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  • #16
    Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

    How can you ask me to drive a communistic car and represent God's favorite Church? I need a new, customized Cadillac Escalade EVERY YEAR. Gas prices and mileage are up the the Lord!
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment

    • #17
      Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

      Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
      Brother Elmer, the Ford Fusion was just an example. How about a Chevy Malibu Eco? I understand it's quite thrifty with fuel.
      I DO believe you, Brother. But. What I said. The proposal was not perhaps prepared in the most careful manner worthy of Pastor Zeke or you as a True Christian™. Please, make a decent memo and provide us the Bible verses that support your suggestions. And some informative pictures and Tables. A worthy cause may be lost because of careless presentation.


      Exodus 16:5 And it shall come to pass, that on the sixth day they shall prepare that which they bring in; and it shall be twice as much as they gather daily.

      Yours in Christ,

      Elmer
      2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



      PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
      Check out our Research in Creation Science:

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      • #18
        Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

        If we are truly looking to economize, perhaps the Smarte car would be a good choice.

        In Jesus,
        NRL
        1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
        Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
        Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
        Locations in 50 States and Canada
        !Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
        Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
        Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.

        Comment

        • #19
          Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

          No, no, Naomi, those Smart cars are two seaters. Pastor needs a sedan so he can drive visiting dignitaries around.
          WARNING:
          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

          Comment

          • #20
            Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

            Brother Faith,

            I hear your concerns loud and clear. That is why we are opening up a service center on the member's only section. From there we can help get you on food stamps and medicaid if you are having a hard time making ends meet with your tithing requirements.

            Yours in Christ,

            Levi
            Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.


            sigpic

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            • #21
              Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

              Oh my goodness, brother Levi, I never meant to imply that I resented tithing! Oh Heavens, no! No, no, no! Please don't give this matter another thought, and please let's not have any talk of me going on food stamps! I've learned that by eating jars of store-brand peanut butter, I can easily get my recommended 2000 calories per day without having to spend very much money at all. Sometimes I even splurge on one store-brand bread and I have sandwiches!
              WARNING:
              In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
              REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

              Comment

              • #22
                Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
                Pastor Zeke, with all due respect, how is the church going to pay for tripling your stipend? That money's got to come out of some other program or service, right?
                I think Jesus had something to say about all this - He provides.

                Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?

                (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.

                But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

                Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

                - Matthew 6:31-34

                But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

                Now unto God and our Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen.

                - Philippians 4:19-20
                Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
                brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
                ...and get off my lawn
                sigpic

                Comment

                • #23
                  Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                  What an interesting thread!
                  Those who complain most about Pastor Zeke's package in the relative safety of the women's meetings are those who in this thread come out in favour of huge rewards for the said pastor. Presumably to cover up their duplicitous thoughts.

                  Comment

                  • #24
                    Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                    I think people need to calm down somewhat here and think about what is important here.

                    That's right: getting the message of Jesus out to the world in it's literal form. To do this one as to have confidence in the speaker.

                    Who would any of us here feel more comfortable with: a well dressed, tanned young man, clean limbed, blue eyed with good teeth and a winning smile, muscular (but not too much so) stepping out of a well specified auto that boosts the US oil and parts industries of this great nation in America?

                    Or a stunted, gnarled, nancy boy speaking ebonics and driving a Prius, no doubt cluthing a pamplet on Marxism?

                    Confidence.

                    Confidence is the trick here. How can people feel confident in Jesus' temporary Sacrifice and subsequent ressurrection if the person "leadin' the readin'" smells of urine stale sweat?

                    When I take my youthful, eager young, clean limbed young Newphew to see one of the men I hold dearest in the world I need to know that the person he is staying over with is trustworthy: my Nephew is very precious and I need to know I have confidence in the person watching him as he sleeps.

                    Who would you trust a naive young adolescent, with barely the downiest wisps of fluff on his soft cheeks with?

                    A barely human, paedophilic, tramp, smelling of man seed and poor people?

                    Or a Godly man, blessed by Jesus to deliver His Word with the trappings of Holiness?

                    Darn right.

                    YIC
                    1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

                    Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

                    Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

                    Comment

                    • #25
                      Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                      By the way, I'm putting a requisition for the new Mercedes Pullman. Saftey first, I always say.

                      Who Will Jesus Damn?

                      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                      Comment

                      • #26
                        Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                        Who do I talk to to negotiate my compensation package since I'm on my way to becoming a deacon?

                        Comment

                        • #27
                          Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                          I don't think you're on your way to becoming a deacon, but I will pray for you.
                          WARNING:
                          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

                          Comment

                          • #28
                            Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                            Originally posted by bishop polisher View Post
                            Who do I talk to to negotiate my compensation package since I'm on my way to becoming a deacon?
                            What about your 'Brother' Obama?

                            He looks after his own.

                            YIC
                            1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

                            Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

                            Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

                            Comment

                            • #29
                              Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                              Originally posted by bishop polisher View Post
                              Who do I talk to to negotiate my compensation package since I'm on my way to becoming a deacon?
                              The way you're carrying on, you're on your way to an all-round hotter experience, sonny.

                              But let's not go off-topic here. Nice car, Pastor!
                              2 Timothy 3:16

                              All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:


                              Comment

                              • #30
                                Re: The elephant in the room that nobody wants to talk about (Pastor Zeke's compensation package).

                                Originally posted by bishop polisher View Post
                                Who do I talk to to negotiate my compensation package since I'm on my way to becoming a deacon?
                                After seeing the Pastors request for next years car, you might want to rethink your options and apply for a job as chauffeur (that means driver). That is if you have a clean drivers license.
                                sigpic 1 Chronicles 16:15
                                Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
                                Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
                                Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

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