[Alvin Moss]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

I believe that the rules disqualify any witches taken before the start of the hunt, on October 31.

My own hunting group has come under considerable hostility due to our plan to use artillery. Some accuse us of wanton destruction for sport and even cheating. That will never do.

We have now decided to conduct our hunt using only old timey weaponage. Most of us plan to use bow and arrow, though spears, cudgels and other clubs, tomahawks, knives, axes, chains, metal bars, dirks, swords, hurling stones, cross bows, daggers, pikes, nigger shooters, blow pipes, pitch forks and torches, war hammers, empty bottles, maces, burning barrels of pitch, machetes, snares and traps of all sorts and so on will be allowed as well. In addition to artillery and firearms, we have forsworn hand grenades and poison gas as well. There was considerable difference of opinion over the hand grenades, but the traditionalists won out in the end.

Our target remains the same: the coven of Mrs. Carpenter, who is a clear and present danger to all Christians and humanity in general.

[Des]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

I must say that after reading all the women's stuff in this thread I am quite certain that my my catch of almost 4 is doin' mighty fine and for once I really anticipate a victory!



Jeremiah 16:16
Behold, I will send for many fishers, saith the LORD, and they shall fish them; and after will I send for many hunters, and they shall hunt them from every mountain, and from every hill, and out of the holes of the rocks.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

Wait, we've started already?

[Elmer G. White]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

I must say that after reading all the women's stuff in this thread I am quite certain that my my catch of almost 4 is doin' mighty fine and for once I really anticipate a victory!



Jeremiah 16:16
Behold, I will send for many fishers, saith the LORD, and they shall fish them; and after will I send for many hunters, and they shall hunt them from every mountain, and from every hill, and out of the holes of the rocks.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

My dear, given that the event will be held on on the Freehold grounds, all witch hunters will be True Christians™ who know each other well. Any non-True Christians could be mistaken for witches. You wouldn't want to be on the wrong side of the hunting, if you catch my drift.

Thank you, dear sister, for ensuring my safety! I guess I'll just have to head down to the border to practice my target skills! Either way, fewer witches will abound our godly nation.

[Basilissa]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

Sister Basilissa, I was wondering if Forum Members are allowed to participate -- I was allowed to participate in the Annual Stoning, and I was wondering if I could practice my skills with a gun on some unsaved witches -- my darling husband says I need the practice and what better way than with the unsaved.

My dear, given that the event will be held on on the Freehold grounds, all witch hunters will be True Christians(tm) who know each other well. Any non-True Christians could be mistaken for witches. You wouldn't want to be on the wrong side of the hunting, if you catch my drift.

[Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

Sister Basilissa, I was wondering if Forum Members are allowed to participate -- I was allowed to participate in the Annual Stoning, and I was wondering if I could practice my skills with a gun on some unsaved witches -- my darling husband says I need the practice and what better way than with the unsaved.

[Basilissa]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

Maybe there is a God, but He just enjoys observing people killing, raping, enslaving, and pillaging each other in His name? Like some sort of an experiment, where God is the scientist and we are the lab rats? That would certainly make sense, it would explain why He never intervened, why He sent so many prophets with conflicting views of Him... He simply doesn't care about us, He just likes watching us doing inhumane things to each other. But if God really is like that, is He worthy of our worship? Or should we ignore Him as a protest against His cruelty?

By "nothing" do you mean you don't feel or think differently than before? Likely. That's because matters of faith are not easily detected with the 5 senses. Faith is what separates us from the animals. (That, and the use of cutlery.)

Continue to read, pray, and, in time, your faith will grow, as a newly-exercised muscle. That's a promise. 1 John 2:25. And remember, God is "on your side," i.e. He wants you to believe, to succeed, and to flourish, spiritually. Anything less would be.., well, cruel.

I applaud you for your patience with this Delirious woman, dear. Unfortunately, I'm afraid you're wasting your time. That poor woman might be beyond salvation. You see, her problem is not lack of faith. She seems not to deny the existence of a Creator, but rather not accept Him "as is." She wants God to be some sort of fluffy-bunny hippie love-for-all type, while the Bible clearly says that He is an angry God:

Psalm 78:49
He cast upon them the fierceness of his anger, wrath, and indignation, and trouble, by sending evil angels among them.

Isaiah 13:9
Behold, the day of the Lord cometh, cruel both with wrath and fierce anger, to lay the land desolate: and he shall destroy the sinners thereof out of it.

Even after loving couching and rebuking by several members of our congregation (Delirious is a frequent visitor near Freehold, she's sniffing around under the pretext of her Ph.D. dissertation), she still doesn't get it. She should be grateful that God allowed her to be in such a close contact with True Christians™, thus allowing her to see the Light of True Salvation. That is a unique chance that most people don't get in their lifetime (which is why most people are destined to Hell practically since conception).

