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  • Daisy Mae Johnson
    The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
    Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
    aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 15708

    #1

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY, John Cresser!

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

    Your birthday is only days away from JESUS' birthday! How blessed are you?!


    [/CENTER]
    sigpic

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  • Didymus Much
    Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
    • Jun 2010
    • 14079

    #2
    Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, John Cresser!

    Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post
    AUUUGGGGHH, my eyes!!! It BURNS!!!!


    Happy Birthday, anyways.

    Comment

    • John North
      True Christian™
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2012
      • 414

      #3
      Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, John Cresser!

      Happy Birthday!
      Stop whining
      (1 Thessalonians 5:18) - In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
      (1 Corinthians 10:10) - Neither murmur ye, as some of them also murmured, and were destroyed of the destroyer
      (Psalm 106:25) - But murmured in their tents, And hearkened not unto the voice of the LORD
      (Ephesians 4:29) - Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers

      Comment

      • Pim Pendergast
        PHD - Theophysicist
        Saving The Lost With The Truth Of Applied Theoscience
        True Christian™
        • Jun 2012
        • 3103

        #4
        Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, John Cresser!

        Happy birthday!
        sigpicMt 21:42, 44 Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures, The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord's doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes . . . ? And whosoever shall fall on this stone shall be broken: but on whomsoever it shall fall, it will grind him to powder.

        Find out what the Bible says about: Fortnite: Battle Royale, asexuality, shaving, psychiatry, chronic fatigue syndrome, babies

        Comment

        • Faith_Machine
          Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
          True Christian™
          • Mar 2011
          • 10050

          #5
          Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, John Cresser!

          Happy Birthday, Brother John. I have a very nice present here for you, and I will surrender him to your control just as soon as my veterinarian has given him a clean bill of health. May he give you many years of faithful service.

          WARNING:
          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

          Comment

          • Mary Etheldreda
            Gushing for Jesus
             
            • Sep 2011
            • 23775

            #6
            Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, John Cresser!

            A Blessed Birthday, Brother Cresser!

            Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

            Comment

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