[Trent Harvey, Jr.]

Re: Mitt Romney's history of animal abuse

You know what's craziest about this? The only reason we know about this story is because Mitt Romney chose to tell us. He figured it would gain him blue-collar cred: "I'm just an average guy, my friends own Nascar and football teams, my wife drives a couple of cadillacs, and I strap sick dogs onto my car like they're some kind of puking luggage. Just like you guys!" Clearly he's completely out of touch with people who do actual work for a living.

Still not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing though.

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Mitt Romney's history of animal abuse

"Wah wah wah, chased down and shot my puppy, wah wah"

This only increases my respect for SWAT teams. You know how hard it is to hit a small, moving target like a fleeing puppy?

Good observation, Brother Jeb. Of course, it's gotten a little easier to hit these challenging moving targets since our (now privatized police, employed by my company) got the green light to start using fully automatic weapons. There was an issue with that before due to the tendency of stray bullets to go through walls and hit neighbors' houses (and neighbors). Now that we've been granted full immunity in Patriot Act IV (which was never published due to national security reasons), our SWAT guys can happily spray the family bedroom with machine gun fire, secure in the knowledge that no leftist liberal lawyer can hold them to account when the occasional grandmother or toddler gets hit. We try to minimize collateral damage during drug raids, but hey, when you're fighting terrorists, you can't pull any punches.

With Patriot Act V, we hope to include a paragraph authorizing hand grenades and mortars.

Is there any way I could "embed" with the Freehold SWAT team?

Sure Brother! Actually, you'd be a good candidate for our Volunteer SWAT Team. Just like those volunteer fire departments which are the norm in small towns across America, using volunteers on SWAT raids saves taxpayer dollars and maximizes my company's profits. Any US citizen who is male, white and a registered Republican qualifies. Normally you'd also have to pass an eye test to prove that you're not blind, since we wouldn't want you firing in the wrong direction, but I assume that you can see since you're blogging here (hopefully without using that homo handicapped-enabling software), and as a True Christian we can grant a waver and take your word that you can see your targets just fine.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Mitt Romney's history of animal abuse

Nothing makes a Republican more patriotic and virile than the sound of a dog being tortured. But maybe this Republican took the party's recognized, long-time and traditional support of sadistic dog abuse just a little too far:

He lost the election for Governor by less than 32,000 votes out of more than 3.4 million cast. Perhaps he should have stressed that the bill would have mass murdered cats and other unwanted pets as well....

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Mitt Romney's history of animal abuse

Shout GLORY!!