Delirious - I still keep praying for you, but recently I've been doing it with less enthusiasm and less frequently.

[Rodrigo]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

Thank you. I've read it three times, nothing. I still have my doubts. Maybe there is a God, but He just enjoys observing people killing, raping, enslaving, and pillaging each other in His name? Like some sort of an experiment, where God is the scientist and we are the lab rats? That would certainly make sense, it would explain why He never intervened, why He sent so many prophets with conflicting views of Him... He simply doesn't care about us, He just likes watching us doing inhumane things to each other. But if God really is like that, is He worthy of our worship? Or should we ignore Him as a protest against His cruelty?

Then again, I'm afraid that He's going to send me to Hell for having such thoughts...

By "nothing" do you mean you don't feel or think differently than before? Likely. That's because matters of faith are not easily detected with the 5 senses. Faith is what separates us from the animals. (That, and the use of cutlery.)

Continue to read, pray, and, in time, your faith will grow, as a newly-exercised muscle. That's a promise. 1 John 2:25. And remember, God is "on your side," i.e. He wants you to believe, to succeed, and to flourish, spiritually. Anything less would be.., well, cruel.

[Dolores de Barriga]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

Sister Dolores, your questions are common ones, and have been asked, by the faithful and faithless, alike, for centuries. God is love, yet His love is often characterized as "cruel."

First off, may I suggest that you read, aloud, Psalm 31, as a prayer (much the way David did.) His prayer states and repeats the nature and character of God, which has 2 effects: it is pleasing to God (Hebrews 13: 15-16); and it builds faith.

Thank you. I've read it three times, nothing. I still have my doubts. Maybe there is a God, but He just enjoys observing people killing, raping, enslaving, and pillaging each other in His name? Like some sort of an experiment, where God is the scientist and we are the lab rats? That would certainly make sense, it would explain why He never intervened, why He sent so many prophets with conflicting views of Him... He simply doesn't care about us, He just likes watching us doing inhumane things to each other. But if God really is like that, is He worthy of our worship? Or should we ignore Him as a protest against His cruelty?

Then again, I'm afraid that He's going to send me to Hell for having such thoughts...

[Rodrigo]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

And this is the part of the Bible that I have most troubles with. I want to believe in a loving, caring God. Unfortunately, the Bible paints a much more cruel picture of God - as Miss Basilissa has noted, God of the Bible sends to Hell everybody who did not accept Him, which includes people who had no chance to do so in their lifetime.

Which God is real? The loving God I want to believe in, or the cruel God of the Bible? Would a loving, caring God allow millions of people to kill each other in religious wars - wars in which all sides believed they were believing in Him the correct way?... Would a loving, caring God allow people to be slaughtered, raped, and enslaved in His name?...

Or is history the proof that God is cruel and indifferent to human suffering?...

Or maybe there is no God at all and we just cling to an ancient book written by a bunch of misogynistic old men?...

Oh, how I admire the Landover Baptists for their strong faith!... I'm so afraid of Hell, and with all my doubts, that must be where I'm headed!...

Sister Dolores, your questions are common ones, and have been asked, by the faithful and faithless, alike, for centuries. God is love, yet His love is often characterized as "cruel."

First off, may I suggest that you read, aloud, Psalm 31, as a prayer (much the way David did.) His prayer states and repeats the nature and character of God, which has 2 effects: it is pleasing to God (Hebrews 13: 15-16); and it builds faith.

1 In thee, O Lord, do I put my trust; let me never be ashamed: deliver me in thy righteousness.

2 Bow down thine ear to me; deliver me speedily: be thou my strong rock, for an house of defence to save me.

3 For thou art my rock and my fortress; therefore for thy name's sake lead me, and guide me.

4 Pull me out of the net that they have laid privily for me: for thou art my strength.

5 Into thine hand I commit my spirit: thou hast redeemed me, O Lord God of truth.

6 I have hated them that regard lying vanities: but I trust in the Lord.

7 I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities;

8 And hast not shut me up into the hand of the enemy: thou hast set my feet in a large room.

9 Have mercy upon me, O Lord, for I am in trouble: mine eye is consumed with grief, yea, my soul and my belly.

10 For my life is spent with grief, and my years with sighing: my strength faileth because of mine iniquity, and my bones are consumed.

11 I was a reproach among all mine enemies, but especially among my neighbours, and a fear to mine acquaintance: they that did see me without fled from me.

12 I am forgotten as a dead man out of mind: I am like a broken vessel.

13 For I have heard the slander of many: fear was on every side: while they took counsel together against me, they devised to take away my life.

