Advice from Landoverians

[Brother Enoch]

I'm planning to bring the family down from Godless Canada to Freehold for a vacation/prayer retreat this winter. My children sorely need some proper Christian influences.

Can you suggest a good hotel? Or a good place to board? My kids are fantastic at chores, I didn't make the mistake of sparing the rod. They know they're place in this God-loving family.

[Ebenezer Wright]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

I'm planning to bring the family down from Godless Canada to Freehold for a vacation/prayer retreat this winter. My children sorely need some proper Christian influences.

Can you suggest a good hotel? Or a good place to board? My kids are fantastic at chores, I didn't make the mistake of sparing the rod. They know they're place in this God-loving family.

I would suggest speaking to Pastor Zeke, he has a few guest bedrooms on his estate. And I guarantee he will have a few chores for those children to do, in order to bring them closer to God of course.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

You are welcome to stay in my home. As long as your children do not make any sudden moves my Rottweilers will not rip them apart be the affectionate Godly dogs that they are.

YIC

I'm planning to bring the family down from Godless Canada to Freehold for a vacation/prayer retreat this winter. My children sorely need some proper Christian influences.

Can you suggest a good hotel? Or a good place to board? My kids are fantastic at chores, I didn't make the mistake of sparing the rod. They know they're place in this God-loving family.

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

You are welcome to stay in my home. As long as your children do not make any sudden moves my Rottweilers will not rip them apart be the affectionate Godly dogs that they are.

YIC

Ah, dogs. That might be a problem. My children are Inuit. While they are familiar with Huskies as work animals they have no concept of pets. Animals either work for you or are food. There is no in-between.

Worse, my children know how to fashion weapons large enough to take a Polar Bear down, and can do it in minutes. And since the normal Inuit prey is often larger than them they know how to hunt as a group. One distracts while 6 attack from the sides and rear.

I really don't want to have to eat raw dog meat (again), can you perhaps convince a blind person to move in while we are there? I'll try to convince the kids they are work animals - seeing-eye dogs. I'll do my best, can't promise anything though.

[Jean Poole]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

I hope you mean EX-Inuit. I'm not sure if I want any non-White Americans as a guest in one of our homes. If they are coming in a strictly servant capacity, that would be alright.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

I appreciate your concern Brother. I don't look at my Rottweilers as pets per se. They are more like disposal units that roam my estate and consume transients, nigra, etc.

I think this could be entertaining for us both, I have 6 dogs so it would be fun. I can always get new dogs and you can always make more little Inuits.

We can sell tickets and profit from it !

YIC,
Sayved

Ah, dogs. That might be a problem. My children are Inuit. While they are familiar with Huskies as work animals they have no concept of pets. Animals either work for you or are food. There is no in-between.

Worse, my children know how to fashion weapons large enough to take a Polar Bear down, and can do it in minutes. And since the normal Inuit prey is often larger than them they know how to hunt as a group. One distracts while 6 attack from the sides and rear.

I really don't want to have to eat raw dog meat (again), can you perhaps convince a blind person to move in while we are there? I'll try to convince the kids they are work animals - seeing-eye dogs. I'll do my best, can't promise anything though.

[Vayhr of the Warhost]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

You are welcome to stay in my home. As long as your children do not make any sudden moves my Rottweilers will not rip them apart be the affectionate Godly dogs that they are.

YIC

One problem: You don't live in Freehold. Idiot!

[JennyD]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

I appreciate your concern Brother. I don't look at my Rottweilers as pets per se. They are more like disposal units that roam my estate and consume transients, nigra, etc.

I think this could be entertaining for us both, I have 6 dogs so it would be fun. I can always get new dogs and you can always make more little Inuits.

We can sell tickets and profit from it !

YIC,
Sayved

Wouldn't it be far more tidy to simply keep them in concrete-floored, chain link kennels, sliding their dry kibble through a slot under the door, and hosing them down every few days? Maybe you could let them out for a run a couple of times a day, on a chain?

