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  • Daisy Mae Johnson
    The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
    Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
    aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 15708

    #1

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

    HAPPY
    BIRHTHDAY
    BEAUTIFUL
    SISTER
    IN
    CHRIST






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    Tweet me Here
    My GODLY Bio Here
  • Mary Etheldreda
    Gushing for Jesus
     
    • Sep 2011
    • 23775

    #2
    Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

    A most Blessed Birthday to you, dear Sister in Christ!
    Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

    Comment

    • Mary Thompson
      True Christian Lady™, Certified Best Friend of Jesus
      True Christian™
      • Mar 2013
      • 653

      #3
      Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

      HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SISTER TALITHA!!!!

      You don't look a day older, Sister! But Congratulations on another year closer to your inevitable death and being on the Right Hand Side of Jesus!!!!!!
      Thinking of Abortion?
      That fetus will be in Hell, because they never had a chance to repent their sinful ways (Psalms 51:5) (1 Kings 8:46)
      Think of the children. Stop being a slut.

      Comment

      • Pastor Ezekiel
        Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
         
        • Sep 2006
        • 78556

        #4
        Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

        Happy Birthday and many happy returns of the day, Deaconess. As is your custom, I eagerly await the delivery of my classic 1976 Moto Guzzi LeMans motorcycle, from your ample collection. Praise Jesus.
        Who Will Jesus Damn?

        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • Didymus Much
          Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
          • Jun 2010
          • 14079

          #5
          Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

          Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
          ...I eagerly await the delivery of my classic 1976 Moto Guzzi LeMans motorcycle, from your ample collection...
          Aka: an overweight, underpowered, underbraked physics experiment (with turnsignals).

          It's because you know she'll never give you one of the Ducatis, right?

          ...Praise Jesus.
          You'd better. Ride a Guzzi hard and you may meet him sooner than you think.

          Comment

          • Talitha
            Deaconess
            Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
            True Christian™
            • May 2026
            • 15118

            #6
            Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

            Well, we know who the real True Christians™ are. DON'T WE???

            Out of the hundreds if not thousands of you here there are only 5 with any loyalty to your dear Sister in Christ on the auspicious occasion of her Birthday.

            I am in a Shunning mood today.

            Sister Talitha

            Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


            HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
            being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



            Comment

            • Father Maurice Lester
              Ring-kissing Papist dog
              • Sep 2006
              • 3366

              #7
              Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

              Originally posted by Talitha View Post
              Well, we know who the real True Christians™ are. DON'T WE???

              Out of the hundreds if not thousands of you here there are only 5 with any loyalty to your dear Sister in Christ on the auspicious occasion of her Birthday.

              I am in a Shunning mood today.
              After 80 or 90 of these I would think you might be over this kind of childish view of birthdays. The only birthday that really matters is that of Jesus, our Lord and Savior.

              Typical Baptwit.




              Bless you, my Dorian Grey,
              Father Mo




              .
              A Cardinal in the making.

              Comment

              • Wide-Open
                Director of European Evangelical Outreach
                A Shining Example of Christ's Love
                Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
                True Christian™
                • Nov 2007
                • 18449

                #8
                Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

                Originally posted by Father Maurice Lester View Post
                After 80 or 90 of these I would think you might be over this kind of childish view of birthdays.
                Father Mo, it's an easy mistake to make when you regard everyone over 12 "old", but I'm pretty sure Mrs. Talitha is nowhere near that age.

                Happy Birthday Sister!
                Psalm 81:10:
                I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
                open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

                Comment

                • Mistress Cookie
                  Petite pearl of Baptist womanhood
                  True Christian™
                  • Jul 2008
                  • 6790

                  #9
                  Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Sister Talitha

                  Dearest Sister-Above-Reproach:

                  Birthday Love to you on your Special Day.

                  How lucky we are that God™ put us here at the same time, to trudge this rocky road of sacred suffering and holy persecution together, In His Name.

                  XOXOXOXOXOXO

                  Comment

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