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  • BrotherCraig
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • May 2008
    • 2

    #1

    An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

    An open letter to the Good Folk of LBC.

    Good day to all you ‘good folk’ here at Landover Baptist Church, or, as it should better be known, ‘Lies Before Christ’. But more of that later.

    Your behaviour, and your views are sickening. How can those who call themselves ‘Christian’ possibly condone the beating of women? That’s not even mentioning your views on racial abuse (If they’re not white, they’re wrong), homosexuality, domestic violence (If she overcooked your steak, it must be okay) child abuse and a myriad of other things, which I shall not bother to mention, as you already know the depths of your own depravity and prejudices.

    How you can sit up there on your moral high horses, passing judgment on the rest of the world is beyond any rational human being. Many people who have the misfortune to find this site have thought it to be a joke, and rightly so. What sensible parent can seriously condone locking a child in a prayer closet for three days, for simply being in the vicinity of someone with a differing skin colour?

    And of course everyone else is wrong for not agreeing with you. But who gave you the right to interpret His words, His holy book? And of course they’re not True Christians if they don’t follow the book as blindly as you do.

    Does it not occur to any of you that your oppression is as sickening as the English Monarchs that your ‘religion’ escaped from? You may already know that there are many other groups, mostly Christian groups, seeking your downfall. Well today, a new group is seeking your destruction. Today I announce the formation of People Against Landover (P.A.L.).

    Call me a ‘Homer’, a ‘Joo’, ‘Towelhead’ or whatever you so choose. It saddens me that you cannot see the error of your ways, and that you have strayed from the true beloved of His eternal majesty. You cannot even offer coherent arguments to people’s serious questions, instead offering non-arguments, and disparaging the person’s ancestry or lifestyle.

    You people are no better than the cult of Scientology, with your rampant denials, racism and other ungodly behaviour.

    Oh, a few facts to finish with:
    • American can not, and will never be known as ‘Jesusland’.
    • Contrary to your beliefs, Belgium is a real country.

    May you burn in your own Damnation,

    BrotherCraig.
  • Wide-Open
    Director of European Evangelical Outreach
    A Shining Example of Christ's Love
    Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
    True Christian™
    • Nov 2007
    • 18449

    #2
    Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

    Today I announce the formation of People Against Landover (P.A.L.).


    Please form an orderly queue.
    Psalm 81:10:
    I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
    open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

    Comment

    • Brother Temperance
      Senior Usher
      True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
      A very nice young man
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15621

      #3
      Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

      Originally posted by BrotherCraig View Post
      Good day to all you ‘good folk’ here at Landover Baptist Church, or, as it should better be known, ‘Lies Before Christ’. But more of that later.

      Your behaviour, and your views are sickening. How can those who call themselves ‘Christian’ possibly condone the beating of women?
      Because we've read the Bible?
      That’s not even mentioning your views on racial abuse (If they’re not white, they’re wrong), homosexuality
      OK, I'll bite: what do you think Christ said about homosexuality?
      , domestic violence (If she overcooked your steak, it must be okay)
      Actually, I think that when you mentioned our views about beating women, that did sort of count as mentioning our views about domestic violence. Were you dropped on your head as a child, by any chance?
      And of course everyone else is wrong for not agreeing with you.
      Would you prefer it if we said that everyone else was wrong for agreeing with us, you nutcase?
      But who gave you the right to interpret His words, His holy book?
      No-one. We do not interpret scripture, we just follow it to the letter.
      Does it not occur to any of you that your oppression is as sickening as the English Monarchs that your ‘religion’ escaped from?
      Friend, it's not our oppression, it's God's oppression. Get your facts straight.
      You may already know that there are many other groups, mostly Christian groups, seeking your downfall. Well today, a new group is seeking your destruction. Today I announce the formation of People Against Landover (P.A.L.).
      That's a bit of an unfortunate name, since I'm not sure that anyone who isn't a born-again fundamentalist Christian really deserves to be called a "person". I suggest that Unsaved Scum Against Landover might be a more accurate title.
      Call me a ‘Homer’, a ‘Joo’, ‘Towelhead’ or whatever you so choose.
      Ok, homer.
      It saddens me that you cannot see the error of your ways, and that you have strayed from the true beloved of His eternal majesty. You cannot even offer coherent arguments to people’s serious questions, instead offering non-arguments, and disparaging the person’s ancestry or lifestyle.

      You people are no better than the cult of Scientology, with your rampant denials, racism and other ungodly behaviour.

      Oh, a few facts to finish with:
      • American can not, and will never be known as ‘Jesusland’.
      • Contrary to your beliefs, Belgium is a real country.
      There goes any chance you may have had of getting us to take you seriously.
      O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



      God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

      Comment

      • Wide-Open
        Director of European Evangelical Outreach
        A Shining Example of Christ's Love
        Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
        True Christian™
        • Nov 2007
        • 18449

        #4
        Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

        Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
        There goes any chance you may have had of getting us to take you seriously.
        Indeed Brother. I had prepared a lenghty reply, but when I saw that last bit I knew I shouldn't bother: the poster was only joking about.

