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  • James Hutchins
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
    Wouldn't babies be a better bait?

    After a couple of days in the woods, I imagine the witches are more hungry than . . . in need of other forms of "nourishment"!
    Yes, babies would be good but they are noisy. Also, they do not put up a fight and many a witch has been known to 'snatch and go'. A 20 year old shiftless buck will fight a good five minutes before a witches powers overtake him. I have plenty of these good for nothings that constantly eye up my daughter and shoot watermelon seeds at them I still have not figured out why those people do that).

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  • Divinity
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Oh no! I know of a witch, she praises satan and listens to satanic music. It makes me cry when I can hear such sounds going from her house.

    Leave a comment:


  • TrolololHerpDerp
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    You guys have got to be trollin'? :|

    Leave a comment:


  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by James Hutchins View Post
    I do hope staking nigras out in the fields with chains to their ankles are considered allowable bait. They will be alive at the time of the staking.
    Wouldn't babies be a better bait?

    After a couple of days in the woods, I imagine the witches are more hungry than . . . in need of other forms of "nourishment"!

    Leave a comment:


  • James Hutchins
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Boy oh Boy, the Hutchins household is abuzz with excitement. Barrels being rodded, magazines being filled, razor tips being sharpened. Even the little ones are putting edges on their little axes.
    The boys have created at least a dozen bonfires, ready to blaze in flames of glory with the slightest of sparks.
    We have not collected the leaves off the ground to make it easier to hear the witches sneaking about.
    This year, I know we will gt over 200

    I do hope staking nigras out in the fields with chains to their ankles are considered allowable bait. They will be alive at the time of the staking.

    Leave a comment:


  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by SinisterPizza View Post
    You will return my coven to Canada, unharmed, right this instant. Or else I hope you don't mind oh... I don't know... waking up tomorrow to find you've got bat ears and a tail?
    Miss Pizza, I regret to inform you that your partial coven "escaped" last Friday. If you haven't heard from them yet, they probably didn't do too well in the hunt.

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  • SinisterPizza
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
    Good news, everyone! Luke called a little while ago to let me know that an extra shipment of five naked Canadian witches was donated by the Ontario authorities. TermiWix has been asked to see if they can be taught to wear clothes, learn English, AND decide to praise Jesus in the short time before Halloween Weekend. Perhaps some of the Ladies of Landover would be willing to help?
    You will return my coven to Canada, unharmed, right this instant. Or else I hope you don't mind oh... I don't know... waking up tomorrow to find you've got bat ears and a tail?

    Leave a comment:


  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by SillySnake82 View Post
    All right Rev, I'm a hardcore atheist, please help me accept god, what do I do, how do I go about it? What shall I do to be a better person?
    1. Post an introduction in the Introduction Forum.
    2. Read the Bible in a Year section to learn God's Word.
    3. Believe what you've read.
    4. Stop derailing threads with irrelevant questions.

    Leave a comment:


  • SillySnake82
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
    I certainly expect so, Brother!

    After all, all TermiWix detainees are given the opportunity to accept Christ. Even the French-speaking ones. So, if they've refused, they certainly can't be Christians. Plus, the local jurisdiction is required to submit signed affidavits by three individuals of good character to certify that the witches so-called are witches in fact, and have been observed in spell-casting or other witchery.
    All right Rev, I'm a hardcore atheist, please help me accept god, what do I do, how do I go about it? What shall I do to be a better person?

    Leave a comment:


  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by Seth Campbell View Post
    I hope that TermiWix has actually confirmed that these are in fact witches. I would not be surprised if the Canadian (especially Ontario) government would try and ship Christians off to be shot.
    I certainly expect so, Brother!

    After all, all TermiWix detainees are given the opportunity to accept Christ. Even the French-speaking ones. So, if they've refused, they certainly can't be Christians. Plus, the local jurisdiction is required to submit signed affidavits by three individuals of good character to certify that the witches so-called are witches in fact, and have been observed in spell-casting or other witchery.

    Leave a comment:


  • Seth Campbell
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
    Good news, everyone! Luke called a little while ago to let me know that an extra shipment of five naked Canadian witches was donated by the Ontario authorities. TermiWix has been asked to see if they can be taught to wear clothes, learn English, AND decide to praise Jesus in the short time before Halloween Weekend. Perhaps some of the Ladies of Landover would be willing to help?

    On a completely unrelated note, Luke informs me that the guards have reported sighting several disoriented witches wearing bloody earmuffs and stumbling through the woods.

    I'm not sure what that is about.
    I hope that TermiWix has actually confirmed that these are in fact witches. I would not be surprised if the Canadian (especially Ontario) government would try and ship Christians off to be shot.

    Leave a comment:


  • Rev. M. Rodimer
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Good news, everyone! Luke called a little while ago to let me know that an extra shipment of five naked Canadian witches was donated by the Ontario authorities. TermiWix has been asked to see if they can be taught to wear clothes, learn English, AND decide to praise Jesus in the short time before Halloween Weekend. Perhaps some of the Ladies of Landover would be willing to help?

    On a completely unrelated note, Luke informs me that the guards have reported sighting several disoriented witches wearing bloody earmuffs and stumbling through the woods.

    I'm not sure what that is about.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pastor Ezekiel
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
    Did the shipment of 83 heads I sent arrive yet? I was careful this year to keep the heads intact as last year I lost due not having enough proof of killing the most witches.
    I just send in the ears. I'm up over 200 now.

    Leave a comment:


  • Cranky Old Man
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
    1. To prove a kill you must submit genitals, teeth, ears or fingers or toes to the Pastors if you cannot bring in the entire body.
    Did the shipment of 83 heads I sent arrive yet? I was careful this year to keep the heads intact as last year I lost due not having enough proof of killing the most witches.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pastor Ezekiel
    replied
    Re: 2010 Witch Hunt - No Bag Limit!

    Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
    Indeed she is Brother. Be careful. She always reminded me of a savage manatee.
    Legend has it that she has harnessed the power of vagina dentata.

    Leave a comment:

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