Surely kennels would be far more comfortable than those igloos they're used to.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

Boy,

You have been packing fudge in Ames too long and have not been around here. Bitterness over the fact that LBU rejected your application and your are stuck with the secular ISU is no reason to spew on our Godly Forum™

Every time you show up here we are all reminded of why your father left all those years ago.

One problem: You don't live in Freehold. Idiot!

[Vayhr of the Warhost]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

Boy,

You have been packing fudge in Ames too long and have not been around here. Bitterness over the fact that LBU rejected your application and your are stuck with the secular ISU is no reason to spew on our Godly Forum™

Every time you show up here we are all reminded of why your father left all those years ago.

Around here? What do you know about "here"?

YOU ARE DELUSIONAL.

I doubt you even live in Iowa, you nutcase. That is why you will always be "seeking the Truth©", but never finding it. Wake up and smell the coffee, loser.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

"here" as in this Godly Forum™

Around here? What do you know about "here"?

Funny you phrase it this way. You and Captain Asshat share many of the same qualities although his IQ is much higher than yours. You are doomed to failure in college but you will at least be able to put "some college" on the two paragraph document you call a resume.

That might even get you a night manager job at the Quik Trip® or Taco Johns® across the street from your old high school.

The only thing God wants from you at this point boy is for you to stand upright so your knuckles stop dragging and quit breathing through your mouth long enough to vote for President McCain and Vice President Palin.

YOU ARE DELUSIONAL.

I doubt you even live in Iowa, you nutcase. That is why you will always be "seeking the Truth©", but never finding it. Wake up and smell the coffee, loser.

[Vayhr of the Warhost]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

"here" as in this Godly Forum™

You and Captain Asshat share many of the same qualities although his IQ is much higher than yours. You are doomed to failure in college but you will at least be able to put "some college" on the two paragraph document you call a resume.

That might even get you a night manager job at the Quik Trip® or Taco Johns® across the street from your old high school.

The only thing God wants from you at this point boy is for you to stand upright so your knuckles stop dragging and quit breathing through your mouth long enough to vote for President McCain and Vice President Palin.

Jesus doesn't want a woman to be in authority over any man. Jesus and I both agree on that; therefore, you are voting against Jesus. Sadly, the pastor's are wrong in this case. They are only human after all.

These forums are as close as a sinner like you will ever come to Glory®. Listen here, heathen. If I ever caught you within Freehold I would beat you within an inch of your life and castrate you. If there is one thing I don't like it is a spineless butt kissing suck up. If you want to suck the pastors' dicks why don't you do it via PM's and stop embarassing yourself on the open forums. You will NEVER be a True Christian© because you are a pretender.

SayvedByTheLord
Sinner Seeking the Truth©
Member

Now f*ck off, sinner.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

Yes I am still the same sad little WoW wannabe I was when I darkened the doors of this forum. Our Godly Pastors® have been wonderfully tolerant of my infantile spews.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

Boy,

You do bring up a very interesting point with this post. I notice you do not have a slogan at all. Probably because our Pastor's don't know what to make of you.

I would suggest Sad Little WoW Wannabe® or maybe Numbnuts With A Plastic Sword© might be appropriate.

I leave it to the wisdom of our Pastor's and Moderator's to come up with an appropriate one.

Jesus doesn't want a woman to be in authority over any man. Jesus and I both agree on that; therefore, you are voting against Jesus. Sadly, the pastor's are wrong in this case. They are only human after all.

These forums are as close as a sinner like you will ever come to Glory®. Listen here, heathen. If I ever caught you within Freehold I would beat you within an inch of your life and castrate you. If there is one thing I don't like it is a spineless butt kissing suck up. If you want to suck the pastors' dicks why don't you do it via PM's and stop embarassing yourself on the open forums. You will NEVER be a True Christian© because you are a pretender.

Now obcenity removed, sinner.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Advice from Landoverians

You will NEVER be a True Christian© because you are a pretender.

Now f*ck off, sinner.

I can't help but notice that Sayved seems to be a True Christian(tm) (note: not (c) ), while Spayhr of the Tire is not.