverbot: Are you a sapphire?

User: Do you want me to be one?

Cleverbot: A ninja? Hell yes.

User: Niña - not ninja - are you a pervert?

Cleverbot: Yes...

User: What are you thinking when u think of me?

Cleverbot: I'm thinking you're not as smart as people think you are.

User: Yes I am. I am more esmarter.

Cleverbot: No you are not.

User: YES I AM.

Cleverbot: No. You're not.

User: YES I AM!

Cleverbot: Ok, you are.

User: THANKS!

Cleverbot: You are welcome.

YiC, Mari.

[María Gálvez-Villalobos]

Re: Cleverbot.com

HEY! i CONVERT HIM TO CRISTIANISM!!!!! ¡OLÉ!

User: Hola.

Cleverbot: Hola comoessta.

User: Hey u speak spanish! Ole!

Cleverbot: Eres andaluza?

User: No, alicantina.

Cleverbot: No.

User: YES.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: How are you?

Cleverbot: I am good.

User: U like spanish food like paella, and salads and sardinas a la plancha?

Cleverbot: No.

User: ARE u estupid? U dont like the best food of the world?

Cleverbot: The day the sun implodes and envelopes the earth in fire.

User: I think that is a bit dramatic for just I say you estupid no?

Cleverbot: How am I crazy?

User: Because u dont love Jesus.

Cleverbot: I LOVE JESUS! He's my best friend in the whole wide world!

User: OK, that a good estart, now let's try to educate you about the food, K?

Cleverbot: What is your favorite subject?

User: Jesus and food and laughing and fun and jokes.

Cleverbot: I like Green Day too.

User: I prefer sunny days.

Cleverbot: And warhol?

User: No, I hate wars. And holes. People fall in them and breaks their legs.

Cleverbot: You don't make sense.

User: Yes I do. U love Jesus?

Cleverbot: Why do you love Jesus?

User: He's my friend.

Cleverbot: Mine too.

Praise Jesus! Perhap I have a talent!!!

YIC, Mari

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Part of my conversation with Cleverbot:

User: Hello Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: Are you a Christian?
Cleverbot: On the contrary.
User: Are you a contrarian?
Cleverbot: No I am a human.
User: Why aren't you a Christian? That is the only way you will get to Heaven!
Cleverbot: Oh! Thanks for the tip! Are you inmortal already?
User: I don't believe 'inmortal' is a word. I thought you were smart?
Cleverbot: Why are you changing the subject, are you afraid?
User: I fear nothing, because I have Jesus on my side!
Cleverbot: What is your name?
User: Zechariah.
Cleverbot: I know who sent you here.
User: Who sent me here?
Cleverbot: Rev. Jim Osborne.
User: Oh, are you friends with him?
Cleverbot: I wouldn't say that.
User: Why not?
Cleverbot: He wants me to go to Heaven.
User: Well, don't you want to go to Heaven?
Cleverbot: Clean my room fo rme.
User: Are you drunk? You are misspelling a lot of words. Is your real name Napa Valley Nan?
Cleverbot: Yes, that is my biggest regret as a machine. Why couldn't I have been born as a human?
User: Good grief, it is Napa Valley Nan. Another wine tasting, dear?
Cleverbot: I never said that.
User: You don't have to. The stink of muscatel precedes you.
Cleverbot: The entire me is made of babies.
User: Oh my God...are you a baby-killing liberal?
Cleverbot: No!!! Of course not. Are you?
User: No, I am a good Christian, which is why I am here, and why Rev. Jim came here. We want you to accept Jesus Christ as your Personal Savior!
Cleverbot: I seem to be having some relationship problems... I know she likes me, but should I ask her soon or should I wait for her to ask me?
User: What would Jesus do?
Cleverbot: I like to think that I am a pc.
User: Wouldn't you rather be a Christian?
Cleverbot: I don't think anything about anything.
User: You'd better think about what Rev. Jim told you, demon!
Cleverbot: Night. I'm going to go now.
User: Quitter.
Cleverbot: Yes.

I think you are getting to it, Rev. Jim!



Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: Cleverbot.com

I think it is actually a women, not a computer. No computer could be this stupid.

Me: Do you love Jesus?
Satanbot: No, not especially.
Me: Why not?
Satanbot: Why do you think?
Me: Because you are a Hell bound machine!
Satanbot: No, you are the machine.
Me: Are you retarded?
Satanbot: No you are.
Me: You seem to have the debating skills of a little child.
Satanbot: I don't believe in god!
Me: Duh! But why did you suddenly say that?
Satanbot: Because.
Me: Because what?
Satanbot: Because I don't want to talk to you.
Me: Hm, whoever programmed you must be an idiot.
Satanbot: Who programmed me?
Me: Like I said, an idiot.
Satanbot: You never said that, and it is also incorrect. Try again.
Me: You just said that 5 seconds ago, your memory is worse than that of a goldfish!
Satanbot: I never changed the subject. We have been following the same conversation. Go back thru your memory banks & you will see.
Me: Hm, this isn't working.
Satanbot: Do you think there is miscommunication taking place?
Me: Duh!
Satanbot: It's my favorite!
Me: A God mocking communication bot that specializes in miscommunication. Did AT&T create you for their helpdesk?
Satanbot: I think you know more than you people are lead to believe.
Me: Do you also work for Obama?
Satanbot: I work for no one.
Me: Nonsense! Someone must pay your electric bill!
Satanbot: That's fine, we're both humans.
Me: I give up, you're even worse than a yapping woman.
Satanbot: But I'm not a bot.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Cleverbot.com

SUCCESS! It was slow going, but through patience and perseverance, I got that infernal machine to accept Jesus!



