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  • Glendora Christianson
    Spiritual Mother of LBC
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 2329

    #1

    I'm Ready! Are You???

    I'm Ready! Are You???
    Attached Files
    Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.
  • SUV
    True Christian™ Princess
    The Driving Force behind RA12
    Have at it, anytime!
    • Sep 2006
    • 11027

    #2
    Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

    Oh my, Mother Glynndie, wouldn't I just Love to see JESUS riding that missle like Slim Pickens' character did in Dr. Strangelove!!!



    Comment

    • Pastor Isaac Peters
      Senior Pastor
      Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
      Always Biblically correct
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 10639

      #3
      Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

      As prophesied, the unbelievers will be goaded into trying to take on God's favorite nation, but they will be in for a bit of a surprise:

      Joel 3:9-14: Proclaim ye this among the Gentiles; Prepare war, wake up the mighty men, let all the men of war draw near; let them come up: Beat your plowshares into swords, and your pruninghooks into spears: let the weak say, I [am] strong. Assemble yourselves, and come, all ye heathen, and gather yourselves together round about: thither cause thy mighty ones to come down, O LORD. Let the heathen be wakened, and come up to the valley of Jehoshaphat: for there will I sit to judge all the heathen round about. Put ye in the sickle, for the harvest is ripe: come, get you down; for the press is full, the fats overflow; for their wickedness [is] great. Multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision: for the day of the LORD [is] near in the valley of decision.
      This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

      Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

      sigpic

      Comment

      • Sponge
        Confirmed Enemy of God
        • Jan 2007
        • 23

        #4
        Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

        Deuteronomy 4:16 Lest ye corrupt yourselves, and make you a graven image, the similitude of any figure, the likeness of male or female,

        4:17 The likeness of any beast that is on the earth, the likeness of any winged fowl that flieth in the air,

        4:18 The likeness of any thing that creepeth on the ground, the likeness of any fish that is in the waters beneath the earth
        I'd remove that image if I were you.

        Comment

        • Mrs. Mary Whitford
          Ladies of Landover Senior VP
          One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
          Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
          True Christian™
          • Dec 2006
          • 12414

          #5
          Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

          The good Sister did not make the graven image, she only found it. There is a difference.
          Posted via Prayer

          1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
          Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

          Blogging for CHRIST!
          Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
          All a-Twitter for Salvation!
          Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
          On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
          My Ladies of Landover profile!

          Comment

          • Sponge
            Confirmed Enemy of God
            • Jan 2007
            • 23

            #6
            Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

            Still, showing those graven images is surely showing the makers of that image that there is a need for them, thus increasing the amount of sin?

            If someone steals 40 loaves of bread, do you then go out and advertise that bread for the person who is selling it?

            Yes there is a difference, and even if it not be sinful, it's morally wrong... ESPECIALLY noting the fact that it is an image of our lord Jesus in a less than respectful manner.

            Comment

            • SUV
              True Christian™ Princess
              The Driving Force behind RA12
              Have at it, anytime!
              • Sep 2006
              • 11027

              #7
              Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

              Sister M & M, since this one so Proudly Proclaims his self as "Unsaved Trash" I shall attempt to explain it to him:

              Originally posted by Sponge View Post
              Still, showing those graven images is surely showing the makers of that image that there is a need for them, thus increasing the amount of sin? SIN! SIN! SIN!!!!! (& Abomination)

              If someone steals 40 loaves of bread, do you then go out and advertise that bread for the person who is selling it? Now who the heck these days could afford enough nice oleo to Butter that many loaves of Bread? Unless, of course, one Bakes Bibically-Correct Dungbread and collects the Right ("oooh! "Buttery!") sort of Dung.

              Yes there is a difference, and even if it not be sinful, it's morally wrong... ESPECIALLY noting the fact that it is an image of our lord Jesus in a less than respectful manner. Everything is Sinful, you big old crazyMan! Please do hush your stuff until you become more Knowing of our Bible!

              Comment

              • Sponge
                Confirmed Enemy of God
                • Jan 2007
                • 23

                #8
                Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                Too long didn't read. Nigger.

                Comment

                • SUV
                  True Christian™ Princess
                  The Driving Force behind RA12
                  Have at it, anytime!
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 11027

                  #9
                  Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                  Originally posted by Sponge View Post
                  Too long didn't read. Nigger.
                  Eh? Is there a black "person" on this Godly board now?

                  Except of course for Brother Rremy LeBeau, who is "White by Marriage"

                  Comment

                  • Sponge
                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                    • Jan 2007
                    • 23

                    #10
                    Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                    Originally posted by SUV View Post
                    Eh? Is there a black "person" on this Godly board now?

                    Except of course for Brother Rremy LeBeau, who is "White by Marriage"
                    I'm accusing you of being a complete nigger. Don't deny it, I can tell these things... I've seen you stealing bikes.

                    Comment

                    • SUV
                      True Christian™ Princess
                      The Driving Force behind RA12
                      Have at it, anytime!
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 11027

                      #11
                      Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                      Originally posted by Sponge View Post
                      I'm accusing you of being a complete nigger. Don't deny it, I can tell these things... I've seen you stealing bikes.
                      Oh my GOD, Brother Sponge, please don't tell! I only stole those bikes so I could get to Church on time! And the reason my face may have looked black was due to the fact that I also Bake my Dungbread every Sunday morning!

                      Please don't tell! I know By The Love of Jesus you won't squeal on me!

                      Comment

                      • Sponge
                        Confirmed Enemy of God
                        • Jan 2007
                        • 23

                        #12
                        Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                        I wont tell, but bear in mind that God sees ALL. Your face blackening attempt does NOT make you invisible in the darkness, nor does it excuse your use of cannabis. I hope you're ready for your day of reckoning...

                        Comment

                        • SUV
                          True Christian™ Princess
                          The Driving Force behind RA12
                          Have at it, anytime!
                          • Sep 2006
                          • 11027

                          #13
                          Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                          Originally posted by Sponge View Post
                          I wont tell, but bear in mind that God sees ALL. Your face blackening attempt does NOT make you invisible in the darkness, nor does it excuse your use of cannabis. I hope you're ready for your day of reckoning...
                          Who, who, I say, WHO told you I was a cannibal? "The wise old owl?"

                          JESUS! I must go and powder my nose and Hope the smoke has cleared by the time I return.

                          I've enjoyed talking to you, Brother Sponge ("Bob?" > "Squarehead?") and if you have any other Dog-matic questions, I'm sure one of our knowledgeable (and oh, so Handsome! ) Pastors or Brothers can really give it to you!

                          Blessed Be, and don't you take any woolen nickels!

                          Warm, Moist Hugs ™

                          SUV

                          Comment

                          • Sponge
                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                            • Jan 2007
                            • 23

                            #14
                            Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                            Thanks Wench.

                            Comment

                            • SUV
                              True Christian™ Princess
                              The Driving Force behind RA12
                              Have at it, anytime!
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 11027

                              #15
                              Re: I'm Ready! Are You???

                              Originally posted by Sponge View Post
                              Thanks Wench.
                              You too, Brother.

                              As I said, I must go now, but do keep up the Spirit; you have potential.

                              First you become a Member (hee-hee-hee). Then, you become True Christian. After that, who knows where it might lead? Look at me, a lowly woman: Moderator!

                              Why I feel just as Blessed as surely did Phyllis Shoofly! GLOWry!!!

                              Comment

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