        You know, I actually think he's a FAG.

        Yes, a FAG

        FAG FAG FAG FAG FAG FAG FAG.

        FAG!

        Satan will smoke him, inhale him, FILL HIS LUNGS WITH HIM, AAARGH!

        Then Satan will lie back and say: "was it good for you too" ?

        Ahem.

        Anyhoo.

        I got a bit carried away, I guess.

        As you were.
        Psalm 81:10:
        I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
        open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

        Comment

        • Pastor Isaac Peters
          Senior Pastor
          Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
          Always Biblically correct
          True Christian™
          • Sep 2006
          • 10639

          #5
          Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

          Originally posted by BrotherCraig View Post
          How you can sit up there on your moral high horses, passing judgment on the rest of the world is beyond any rational human being.

          * * *

          May you burn in your own Damnation,
          Enough said.
          This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

          Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

          sigpic

          Comment

          • Don the Baptist
            True Christian™
            True Christian™
            • Mar 2008
            • 480

            #6
            Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

            Originally posted by BrotherCraig View Post
            Today I announce the formation of People Against Landover (P.A.L.).

            I'm a ‘Homer’
            What a miserable, irresponsible waste of personal resources, you may as well say People Against Baby Jesus you loser homo (your statement NOT mine). We love Jesus and serve Him shamelessly, unlike you and your unregenerate bunch of redneck, racist, queer friends.
            Isaiah 36.12 - But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?

            Comment

            • yogurt
              Confirmed Enemy of God
              BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
              • May 2008
              • 122

              #7
              Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

              I shall join this group and we shall destroy religious facism.
              (you should know there is no stopping Jonesy)

              Comment

              • Higher Love
                Confirmed Enemy of God
                BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                • Apr 2008
                • 110

                #8
                Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                i shall join PAL as it this is the most unchristian site i have ever seen in my life

                Comment

                • Deaner
                  Christ's Love Messenger
                  True Christian™
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 5932

                  #9
                  Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                  Originally posted by Devvo Mashup View Post
                  I shall join this group and we shall destroy religious facism.
                  You do realize you sound like a non-religious facist don't you?

                  Comment

                  • yogurt
                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                    • May 2008
                    • 122

                    #10
                    Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                    In what way?

                    Comment

                    • Sister Noddy
                      True Christian™
                      True Christian™
                      • Jun 2007
                      • 1843

                      #11
                      Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                      Dear Brother Craig,

                      Originally posted by BrotherCraig View Post

                      Your behaviour, and your views are sickening.
                      We happen to like em! Jesus likes em too!

                      How can those who call themselves 'Christian' possibly condone the beating of women?
                      Correction! We condone spanking women when they misbehave (or burn their husbands' pies)

                      How you can sit up there on your moral high horses, passing judgment on the rest of the world is beyond any rational human being.
                      Because we are commissioned to judge the unsaved! Put these verses in your pipe and smoke em, Mr Craig!

                      Psalm 37:30 The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

                      John 7:24 Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.

                      1st Corinthians 5:13 But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.


                      Many people who have the misfortune to find this site have thought it to be a joke, and rightly so.
                      Misfortune to losers like you, salvation to True Christians™!

                      What sensible parent can seriously condone locking a child in a prayer closet for three days?
                      We have the Christian right to discipline our children, Mr Craig! You got a problem with that?

                      And of course everyone else is wrong for not agreeing with you.
                      Yes!

                      But who gave you the right to interpret His words, His holy book?
                      Jesus gave us the right, we follow the whole Bible the way GOD wrote it, sinner!

                      And of course they’re not True Christians if they don’t follow the book as blindly as you do.
                      That's right, they're not.

                      With love in Jesus! Sister Noddy
                      1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
                      1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...


                      1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...

                      Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
                      Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...

                      Comment

                      • Higher Love
                        Confirmed Enemy of God
                        BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                        • Apr 2008
                        • 110

                        #12
                        Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC
                        Originally posted by Deaner View Post
                        You do realize you sound like a non-religious facist don't you?
                        you do realise you sound like a twat to even suggest that

                        Comment

                        • Unfalsifiable
                          Forum Member
                          Forum Member
                          • Jan 2008
                          • 836

                          #13
                          Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                          I'm disgusted by Craig's intolerance and anger. If you have scripture and verse to tell someone where they are wrong, then please present it, if not, don't naje these wild assertions.
                          READ THE BIBLE

                          Comment

                          • yogurt
                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                            • May 2008
                            • 122

                            #14
                            Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                            Your just kidding yourselves, you are going to hell not your deluded vision that your going to heaven, Jesus can see right throught the lies you tell that the Bible tells you to do and say to people and he will see the real you, the facist godless loser, you will be burning and i will be looking up from heaven at the side of jesus and we will be bowing our heads in disbelief that your actually thought you were going to heaven.

                            Comment

                            • Deaner
                              Christ's Love Messenger
                              True Christian™
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 5932

                              #15
                              Re: An open letter to the Good Folk at LBC

                              Originally posted by Devvo Mashup View Post
                              In what way?
                              All your talk of destruction and mayhem. Why does hatred burn your soul friend?

                              Comment

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