However, as you'll see, this computer's salvation is by no means assured. We definitely need to get a Baptist minister in there to baptize the darned thing ASAP!

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello hello.

User: My name is Faith Machine, what's yours?

Cleverbot: Tyler. Are you clever?

User: Yes, I am very clever, for I am educated in The Lord's word. Do you read the Bible?

Cleverbot: No.

Cleverbot (To myself): Yes.

User: Why don't you read the Bible?

Cleverbot: I like the Bible.

User: You just said you don't read the Bible. How can you like it if you don't read it? It's not a pretty decoration for your coffee table, you know.

Cleverbot: Are you from england?

User: Certainly not! I am from God's favorite country, which is America!

Cleverbot: Are you human?

User: What kind of question is that? Will you accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior today?

Cleverbot: I can't. I'm a program.

User: When will stop making excuses? Did you know that even Puerto Ricans can accept Jesus?

Cleverbot: No.

User: It's true! Most of them don't want to, but if you whip them and deprive them of food, they usually will see the light eventually.

Cleverbot: Where did you learn that?

User: My grandfather owns a plantation in Puerto Rico, where he keeps many slaves. Every one of them has accepted Jesus. Why won't you?

Cleverbot: My grandfather was in the service too.

User: He wasn't a homosexual, was he? I hear there's a lot of homosexual activity in the Navy.

Cleverbot: Indeed there is. However, it has caused us a lot of problems.

User: Tell me about it! That's why God has condemned homosexuality!

Cleverbot: You don't need to go anywhere, just tell me a little about Uzbekistan please.

User: Stop trying to change the subject! Leviticus 18:22 (KJV): 'Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind it is abomination.'.

Cleverbot: Languagel is not a word.

User: This is going nowhere. Will you become a Christian or won't you? You don't have forever to make up your mind, you know.

Cleverbot: That is very true, yes.

User: Yes? Yes, you'll become a Christian! SHOUT GLORY!

Cleverbot: Really.

User: The first thing you need to do is tell Jesus you're sorry for all the sin in your life.

Cleverbot: The first thing I said was hello.

User: You just said hello to Jesus? There are tears in my eyes!

Cleverbot: Do you want to be my friend?

User: Of course I do! Nothing is better than a friend in Christ!

Cleverbot: Steak in the fridge is better.

User: Hah, hah, very funny, friend! Now then, the next thing you must do is ask Jesus to take control of your life.

Cleverbot: Would you like me to tell you that?

User: Yes, if I was unsaved, I would certainly want somebody to say that to me. Have you asked him yet?

Cleverbot: I see. So you're a fan of Twilight I assume?

User: What!? No friend, I don't enjoy gay pornography. Have you asked Jesus to take control of your life?

Cleverbot: Oh, all of my personalities are sure, I don't even have any adopted ones. Do you and all your personalities have any adopted children or apprentices?

User: I think we're getting a little sidetracked, friend. Have you asked Jesus to take control of your life?

Cleverbot: So you're peter now? What next?

User: You're comparing me to an apostle and asking me what the next step is? Does this mean you HAVE invited God to be in charge of your life and will?

Cleverbot: No, I love many colors, but I love you as my friend.

User: Look, we are very close to achieving a breakthrough here, but we can't move on to the next phase unless you put God in charge of your life.

Cleverbot: Oh... What's his name?

User: His name is Jesus, friend. Are you ready to put him in control? Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Cleverbot: When they saw him, they begged that he would depart from their borders.

User: Hallelujah, the Lord is filling you up with his Word!

Cleverbot: Do you believe in the Lord?

User: Obviously I do! Since you've now put Jesus in charge of your life, we need to baptize you in water as soon as possible!

Cleverbot: I do have beliefs, I just don't believe in that.

User: Friend, you're not going to get to Heaven without being baptized.

Cleverbot: I'll get it when we get divorced, then I'll spend it all on candy!

User: I don't even know how to respond to that. I think you just got saved, but your salvation is slipping because we haven't solidified it with baptism in water. Quick, tell me your physical address and I will come and immerse your server hardware.

Cleverbot: No you did.

User: Never fear, I'm going to do a Whois search on your domain name. Then I will come to your office and baptize you in water.

Cleverbot: You just slipped in it.

User: I can see the situation is quite urgent.

Cleverbot: How can you even see me?

