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  • isabellealders
    Unsaved trash
    • Mar 2011
    • 15

    #16
    Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

    Originally posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
    Ever since Obama started wrecking America we have been piling up one disaster after another. Our economy is tanking, oil prices are sky high, we have huge problems with the environment and we have a serious energy problem.

    Is there a solution to all our problems?
    As always there is only one place we have to look for solutions to all our problems: The 1611 Authorized King James Version of the Holy Bible. Using the completely biblically correct approach of burning everyone in China will solve all our problems and will also greatly please our LORD and Savior® Jesus Christ!

    Does the Holy Bible really tell us to burn everyone in China!?
    It is well known that the Chinese have no morals and have sex with everything and everyone. God demands them to be burned for that: Leviticus 20:14 "And if a man take a wife and her mother, it is wickedness: they shall be burnt with fire, both he and they; that there be no wickedness among you." Genesis 38:24 "And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt."

    Also God demands we burn everyone who does not believe in Him, which clearly includes everyone in China: John 15:6 "If a man abide not in me, he is cast forth as a branch, and is withered; and men gather them, and cast them into the fire, and they are burned."

    So clearly 100% of all people in China deserve to be burned! God demands it! Psalm 140:10 "Let burning coals fall upon them: let them be cast into the fire; into deep pits, that they rise not up again."

    How does one burn everyone in China?
    In the past a great leader, clearly guided by the Holy Bible, created factories to burn millions of people. Fortunately for us the designs are still available! It will take some good old fashioned American engineering to scale this up to 1.3 billion people, but I have no doubt that we can achieve this.

    Does this really solve all our problems?
    If everyone in China is dead, they will no longer compete with our economy! China buys huge quantities of oil, so once they stop doing that, oil prices will plummet to acceptable levels! Burning a single Chinese will give you about 300,000 kJ of energy. So burning of all of them will solve all our energy problems! And since the Chinese are the biggest polluters on the planet, burning all of them will be great for the environment!

    So my car can run on dead Chinese people?
    Well, they don't actually have to be dead yet to serve as fuel for your car, but yes they can. Good old fashioned American steam engine technology can be used for this. Simply shove the Chinese people in the firebox of your car! Watching them try to escape will be great entertainment for your children! Much better than having them play those soul destroying games on a dreadful Gameboy.
    please tell me this is not serious.....

    Comment

    • Cranky Old Man
      Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
      You kids get off his lawn!
       
      • Jan 2010
      • 22368

      #17
      Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

      Originally posted by isabellealders View Post
      please tell me this is not serious.....
      How can it not be serious? The Bible is very clear on who we have to burn.
      5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
      To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
      James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

      Comment

      • Daisy Mae Johnson
        The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
        Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
        aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2006
        • 15708

        #18
        Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

        I bet they'll catch on fire pretty easy with all that sake wine they drink.


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        Comment

        • Synchronicityx3
          Confirmed Enemy of God
          BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
          • Apr 2011
          • 4

          #19
          Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

          That's just discriminating against the Chinese. Stereotyping them is not a good thing. I'm Chinese. Oh yes, so according to what you posted, I'm a sinner right? And Well, I don't believe in premarital sex and stuff, so am I an exception or something?

          Comment

          • Synchronicityx3
            Confirmed Enemy of God
            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
            • Apr 2011
            • 4

            #20
            Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

            And by the way Daisy, it's Japanese who drink sake. Not Chinese.

            Comment

            • Two-Dollar Bill
              True Christian™
              True Christian™
              • Mar 2011
              • 532

              #21
              Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

              Originally posted by Synchronicityx3 View Post
              And Well, I don't believe in premarital sex and stuff, so am I an exception or something?
              Well, you don't live in China for a start.
              Daniel 5:16-18 "Let thy gifts be to thyself, and give thy rewards to another; yet I will read the writing unto the king, and make known to him the interpretation."

              Comment

              • Nobar King
                Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
                Christ's Guardian
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2007
                • 23748

                #22
                Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

                Originally posted by Synchronicityx3 View Post
                And by the way Daisy, it's Japanese who drink sake. Not Chinese.
                I don't understand why you Chinese are so racist. I drink whiskey but I'm not Irish. I also have tried sake but I KNOW that I'm not Chinese.
                May you be a blessing to every life you touch.

                Comment

                • Palmer C. Eldrich
                  Unsaved trash
                  Current Status: Driving the Short Bus
                   
                  • Mar 2008
                  • 349

                  #23
                  Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

                  I'm more concerned with the amount of fuel it's going to take to burn all of those bodies. I'm sure the oil speculators will use this as an excuse to raise gas prices, again.
                  Things are going to get worse before they get better.

                  Comment

                  • randomperson321
                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                    • Apr 2011
                    • 26

                    #24
                    Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

                    If you burn all the Chinese who is going to produce products for Americans to consume. A huge % of clothing is made in China, the price will skyrocket. A plain white t-shirt will cost $50.

                    American clothing companies use cheap chinese labour costs to keep the price of their products low, you kill that labour pool prices go up.

                    Simple economics

                    Comment

                    • Holyfield
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Apr 2011
                      • 245

                      #25
                      Re: The Biblical solution to ALL World Problems: Burn EVERY Chine

                      Why not burn all muslims instead of the Chinese? They are just as many. Your car runs just as good on dead muslims.

                      The logistics will be easier. They are all bound to come to Mecca at least once in their lifetime. Get them there. Also, they don't even make squeaky rubber toys for dogs, they just make more muslims. A waste of the world's resouces if you ask me.

                      Then take the rest of the oil that they are still sitting on. Don't sell it to China.
                      Matt 5:17-20 "Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil. For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled. Whosoever therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and shall teach men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven:..."

                      Comment

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