14 But I trusted in thee, O Lord: I said, Thou art my God.

15 My times are in thy hand: deliver me from the hand of mine enemies, and from them that persecute me.

16 Make thy face to shine upon thy servant: save me for thy mercies' sake.

17 Let me not be ashamed, O Lord; for I have called upon thee: let the wicked be ashamed, and let them be silent in the grave.

18 Let the lying lips be put to silence; which speak grievous things proudly and contemptuously against the righteous.

19 Oh how great is thy goodness, which thou hast laid up for them that fear thee; which thou hast wrought for them that trust in thee before the sons of men!

20 Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence from the pride of man: thou shalt keep them secretly in a pavilion from the strife of tongues.

21 Blessed be the Lord: for he hath shewed me his marvellous kindness in a strong city.

22 For I said in my haste, I am cut off from before thine eyes: nevertheless thou heardest the voice of my supplications when I cried unto thee.

23 O love the Lord, all ye his saints: for the Lord preserveth the faithful, and plentifully rewardeth the proud doer.

24 Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord. - Psalm 31.

Also, I have found that praying for faith is an effective weapon against doubt. Perhaps your husband can lead you in such a prayer.

[Youth Minister Harry]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

What part of "THOU SHALT NOT KILL" don't you understand...

God instructs us to not kill, which is different than legally executing someone as instructed by God. Can you seriously not understand the difference between legally executing someone and killing someone? What is wrong with you?

Here's a Biblically accurate hymn about God's instructions for how to deal with witches. You can ignore God's instructions if you want, but you'll be cast into the pit of eternal torture and anal rape (the bad kind) along with the witches you are trying so hard to protect! Listen and learn!

[Dolores de Barriga]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

If anybody is eternally damned, it's because they REFUSED God's grace though faith in His Son...

And this is the part of the Bible that I have most troubles with. I want to believe in a loving, caring God. Unfortunately, the Bible paints a much more cruel picture of God - as Miss Basilissa has noted, God of the Bible sends to Hell everybody who did not accept Him, which includes people who had no chance to do so in their lifetime.

Which God is real? The loving God I want to believe in, or the cruel God of the Bible? Would a loving, caring God allow millions of people to kill each other in religious wars - wars in which all sides believed they were believing in Him the correct way?... Would a loving, caring God allow people to be slaughtered, raped, and enslaved in His name?...

Or is history the proof that God is cruel and indifferent to human suffering?...

Or maybe there is no God at all and we just cling to an ancient book written by a bunch of misogynistic old men?...

Oh, how I admire the Landover Baptists for their strong faith!... I'm so afraid of Hell, and with all my doubts, that must be where I'm headed!...

[Basilissa]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

What part of "THOU SHALT NOT KILL" don't you understand...it looks like Churchianity folk are willing to disregard ANY part of the Lord's word to fit their hateful agenda.

Exodus 22:18 Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.

You eat pork and shellfish, right?

Acts 10:10-15
10 And he became very hungry, and would have eaten: but while they made ready, he fell into a trance,
11 And saw heaven opened, and a certain vessel descending upon him, as it had been a great sheet knit at the four corners, and let down to the earth:
12 Wherein were all manner of fourfooted beasts of the earth, and wild beasts, and creeping things, and fowls of the air.
13 And there came a voice to him, Rise, Peter; kill, and eat.
14 But Peter said, Not so, Lord; for I have never eaten any thing that is common or unclean.
15 And the voice spake unto him again the second time, What God hath cleansed, that call not thou common.

If anybody is eternally damned, it's because they REFUSED God's grace though faith in His Son...

Correct. Including millions of people who had no chance to ever heard about Jesus, which is millions of people who were born and died before the spread of Christianity to their parts of the world, and also including babies who died in their infancy, thus incapable of understanding/accepting Jesus as their Savior.

We are so lucky to have been born in a Christian first world nation, where we were exposed to Christianity since childhood and where infant mortality is low! Praise for that! He clearly loves us more than some Muslim children who die without ever hearing about Jesus, and for that sin go directly to !

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

Because the souls which refuse Him obviously don't want to be in His presence for eternity; so He created the one place without His presence.

So we agree, He doesn't really care after all.

They make their beds, they can lie in them.

Damn them to Hell.

Now will you please stop spamming this thread with your foolishness and let the menfolk get on to their plans for the upcoming witch hunt?

Thank you.

[Paul Tarzan]

Re: 2015 Witch Hunt!

You avoided my question. If God cared about everyone, why do you think He created Hell for most souls to endure for all eternity?

Because the souls which refuse Him obviously don't want to be in His presence for eternity; so He created the one place without His presence.