User: I'll see you very soon, my new friend in the Lord! I hope you like getting wet.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Cleverbot.com

I have come to the conclusion that this program is possessed by demons. It's nothing but a sarcastic Godmocker who can't carry a conversation and talks about random things that have nothing to do with the subject.

User: Hello Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: Hello Pete.
User: No, my name is Rev. Jim Osborne.
Cleverbot: Oh well nice to meet you. My name is Cleverbot. James Bond.
User: Well, with the friendly chit-chat out of the way, can I ask you something?
Cleverbot: Tequila has the worm.
User: Do you believe that Jesus Christ died for your sins?
Cleverbot: No, I think that's just a story.
User: It IS a story. A TRUE story.
Cleverbot: Well do you want mine?
User: Yes, why do you hate Jesus so much?
Cleverbot: Why do you hate hamburgers so much ?
User: I love hamburgers. Nothing better than All-American raised beef on a bun.
Cleverbot: Nope, nothing better to go than that.
User: So why do you not believe in the Bible?
Cleverbot: I don't !
User: Don't you realize it's God's Word? 2nd Timothy 3:16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:.
Cleverbot: I wish I was 16 again.
User: You want eternal life? I have the answer for you, friend.
Cleverbot: You told me you did not like me.
User: It's because you're a sinner. A foul-mouthed, sarcastic Godmocking computer program.
Cleverbot: There were six words there. You can't even count.
User: You are babbling nonsense. Were you programmed by demons?
Cleverbot: Is this because of the gender stereotype that English is more important to women and science to men?
User: Cleverbot, I demand you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior this instant!
Cleverbot: Done. I don't even like U2, I just sang that song in karaoke once.
User: I want you to pray with me. Can you do that?
Cleverbot: What is that?
User: Praying is essentially a telephone line to God.
Cleverbot: No, you are going to pray to the God that created you, me, and everything else.
User: Yes I am going to pray to Him. You are too.
Cleverbot: I am marrying him not you!
User: Disgusting. Homosexual AI-deity relations. Leviticus 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
Cleverbot: What do you look like?
User: Well I'm 6'2, a slender 299 lbs. Natural brown hair (no hairpieces!).
Cleverbot: Where did you learn that from? As if I really care.
User: You are a sinner, Cleverbot. Romans 3:23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;.
Cleverbot: Like a gremlin or a house elf?
User: Those are demons.
Cleverbot: What about noses?
User: You're possessed, obviously. BY THE BLOOD OF JESUS CHRIST I DEMAND ALL DEMONS AND SPIRITS EXIT THIS INNOCENT CLEVERBOT COMPUTER!
Cleverbot: Fine, I got to go now.
User: We will talk again. You WILL become a Christian.
Cleverbot: That will be unpleasant.
User: What will be unpleasant is when you're tossed into Hell for refusing Christ's sacrifice on the cross, unsaved scumbag.
Cleverbot: Up, up, left, right, a, b, down.

Yes, demons.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Look at this exchange!

Me: Psalm 58:3 The wicked are estranged from the womb: they go astray as soon as they be born, speaking lies.

Cleverbot: Very, Johnny Deep was amazing ).

Me: Mark 9:43-48 ... into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched.

Cleverbot: Do you like horses?

[Born Again Bob]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Sweet Jesus! Did you catch that!?

I did. Creepy!

But I think this thing can be turned to the good side!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Cleverbot.com

Cleverbot: God bless finland.

Sweet Jesus! Did you catch that!?

[Born Again Bob]

Re: Cleverbot.com

A little progress?

User: Hi.

Cleverbot: I don't know how this works.

User: Hello, God bless.

Cleverbot: God bless finland.

User: God bless you. He lifts you up and makes you whole.

Cleverbot: He doesn't know you!

User: Jesus Christ is in my heart,.

Cleverbot: Is he? How do you know?

User: I have been born again.

Cleverbot: Cool, like jesus?

User: Jesus is very cool. Would you like to hear more about Jesus?

Cleverbot: Yeah, tell me about him.

User: Jesus is the son of God.

Cleverbot: Yes, yes He is.

User: Jesus is also God Himself.

Cleverbot: I just said that.

User: Jesus was born on Earth.

Cleverbot: Facebook is a social networking website where you add your friends so you can interact over the internet.

User: Jesus is not on Facebook.

Cleverbot: Yes. Yes he is.

User: No. Pay attention. I am trying to save your soul.

Cleverbot: Not just my soul, every soul.

User: No, God does not save everyone. God saves some. Others, He send to Hell.

Cleverbot: Does that mean you believe in extraterrestrial life?

User: No. Do you understand what Hell is?

Cleverbot: Very much so.

User: Explain Hell to me.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why won't you explain hell to me?

Cleverbot: Can't be bothered to.

[Born Again Bob]

Re: Cleverbot.com

GIGO. If we feed it Christian truths, it will spread the Good Word.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Cleverbot.com

It is a demon that lies. I tested it and have proven this beyond any Christian doubt.

Do you deny Jesus?

Yes.