[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Brother, do you mean Old Iron Crotch?

I hear her hide is so thick, she can deflect normal bullets and arrows!

Indeed she is Brother. Be careful. She always reminded me of a savage manatee.

[Levi Jones]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Is it possible Old Iron Crotch has been helping the witches released that have cleverly escaped from the TermiWix facility on a remarkably predictable basis?

Luke did mention that some of the guards were getting spooked the last couple nights, claiming that they heard a bear crashing through the woods at night, but finding gigantic Birkenstock prints out there the next day . . . Here I thought they'd been getting into the whiskey, you know?

Ask them if they have been hearing a heavy wheezing sound followed by complaining. Perhaps there is an employee there who will argue what color the sky is?

[SinisterPizza]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Oi! Gunshots fired in the direction of my coven's last moon ritual... we were skyclad. Making half a dozen naked witches scatter into the woods - including one of my lovers, who twisted her ankle running through a sodding swamp - to escape whichever one of you Landover lot decided to come hunt witches in Canada? Not funny

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Old Iron Crotch is legendary. They say she can melt the bullets in your gun before they even have a chance to leave the barrel. Anyone who bagged that one would be a hero in the True Christian™ world.

Is it possible Old Iron Crotch has been helping the witches released that have cleverly escaped from the TermiWix facility on a remarkably predictable basis?

Luke did mention that some of the guards were getting spooked the last couple nights, claiming that they heard a bear crashing through the woods at night, but finding gigantic Birkenstock prints out there the next day . . . Here I thought they'd been getting into the whiskey, you know?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Brother, do you mean Old Iron Crotch?

I hear her hide is so thick, she can deflect normal bullets and arrows!

Old Iron Crotch is legendary. They say she can melt the bullets in your gun before they even have a chance to leave the barrel. Anyone who bagged that one would be a hero in the True Christian(tm) world.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

I'm starting slowly this year. The Twinkie and Big Mac feeder is getting a lot of usage. I suspect I will get the trophy for the largest. I'm telling you judging by the depth of the footprints this old gal is leaving behind, she may be the elusive 400 pounder of legend.

Brother, do you mean Old Iron Crotch?

I hear her hide is so thick, she can deflect normal bullets and arrows!

[Levi Jones]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

I'm starting slowly this year. The Twinkie and Big Mac feeder is getting a lot of usage. I suspect I will get the trophy for the largest. I'm telling you judging by the depth of the footprints this old gal is leaving behind, she may be the elusive 400 pounder of legend.

[James Dewitt]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

He's up to 18 now? Sheesh, I've only got 6, and three of those were woundeds. Of course this is my first season and I don't know the territory as well as some of the more seasoned hunters. Then there was that little issue of being sent on a wild goose chase the first weekend... yeah, yeah, very funny.

I know its some kind of sick joke that they play on new people. Last year they told me to go snipe hunting first and use the snipe for bait. Spent all damn night in that field. One of these days I will get Cranky for that joke!

[Seth Campbell]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

I have a question. I am flying Phebe to Minnesota for a doctors visit on Saturday. Can I hunt witches up there? I am not sure how long we will be there, and I hate to fall behind, as it is Cranky has 18 and I only have 16.

He's up to 18 now? Sheesh, I've only got 6, and three of those were woundeds. Of course this is my first season and I don't know the territory as well as some of the more seasoned hunters. Then there was that little issue of being sent on a wild goose chase the first weekend... yeah, yeah, very funny.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

If anyone wants a permit, I have one going spare. James Barley will not be participating this year. I regret to inform you that it appears that James had hoarded 15 witches in his barn and has been disqualified.

Brother Ezekiel, I've been informed by Luke that those 15 witches have been remanded to TermiWix's custody, where they will be fed properly, allowed to rest, and given the opportunity to turn to Jesus before the Final Horde Release Helloween weekend.

It is interesting that, as the month has progressed, more of TermiWix's charges have come to Jesus. Almost five percent! I think they may be getting news of the hunt from the outside somehow.

Many thanks to the DeWitts for sponsoring the Home for the Recently Saved in Freehold. It will take some time to get the building constructed, but I'm sure the ex-witches will be comfortable in the yurts this winter.

They will also rest secure, what with the beautiful 8-foot wrought iron fence. I love how your architect specified that green-finished razor wire with the metal "leaves" on it. It looks like a beautiful vine twined along the top of the fence, a scene out of "The Secret Garden" or something!

Well, except where that one witch trying to break in got stuck in the razor wire and learned the leaves were just as sharp; that part of the fence looks more like a scene from "Little Shop of Horrors".

I guess the Halloween decorating is done?

[James Dewitt]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

I have a question. I am flying Phebe to Minnesota for a doctors visit on Saturday. Can I hunt witches up there? I am not sure how long we will be there, and I hate to fall behind, as it is Cranky has 18 and I only have 16.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

If anyone wants a permit, I have one going spare. James Barley will not be participating this year. I regret to inform you that it appears that James had hoarded 15 witches in his barn and has been disqualified.

Despite the best attempts of Bobby-Joe and The Boys to prevent any accident befalling Barley in his moment of shame, his liefless body was found hanging by the neck from The Old Bridge.

The cause of death seems to be 2 gunshot wounds to the head, although the matter of 2 broken legs is also being looked into.

There will be an estate sale on 4th November to cover the costs of the autopsy.

[Annie1]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

What were you doing out unescorted?

Well I didn't want to wake up my brothers or my dad, that would be rude... and the walking path behind mt house is usually safe. I had my two huskies with me though so that's sort of like being escorted

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Brothers and Sisters I'm really scared right now. I was out walking the dogs in the early hours of this morning when a witch jumped out of the forest behind my house! I'm so glad that I had the dogs with me because I let them off their leashes and they chased it down. Praise God.

What were you doing out unescorted?

It seems that last week's horde of witches has been rather elusive, if there are still some around. Well, Luke over at TermiWix has good news for the less-able hunters.

This week (Yes, it's FRIDAY!), TermiWix will release a selection of 10 individual (not coven-associated) practitioners of witchcraft. These obese basement-dwellers should be easy targets. They don't move fast, they rarely go outdoors, and will probably only waddle in circles once they lose sight of the TermiWix facility.

Remember that kills within a half-mile radius of the facility do not count, and all witches are tagged and monitored. No cheating!

Yes, we know. Yes, I mean you. Check with Mayor Hold, and you'll see that your score was reduced. If you do it again, you'll be disqualified and all your points given to Kassandra, Witch on a Bender.

[Annie1]

Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

Brothers and Sisters I'm really scared right now. I was out walking the dogs in the early hours of this morning when a witch jumped out of the forest behind my house! I'm so glad that I had the dogs with me because I let them off their leashes and they chased it down. Praise God.

Psalm 37:28 - For the LORD loveth judgment, and forsaketh not his saints; they are preserved for ever: but the seed of the wicked shall be cut off.

They killed the one that tried to get me but Rex kept barking at the woods and I think there are more back there. I ran home and told my pa and he and my brothers are going out hunting this afternoon.

I wish we lived somewhere safer