[Father TI25]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I do say I agree in this.

How would any child like to recieve candy knowing it is the food of the devil?

Even those Jesus gummies posted earlier in this thread, those are the food of the devil, just disguised as candy for us Christ lovers.

One time I ate a piece of candy, and my mother had to take out the paddle until I puked it all out. She didnt want ANYTHING of the devil inside of me.

Anyways, I believe we should just burn anything that even closely resembles the devil. Such as Pokémon toys and games or Saw movies.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I do say I agree in this.

How would any child like to recieve candy knowing it is the food of the devil?

Even those Jesus gummies posted earlier in this thread, those are the food of the devil, just disguised as candy for us Christ lovers.

One time I ate a piece of candy, and my mother had to take out the paddle until I puked it all out. She didnt want ANYTHING of the devil inside of me.

Anyways, I believe we should just burn anything that even closely resembles the devil. Such as Pokémon toys and games or Saw movies.

Amen! You seem to have almost acceptable Christian views. I'm just hoping you aren't a Mary worshiper. Your user name concerns me.

If you are so inclined, we generally encourage people who will be staying around to make an Introduction for themselves as a courtesy.

[Ksevio]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I recommend against doing this indoors where the Satanic fumes might be inhaled by unsuspecting victims. The smell of it will remain in your house for weeks!

[Maisuke]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

We're sending this candy back to Hell where it can't hurt any more children! Praise Jesus

Thank you very much for keeping our children safe from inanimated, edible objects mass produced and incapable of thought.

This honorable action deserves praising

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I recommend against doing this indoors where the Satanic fumes might be inhaled by unsuspecting victims. The smell of it will remain in your house for weeks!

A very thoughtful comment.

In my experience, bonfires are usually held outside.

[Wash O'Hanley]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

It seems wicked America has refused our offer to not burn their candy in exchange for them not celebrating Halloween. The candy burning shall go on as planned!

America will kneel before us and beg not to have their precious candy burned by sundown tomorrow!

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

It seems wicked America has refused our offer to not burn their candy in exchange for them not celebrating Halloween. The candy burning shall go on as planned!

America will kneel before us and beg not to have their precious candy burned by sundown tomorrow!

Will you be burning this false chocolate?

[Follower of God]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I think it would be important to let ya'll know that Halloween is NOT Satan's birthday. You really ought to do a little research on the origin of that day. Dressing up in costumes and eating candy is not worshipping the devil or celebrating him in any way. You can do that any other day of the year and it means nothing.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I think it would be important to let ya'll know that Halloween is NOT Satan's birthday. You really ought to do a little research on the origin of that day. Dressing up in costumes and eating candy is not worshipping the devil or celebrating him in any way. You can do that any other day of the year and it means nothing.

If you're a follower of God, why do you come here and blaspheme?

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

Tonight's candy burn was amazing! Phebe, Helen, and I came in to see it, and were simply astonished at the massive heap of candy (and plastic costumes and decorations) amassed for the bonfire. How many truckloads were there?

And we saw the impressive Des Moines collection that Brother Tannor spearheaded. Roger tells us they went up to the Treat Towns at the Des Moines area malls and convinced parents to swap the bags of Satanic candy for Christian treats, Chick tracts, and a chance at Salvation. No doubt many a heathen child went to bed crying in Des Moines tonight, but will be weeping with joy one day in Heaven as a result of their parents' wise decisions!

Like many others, we did leave the burn early due to the shifting winds. We really should have brought respirators.

Pastor Ezekiel, you will be happy to hear we were still able to watch the inferno from over a mile and a half away, from Sister Phebe's covered terrace! We turned on the gas outdoor heaters, then sat and enjoyed the last of Helen's "Jimmy D" series of tasty meat pies, watching the red, blue, and green flames shooting high into the night sky. Must have been 30 feet tall, maybe 40! We raised a toast to your awe-inspiring vision of a world free of demonic delectables.

If anyone doubted the candy was cursed by the Devil, surely the thick clouds of black smoke and strangely-colored flames convinced them. Evil, evil stuff.

(Did you ever notice that if you rearrange the letters in "evil", you get "vile"? It's true, see for yourself.)

[nomomydont]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I dont get it what exactly is wrong with halloween? Dont deny that every last one of you, just like the rest of us, enjoy luring that one cute 8 year old boy, thats trick or treating alone, into your home to have fun...Its the one day of the year that god is ok with sodomy,And every one is forgivin for the sins that we have brought apon ourselves by touching thies young boys. If our priests can do it, WHY CANT I?

[Wide-Open]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

I dont get it what exactly is wrong with halloween? Dont deny that every last one of you, just like the rest of us, enjoy luring that one cute 8 year old boy, thats trick or treating alone, into your home to have fun...Its the one day of the year that god is ok with sodomy,And every one is forgivin for the sins that we have brought apon ourselves by touching thies young boys. If our priests can do it

Oh dear.

Friend, have you noticed the banner right on top of this (and every) page.

What does it say?

WHY CANT I?

Ack! I would seek help for your secret desires. They are very inappropriate.

Psalm 78:30
They were not estranged from their lust. But while their meat was yet in their mouths,

[Minecraft]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

We're sending this candy back to Hell where it can't hurt any more children! Praise Jesus

Now there's one thing I agree with!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

If our priests can do it, WHY CANT I?

Maybe it's OK for Catholic cultists, but this is a Christian church. We don't have "priests", and we don't allow our leaders to rape children.

Enjoy Hell, Papist Godmocker.

[xErosx]

Re: Landover Baptist Halloween Candy Burning 2010

Wow. Hannah Montana is NOT rock and roll. Are you that out of touch with society. Get off your high horse f***er